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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsI Don't Know If This Is Reliable...
Friday 12 January 2018 by Lucas Wilde
Millions of bottles of piss to go to waste following cancelled Trump visit
Britains stockpiles of bottled piss have been accumulated for naught after Donald Trump said he was staying at home.
Following the cancellation of Donald Trumps official visit to the UK, protesters and typically reasonable people have been forced to dispose of their stored bottles by burying them in the woods, nestling them amongst a supermarket shelf full of Lucozade, or throwing them from the upper deck of a moving bus.
Im bloody annoyed, confirmed Simon Williams, punting his bottle of piss over a fence and into a school playground.
I had a wonderful day out planned, right down to the sandwiches I was going to make ham, cheese and pickle. I was really going to push the boat out and make the most of Donald Trumps visit by drenching him in the piss Ive been saving up since the early summer.
Id even purchased a massive pump-action super soaker, which I would have definitely thrown away after the event I mean, just imagine.
Ive got another forty-seven bottles of stale piss hanging around the house most of it in the airing cupboard ripening.
God knows what Im going to do with them, but the wife is insistent that theyve got to go now that Trump says hes not coming. Shes so fussy about stuff like this its probably OCD.
To be honest, I dont know why the President even cancelled. Its my vague understanding that he likes having piss poured over him.
This would have been like a day out at a water park for him.
Following the cancellation of Donald Trumps official visit to the UK, protesters and typically reasonable people have been forced to dispose of their stored bottles by burying them in the woods, nestling them amongst a supermarket shelf full of Lucozade, or throwing them from the upper deck of a moving bus.
Im bloody annoyed, confirmed Simon Williams, punting his bottle of piss over a fence and into a school playground.
I had a wonderful day out planned, right down to the sandwiches I was going to make ham, cheese and pickle. I was really going to push the boat out and make the most of Donald Trumps visit by drenching him in the piss Ive been saving up since the early summer.
Id even purchased a massive pump-action super soaker, which I would have definitely thrown away after the event I mean, just imagine.
Ive got another forty-seven bottles of stale piss hanging around the house most of it in the airing cupboard ripening.
God knows what Im going to do with them, but the wife is insistent that theyve got to go now that Trump says hes not coming. Shes so fussy about stuff like this its probably OCD.
To be honest, I dont know why the President even cancelled. Its my vague understanding that he likes having piss poured over him.
This would have been like a day out at a water park for him.
Either way it's funny.
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I Don't Know If This Is Reliable... (Original Post)
JimGinPA
Jan 2018
OP
Motley13
(3,867 posts)1. piss for the shithead, makes sense to me
Farmer-Rick
(10,163 posts)2. I wonder if we can mail piss to Trump?
Maybe send it to Maralogo or Trump Tower. You can make it look like piss but not really be piss.
Or maybe send Mitch and Paul some of it? Just thinking out loud.
Ms. Toad
(34,066 posts)3. Newsthump.com UK spoof site. n/t
Angry Dragon
(36,693 posts)4. KICK