Mittens Does A Shopping Photo-Op.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/election-2012/simple-folk-mitt-ann-romney-grocery-shop-visit-home-coal-miner-ancestors-article-1.1130176

But before he embarked on this adventure, he had to be briefed by his staff.

CAMPAIGN STAFFER: Sir, we think you need to be photographed shopping at some regular stores.
MITTENS: Stores?
STAFFER: Yes, sir. You know, where people go to buy stuff. Like food and household supplies.
MITTENS: Oh. I wasn't sure where those things came from.
STAFFER: Here's a Rite Aid. You could go in there and buy some toothpaste or something.
MITTENS: You want me to go in there?
STAFFER: Yes. Buy a tube of toothpaste and a bottle of aspirin, something like that.
MITTENS: Will I have to talk to anyone? Or touch them?
STAFFER: You might have to ask somebody where the toothpaste is, and you'll have to talk to an employee when you pay for your stuff. If you're careful you won't have to touch them.
MITTENS: Well, all right. As long as I don't have to touch them. I assume they've been told not to speak to me first.

** 15 minutes later **

MITTENS: That was awful. One of the servants touched my arm and told me to have a wonderful day. The nerve!
STAFFER: Did you buy some toothpaste?
MITTENS: Here it is. I didn't want to talk to those people so I found it myself.
STAFFER: Uh, sir, that's K-Y.
MITTENS: Isn't that toothpaste?
STAFFER: (pauses) Um, yeah. Now let's go to the hardware store. Buy some things you'd use to wash your car.
MITTENS: I never wash my car. I have people for that.
STAFFER: You can pretend. Just go inside, get a bucket, a chamois cloth and some turtle wax.
MITTENS: Turtle wax? I thought you wanted me to get car wash stuff. I don't have a turtle, and I wouldn't wax it if I did.
STAFFER: Just go into that hardware store and buy that stuff.

*** 10 minutes later ***

MITTENS: That was even worse than the Rite Aid. It was full of ... tools. And laborers. People with dirty shoes and sweaty caps. Please don't make me go in there again.
STAFFER: What's in the bucket?
MITTENS: Go ahead and look. I don't want to touch those things again.
STAFFER: OK, you got some plastic sheeting... a sashweight ... a hatchet ... here's some rope ... some Drano ... and a roll of duct tape. Looks like you were working off Jeffrey Dahmer's shopping list. What happened to the car wash stuff?
MITTENS: I didn't know what to get and I didn't want to talk to those low people so I just grabbed these things at random.
STAFFER: Great. See that guy in front of the store? He's the owner. And he's talking to the CNN reporters. Telling them what you bought. Jesus.
MITTENS: Well, what did you expect? Our people don't shop! Seriously, don't make me do this!
STAFFER: Just one more stop. You're going into that grocery store over there, and you're going to buy food.
MITTENS: Food? That's more like it. I'll pick up a few lobster tails and maybe a rib eye.
STAFFER: No! Get some sweet corn and hamburger meat. And a bottle of catsup. And some lemonade.
MITTENS: But I never eat those things! That's what we feed the help back in, I don't know, California? Maybe Utah. Corn? Nobody eats that.
STAFFER: Sir, you don't have to eat it. We'll give it to the reporters. Just go in there and buy it.
MITTENS: OK, but I'm not going to touch anybody.

*** 10 minutes later ***

MITTENS: Look, I'm pushing this -- thing. Pram. Cart. The wheels wobble. It's dreadful. But I got some corn like you said.
STAFFER: Sir, that's not corn. It's zucchinis.
MITTENS: Oh. Those things all look the same to me when they aren't cooked. By somebody who isn't me.
STAFFER: And why did you get 10 pounds of rutabagas?
MITTENS: Is that what those are? I thought the dogs might like them.
STAFFER: Just smile for the cameras. Don't show them what's in the bag. And, oh, I quit.

[liberal N proud]

1. lol

[NYC_SKP]

2. LOL! He bought a bucket of "hardware stuff"!

Mitt Romney, meanwhile, ventured out from his multi-million waterfront vacation home into the small town of Wolfeboro, N.H., to do a little low-key shopping on Monday.

Trailed by reporters and photographers, Romney first stopped at a hardware store -shopping list in hand - where he bought a bucket filled with what he called “hardware stuff.”



(AP Photo/Charles Dharapak)

His next stop was a nearby grocery store, where his provisions included two ears of corn, Greek yogurt, caffeine free Diet Coke, Wild Cherry Diet Pepsi and Poland Spring bottled water, according to a pool report obtained by Politico.

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/election-2012/simple-folk-mitt-ann-romney-grocery-shop-visit-home-coal-miner-ancestors-article-1.1130176#ixzz22omPdXby

[Raine]

3. PHONEY, he doesn't even know what hardware "stuff" is. If you're going to fake it at least try

real hard to make it look believable.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

4. He grabbed random stuff off the shelves.

Plastic sheeting, a sashweight, Drano, a hatchet, duct tape and some rope.

[peacebird]

5. Thought this was an onion bit til they showed video on Lawrence.... Scary.

[NYC Liberal]

6. He just looks like an idiot doing this stuff.

Mitt, the problem isn't that you're a millionaire. Lots of great leaders have been rich. The problem is your horrible policies that shit on the poor and your complete lack of empathy for anyone who doesn't own five mansions and a dancing horse.

Bush's "clearing brush" thing was bad, but the "folksy" thing worked for him because, even though he's rich too, he's always been a juvenile frat boor who likes telling fart jokes.

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

7. Putting on a show as just an eccentric billionaire,

another weird guy like Howard Hughes but without the charisma. He has to know that no one can believe a guy who's so rich he doesn't know where all his money is would wear blue jeans, sport shoes, and do his own shopping. I can only surmise that he's trying to impress the public with an affectation of being a weird and eccentric billionaire as a way to make himself a little more interesting. The alternative to this would be genuine mental illness on his part.

[Kurovski]

8. That was good for a few laughs.

I'd love to see him in a busy thrift store.

[Kablooie]

9. That is so weird. It really emphasizes his 1%-ness.

Even if he were a normal guy it would look wrong and stupid for a presidential candidate to be shopping.

Why not have him make up a cardboard sign had let him stand on a busy corner begging for a handout? That would show how he's just a normal guy.