Know The Signs: How to tell if your grandparent has become an antifa agent

[ehrnst]

KNOW THE SIGNS: HOW TO TELL IF YOUR GRANDPARENT HAS BECOME AN ANTIFA AGENT

For your birthday, she knits you an unwanted scarf. To be used as a balaclava?

She belongs to a decentralized group with no leadership structure that claims to be discussing a “book,” but no one ever reads the book and all they seem to do is drink wine.

Is always talking on the phone with an “aunt” you have never actually met in person. Aunt TIFA????

Always walking into rooms and claiming not to know why he walked into the room. Likely.

.............................................................

Total and bewildering lack of nostalgia for good old days.

Gathers with loose-knit, disorderly group of figures you have never met to play “mah-jongg,” governed by mysterious “rule cards” issued annually from a nebulous central authority.

Suddenly, for no reason, will appear or pretend to be asleep.

Insists on producing container of nuts whenever there is company. Why? Code of some kind?

Carries peppermints (chemical irritant?) in purse at all times.

Is taking Centrum Silver. But for what reason? Surely to build up strength for the coming confrontation.
..............................

If he is to be believed, he spends hours playing bridge.

He is walking non-threateningly at a public protest.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2020/06/10/know-signs-how-tell-if-your-grandparent-has-become-an-antifa-agent/

[Frustratedlady]

1. Caught red-handed. Damn, we've been so careful, too.

Never underestimate us old coots. We have a history and plan to use it.

The article left out pitchforks.

[Backseat Driver]

5. Yep, its insultingly cutesy - We're a decade into grandparenting now;

many our age already have another decade of experience in that role. Heck, the sole remaining parent, last I checked two decades ago, was a 91-year-old RW religious zealot lunatic, who sucked the life out of a brother and poisoned the liberal(?) agnostic mind of a sister. Not sure we'll last that long, so jokes at our expense aren't so funny unless we can take a chuckle at the opinions of others our own age approving more youthful violence against what they probably consistently voted into leadership over the last few decades, and that's sarcasm at it's best.

[Raven]

2. F**k you! I've I'd been pushed, I woud've bounced! :-)

[tavernier]

3. Photographs of people in every room of his house

yet denies knowing “who the hell these people are” when interrogated.

[Turbineguy]

4. Perfect timing.

There was some RW post on my FB page about AntiFa. This was a perfect retort.

[RainCaster]

6. The wife and i play pinochle with another old couple...

They are cops, BTW.

[skydive forever]

7. Aunt-tifa?

I actually LOLed at that one.

[UTUSN]

8. Bwah hah, everybody wannabe BOROWITZ!1

[musette_sf]

9. Del Boca Vista is a hotbed!!!!

[louis-t]

12. Haa!! The outtakes from that scene are hysterical.

[mountain grammy]

10. They got me!

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

11. Love it!

[burrowowl]

13. I needed a humor boost

Thanks

[Hock_Mir_Keyn_Chinek]

14. Then there's wierd old Uncle Lenny

Then there is wierd old Uncle Lenny, with his study full of Ham Radio equipment. Just who needs a huge communications complex hidden in a home, if not ANTIFA? (And probably funded by George Soros)

[raccoon]

15. Good satire is a beautiful thing! Nt

[hunter]

16. My grandparents were antifa agents.

My children's grandparents and great grandparents were antifa agents.

My children's great grandparents drove the nazis back into hell.

One of my wife's uncles was killed by the nazis in the last days of the war.

I'm an antifa agent, pacifist, and left wing Catholic.

I'll be standing tall even when I am knocked down by fascists.