Romney Jubilant After Finishing in Dead Heat with Walking Joke in Sweater Vest

[babylonsister]

Romney Jubilant After Finishing in Dead Heat with Walking Joke in Sweater Vest
Mitt: ‘The Eight People Have Spoken’


DES MOINES – Former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney was overjoyed today after finishing the Iowa caucuses in a virtual tie with a walking joke who wears sweater vests.

“The eight people have spoken!” exclaimed Mr. Romney, who was joined by supporters celebrating his .0006% margin of victory.

The former Massachusetts governor put the best face on his razor-thin lead, telling supporters, “Say what you will, but eight votes is still six more than Rick Perry can count.”

Historians noted that the last time so few people decided a Presidential race they were all on the Supreme Court.

As for the other candidates, runner-up Rick Santorum said that he had received a phone call from President Obama: “He stopped laughing just long enough to say congratulations.”

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http://www.borowitzreport.com/2012/01/04/romney-jubilant-after-finishing-in-dead-heat-with-walking-joke-in-sweater-vest/

[Ikonoklast]

1. And he spent Ten Million Dollars to get those votes in Iowa.

Santorum wore out a nice pair of loafers.

Who really won, again?

[Scurrilous]

2. ROFL