HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Forums & Groups » Main » General Discussion (Forum) » Looking for a term to des...

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 08:54 AM

Looking for a term to describe a special kind of con.

This has to do with a technique that attempts to establish an immediate connection with a person. I've observed it in the backwater social networks in my area, so I don't know if this is specific to my area, or it's common everywhere. Essentially, people you don't personally know well, or at all, slip into your life by rights of a common background. Let's say, you both went to the same college. So the person feels they have an instant connection. That's the first step.

Second step is to further that connection by reaching into your past and assume some credit for something you believed you accomplished on your own. The one common example would be a job opportunity. In the most audacious example, the person claims they were responsible for your acceptance into the company. And this might involve something that happened thirty years ago! But the phrase, "I put a good word in for you" is an example of this technique. It's basically an attempt to make you feel like you're obligated to them and need to give them something in return.

That's the end game. To lower your defenses by making you feel like you're indebted to them.

I have seen this occur with so many people who I would never consider to be "con-men" that I wonder if it has become an acceptable practice? People show no shame in doing it.

13 replies, 471 views

Reply to this thread

Back to top Alert abuse

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
Arrow 13 replies Author Time Post
Reply Looking for a term to describe a special kind of con. (Original post)
Baitball Blogger Apr 2019 OP
nykym Apr 2019 #1
Baitball Blogger Apr 2019 #4
jberryhill Apr 2019 #2
Baitball Blogger Apr 2019 #6
jberryhill Apr 2019 #11
el_bryanto Apr 2019 #8
forgotmylogin Apr 2019 #3
Baitball Blogger Apr 2019 #5
el_bryanto Apr 2019 #7
Baitball Blogger Apr 2019 #9
el_bryanto Apr 2019 #10
displacedtexan Apr 2019 #12
Baitball Blogger Apr 2019 #13

Response to Baitball Blogger (Original post)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 08:57 AM

1. Confidence

from WIkipedia:
A confidence trick (synonyms include con, confidence game, confidence scheme, ripoff, scam, and stratagem) is an attempt to defraud a person or group after first gaining their confidence, used in the classical sense of trust.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to nykym (Reply #1)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 08:59 AM

4. Yes, but this is coming from ordinary people in the community.

Given, that the history of this place is probably more devious than most, I was just wondering if this experience was common to other people in other areas?

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Baitball Blogger (Original post)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 08:57 AM

2. "Con" is merely short for "confidence"


The general class of confidence scams is precisely to establish rapport, confidence, with the mark.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to jberryhill (Reply #2)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 09:01 AM

6. But, have you ever experienced it?

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Baitball Blogger (Reply #6)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 09:08 AM

11. I tend to be suspicious of friendly people in the first place

I never opened a Facebook account because... why do I want to connect with people of whom I rid myself forty years ago?

Also, I see fraud every damned day.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to jberryhill (Reply #2)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 09:05 AM

8. House of Games

"It's called a confidence game. Why? Because you give me your confidence? No. Because I give you mine." - David Mamet

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Baitball Blogger (Original post)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 08:59 AM

3. I was going to say "sales"...

But it's kind of hard because getting to know people and forming actual friendships are usually established by bonding over common ground. People who do it with intent to gain something might be mild sociopaths?

I'd call a person who does it naturally a "smooth-talker".

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to forgotmylogin (Reply #3)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 09:00 AM

5. Scary thought, considering that this behavior is common in a good ole boy style communities.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Baitball Blogger (Original post)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 09:03 AM

7. Ah - "The Meatball Sandwich" Classic. nt

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to el_bryanto (Reply #7)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 09:05 AM

9. Eh?

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Baitball Blogger (Reply #9)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 09:08 AM

10. It's like the Quincy Takedown but involves a sandwich and a distinctive hat. nt

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Baitball Blogger (Original post)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 11:02 AM

12. There is a term for preying on those you identify with.

It's called an affinity crime. An affinity criminal cons people of his/her own religion, ethnic background, etc.; however, I don't think the term applies to cons who merely pretend to have a real connection to his/her marks.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to displacedtexan (Reply #12)

Tue Apr 16, 2019, 11:18 AM

13. This might be the right direction

The affinity would be the community we live in. People are assuming they can interject themselves into our lives to evoke that powerful “we” connection. And if they manage to get through, they wouldn’t hesitate to smear us with all the wrong-doing this community is responsible for.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink

Reply to this thread