Father of the Year Helps Dress-Wearing Son Feel Comfortable By Putting on a Skirt Himself

[FedUpWithIt All]

I loved this story and the picture that accompanied it. I had to share it here. What a beautiful relationship these two have.

"My five year old son likes to wear dresses," says German dad Nils Pickert.

Back when he lived in West Berlin, it was certainly a conversation-starter, but not much more than that. Now, however, Pickert and his son live in a "very traditional" South German village where his son's predilection for dresses is the talk of the town.

"I didn't want to talk my son into not wearing dresses and skirts," Pickert tells the German feminist magazine EMMA. "He didn't make friends in doing that in Berlin already and after a lot of contemplation I had only one option left: To broaden my shoulders for my little buddy and dress in a skirt myself."

http://gawker.com/5938676/father-of-the-year-helps-dress+wearing-son-feel-comfortable-by-putting-on-a-skirt-himself

[freshwest]

1. That is so sweet! And men can wear robes and kilts, so have at!

[Drunken Irishman]

3. FDR's mom used to dress him up in dresses...

He turned out pretty good!

[Gormy Cuss]

7. Most little princes in his social stratum were dressed like that.

Today on the other hand we see parents obsessing over color choices, hair length, and gender-specific clothing styles because our society dictates identifiable gender in even the youngest of children. It's pretty warped, if you ask me.

[noiretextatique]

18. totally warped eom

[MADem]

9. Not just FDR. That was a fashion of the day, for little boys to be put in dresses and

their hair left long, and frequently curled in ringlets. You can see pictures of kids from all stations, high and low, dressed so back in the turn of the century up through the roaring twenties.

I am guessing it was easier to get a diaper on and off a kid in a dress (or eschew the thing entirely if outdoors) than it would be to be dealing with trousers. They didn't have the fancy diapers, either disposable or with liners, so they needed to be changed as quick as a mess was made. Also, why fight with the kid over things like haircuts until they're about ready for short pants and school. It makes sense, particularly for the times. Simplicity is elegance.

The factories made something else that was required for the dresses worn by all these children . . . the cloth diaper. By 1887 the cloth diaper was mass-produced. There was already a type of fabric weave known as “diaper.” Since this type of fabric was used, it became the namesake for the final product. Babies were no longer swaddled and their clothing was more liberating. ...

Within the space of a few decades, child-rearing practices were reversed, formal education was delayed and a return to nature was desired. Children were blank slates and needed play to develop their mind and body. Clothing and homes were adjusted to the child’s body and activities. Industrialization allowed more everyday parents to actually enjoy their infant children and not force them into adult behavior. Parents found this period so delightful they extended it as long as possible. Children were to remain innocent (translate “sexless”) as long as possible. In many old photographs it is difficult to tell boys from girls.

It was very common for children to remain in this state of dress until they entered formal school or even later if the boy was schooled at home. When boys reached this age they were “breeched” meaning dressed in pants. It was an emotional time for many a mother who was losing her “baby.”

The fashion trend of boys in dresses slowly died out as the ready to wear clothing market offered clothing choices that became even more child centered. By the 1920’s, most boys and some girls were dressed in a “romper,” a one-piece jumper pantsuit. Some “child experts” then became concerned that dressing girls in pants would somehow destroy their femininity!

http://heraldbulletin.com/peopleandplaces/x546198747/In-History-Why-little-boys-wore-dresses

[polly7]

2. Father of the year indeed. What a great story! nt.

[Lucy Goosey]

4. I love this so much!

Thanks for posting this; I've too much time today reading about Republican lies, it's great to get a reminder that there are some truly wonderful people in the world.

[Whisp]

5. what a great dad

*tears here.

bet he won't be afraid of his friend's silly remarks because he knows what's more important to him - his son.
we need an earthfull more of these kinds of dads.

[sarcasmo]

6. Great story, Thanks.

[KansDem]

8. Er ist ein gutes mann!

Spitze!

[Nine]

10. I guess I'm a bad Dem if I disagree with this parenting decision?

I'm sure the father is acting out of love, but I personally think this is a mistake.

[eShirl]

11. Where's the harm?

[Hell Hath No Fury]

12. I was a little girl who loved to wear "boys" clothes -

play with "boys" toys, climb trees, and generally engage in activities girls back in my day weren't necessarily doing. My Mom, though secretly worried, let me do as I please. I grew up into a straight, independent woman who wields power tools and can fix just about anything in my Mom's house.

The only thing that Dad is doing is letting his son be himself. It's a great gift, one that I wish more parents would give.

[loyalsister]

13. I get annoyed by they acceptance factor of girls in jeans playing baseball

vs. young men wearing tights and dancing ballet.

[redqueen]

16. "The only thing that Dad is doing is letting his son be himself."

Exactly!

