Life After I Quit Being a Liberal

[kpete]

Life After I Quit Being a Liberal



...................

My life of freedom begins first thing in the morning, by wasting water during my morning toilette. (Note to self: only liberal weenies use French words.) Wasting water? Have you seen how much it’s been raining this summer? There’s no danger of running low on water; there’s plenty more where that came from.

After I pee, I flush the toilet a second time, to make sure everything went down. I don’t trust these low-flow toilets our fascist government made us install. I let the water run in the sink while I’m brushing my teeth. I take an extra long shower, letting the flowing water wash away any lingering knee-jerk tendencies, cleansing my soul with freedom.

When I get dressed, I no longer fret about where my clothes were made and by whom. Produced by Asian and Latin-American sweatshops? Who cares! They fit my waist and they fit my budget.

I go downstairs and pour my morning cuppa joe. Does the coffee importer use fair-trade practices? Hell, I don’t care if the beans were picked by Colombian peons held at gunpoint by members of a Cali cartel. Gotta have my morning caffeine, and I don’t care where it comes from.


MORE:
http://open.salon.com/blog/cranky_cuss/2011/08/17/life_after_i_quit_being_a_liberal

[provis99]

1. I don't think real conservatives are that nice and cheerful.

They are a great deal nastier, full of hate for everybody, including other conservatives and themselves.

[DCKit]

6. Nor would they have those thoughts... It's all "me, me, me".

They not only don't they care, they don't even consider those factors listed in the post.

It's just assumed that the world exists to serve them. Personally.

[Shandris]

7. While I loathe defending -anything- conservative...

...I'll tell you one thing from years of experience on 'their side' -- they ARE this happy as a general rule. The whole 'hate everywhere' thing you see on DU? Yeah...well see, they don't see themselves as 'hating' anyone. And that's why so many middle-grounders look askance at us like we're crazy when we talk about all the 'hate-filled' Republicans. Now, we may know that their misconceptions are, based somewhere deep down, all stacked atop of fear and loathing. But we categorically apply the word 'hate' even when it's not the best choice of words. It's one of those words that resonates with people though, and they look to SEE this 'hate' and, when they can't, they think we're full of shit.

Here's just a quick example off the top of my head (no, its not directed, planned, or anything like that, simply the first one that came to mind). "They hate gay people." Now, there are SOME conservatives -- and they'll usually tell you who they are, because there is no fear of being outed as a gay-hater really -- that do truly HATE gay people. But we take it farther. We apply it to people who simply go to church (I'm not talking about 'liberal' churches here, but the more conservative kind, which is most of them). "Oh those Christians, they hate gay people." And the guy you just said that to will look at the Christian and say, "Is that true?" And they'll reply with this answer. "No, of course not. The Bible says to hate the sin, but love the sinner." And now the middle-grounder looks at the Christian, with a 'reasonable-sounding' answer, and the liberal, with accusations of hate. Who ya think he's going to listen to? Not us, usually.

It's easy to dismiss conservatives as 'hate-filled Neanderthals who just hate everything around them and are miserable all the time'. But if that were true, we would have NO DIFFICULTY getting every last moderate and moderate Republican on our side. We only harm ourselves when we do. Call hate where it is clearly hate, and use better language when the line is blurry -- it's in our own best interest.

[midnight]

2. Sounds like being a liberal was one of being awake and thoughtful...

I have been purchasing fair traded coffee... Because of wanted people to be paid fair wages... Had not been aware of the possibility of people being held at gun point to do this labor intensive job... So much to learn....

[Major Hogwash]

3. Who wrote this? Gerard Depardieu?

Sure is a lot of talk about peeing going on lately.

[liberal N proud]

4. K&R

[DearAbby]

5. You know what

I believe that entire post would sail right over the points on their pointy pin heads. But I enjoyed the hell out of it. here here.