GOP Lawmakers Watch Silently As Trump Strangles Each Of Their Loved Ones In Turn

[Soph0571]

Opting to take more of a wait-and-see approach instead of rushing to pass judgment, Republican lawmakers reportedly looked on in silence Tuesday as President Trump worked his way through each of their families and, one by one, strangled all their loved ones to death. “After I watched the president slowly and methodically squeeze the life out of my wife’s body as she gasped, futilely, for breath, he gave me his personal assurance that he was not responsible for her death, so I continue to stand by this administration,” said Rep. Scott DesJarlais (R-TN), who along with every Republican in both the House and Senate stated that while killing off their families in cold blood might not be entirely proper, it was certainly not an impeachable offense, no matter how the media tried to spin it. “Now, this is not an action I would have taken myself. I personally would not have wrapped my hands around my 5-year-old son’s neck and crushed his windpipe. But if Donald Trump’s approach to governing is sometimes a bit outside the ordinary, that’s because Donald Trump is no ordinary president. And maybe that’s not such a bad thing.” Later, with his beloved sister’s face turning purple as the commander-in-chief asphyxiated her with a length of barbed wire, Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) appeared on several television news networks and said impeaching the president for her imminent death would be “insane.”

[link:https://politics.theonion.com/gop-lawmakers-watch-silently-as-trump-strangles-each-of-1838885386|]

Emphasis mine
Harsh....but..
You know what they say about the best satire!

[FM123]

1. The funny thing about the Onion these days is that more and more

articles sound like actual things I could imagine trump (and his GOP) doing....

[Fritz Walter]

2. There is such a fine line

...between satire articles on The Onion and actual news stories these days. And that line is microscopic these days.

We certainly live in interesting times, per the Chamberlain Curse.

[dalton99a]

3. .

https://www.democraticunderground.com/100212561836

[Vinca]

4. The Onion this week, the New York Times next week.

The only thing that saves Don on this one is his tiny, little hands.

[SilasSouleII]

8. Ha!

Well played.

[Bettie]

5. It is often hard, these days to

know what is satire and what is reality.

I have long thought that this very thing could happen and he wouldn't lose the support of any Republican congresscritter. They'd find more excuses for him.

They always find excuses for him.

[durablend]

6. Of course they would

If anything they'd claim " (so and so) had it coming to them--good riddance!"

[Bettie]

7. Yes, they would

and they'd go on and on about how exciting to be in a new phase of their life, finding a new family, that he had done them and the country a favor!

[calimary]

9. Nobody wants to admit they were wrong.

Nobody wants to, and nobody likes to.

And it’s even harder to admit, or face the fact, that you’ve been HAD.

That’s hard to do, especially when you have your own personal stake in it. Takes a LOT of courage. And maturity. And a clear-eyed take on reality. And it’s REALLY hard when one has invested heavily, and committed oneself, in the wrong direction.

[Bettie]

10. I have a feeling that most of these

people will go down with the ship.

[progressoid]

11. Whoa. The Onion went really dark.

[NCjack]

12. That is satire, but this is not: Today, Trump is killing our dear friends.

While we patiently wait for Republicans to come around to removing Trump, he is killing the Kurds.