This story makes me sooooooo happy.

[noiretextatique]

15. really? what is the mistake?

i never understood the rigid gender divisions surrounding the wearing of clothing.

[FedUpWithIt All]

19. At some point, in our fairly recent history, some parents were derided

for allowing their daughters to wear a pair of "Dungarees". It was a huge and shocking issue at the time. Thank goodness they were forward thinking and stood up for the rights of their girls to dress as they like. Now, nobody even thinks about a girl who dresses in less "feminine" clothing. It just isn't an issue anymore.

http://askville.amazon.com/women-American-start-wearing-dungarees/AnswerViewer.do?requestId=9776116

http://www.cottoninc.com/corporate/Pressroom/PressReleases/2012/item10419.cfm


I see this issue as no different. It will feel awkward at first, then it will become more commonplace and eventually it will become a non-issue. As a result, all the boys who "prefer" to wear dresses will no longer have to conform or face ridicule.

[JI7]

20. Can you explain how or why you think this is a "mistake" ?

[Nine]

22. I think it's wrong to allow children to make decisions that are bigger than they can comprehend.

Boys wearing dresses as their everyday wear strikes me as a different scenario than boys playing with dolls or boys who like pink or even boys who put on dresses and jewelry during imaginative play. The latter scenarios strike me as boys who simply don't have a lot of gender hang-ups, which I think is good. A boy who wears a pink polo shirt maybe just likes pink and doesn't care that it's more common for girls. When a boy wears a dress to school or otherwise in public, on the other hand, that strikes me as being very much about gender. It's essentially cross-dressing. And I think there are lasting consequences to allowing your son to go down that path and to build that identity among his peers and his community. To me it doesn't feel like giving a child freedom. Instead it feels like allowing him to become boxed into a narrow definition of self that may or may not match what he's destined to become.

I think it's possible to exert some control over what your child wears without being the cliche of the jerky dad who forces his not-so-masculine son to get a crew cut and do sports and hunting all the time. I don't think a child who is dressed in mainly a unisex style in elementary school, who is allowed to pursue a variety of interests and have friends of both genders, who has loving and supportive parents, who is allowed more expression in dress once he's old enough to understand and accept the social consequences of doing so, is going to grow up to feel his gender expression was squelched.

[Mmm_Bacon]

28. Well said...

The kid is too young to realize the ramifications of his actions. If that is his decision when he is more mature then more power to him.

[redqueen]

14. Yes! Enough 'gender' policing, nail polish is an accessory and a skirt is an item of clothing.

Neither are 'feminine' or the sole province of women.

I don't know why it's taken so long to start finally chipping away at this nonsense where boys and men are concerned. Women have worn pants for decades, it isn't 'masculine', they're just clothes!

[noiretextatique]

17. i agree 100%

well said, redqueen. rigid gender-based rules about pieces of cloth are just ridiculous.

[Initech]

27. I agree.

In fact I think tearing down gender barriers is the next step in human evolution. This kid and his dad are highly more evolved than most people who would freak out at this idea.

[redqueen]

29. Exactly. This primitive concept of 'gender', tying styles or mannerisms to sex...

it simply makes zero sense.

The idea that some clothes or accessories or hobbies or jobs or whatever are FOR men or women, or are inherently 'masculine' or 'feminine'... it's just nonsense. I dunno where the need to define these things according to sex comes from. It seems like just lazy thinking to me. Some/many x people do y. Some/many a people like b. So flipping what? How did these things come to be so meaningful to so many?

[Nye Bevan]

21. Personally, I would say "no son, boys don't wear dresses".

And I would take him to the store to pick out some nice pants and shorts.

I guess I'm just an old stick-in-the-mud.

[WCGreen]

23. It's cool, but it would have been a lot better if the kid was 16 or so...

I'm just sayin'

[MadrasT]

24. I love this sooooo much!

What a great dad.

[FedUpWithIt All]

30. Me too. I keep coming back to look at the picture.

True unconditional love and fearless support. It's beautiful.

[Initech]

25. Parenting win!

[peace13]

26. I will never understand why adults feel the need to define boy/ girl things to kids!

My son loved patent leather shoes and little 'Easter' purses back in the day. Each spring we would look at them on the shelves of the department stores. In the end we would get shoes that would be good for running and playing outside and he was happy with that. I never told him that 'those are for girls'. Well my mother could not stand it that he looked at the purses. One spring she barked at him. 'Purses are for girls!' He skipped along and replied, 'I wonder why my mommy never told me that.'

This is the same kid that refused to learn to tie his own shoes. He went to school and still couldn't tie them. I asked him if it was weird that his friends could tie their shoes and he said, "No, they tie mine too!"

Ya know in the end it all worked out , he graduated college, has a job and friends. Why do people sweat the small stuff? This dad is very sweet.