Does anyone have access to any machines that can warp the time-space continuum?

[Tommy_Carcetti]

If so, please see me.

I suggest we somehow broadcast Michelle Obama’s speech from last night to the 2016 DNC Convention.

[Laelth]

1. You can find George Takei on Twitter. n/t

-Laelth

[underpants]

2. I only used to play scratch lottery tickets

Someday...someday!

[bmbmd]

3. Ask Eddy.

He's on the sofa.

[safeinOhio]

4. No machine.

But once had a bag of mushrooms that could.

[Cirque du So-What]

5. If I had access...

do you think I’d be hanging out in this shitty timeline? If I had access, I would’ve ensured this one never existed.

[lapucelle]

6. Comic Con has been cancelled...maybe you can borrow this...

[Chainfire]

7. I do, I invented it 8 years from now

[intrepidity]

10. Hate to tell ya

but it didn't work

[Chainfire]

12. Bite your tongue

You should have seen how bad 2020 was before I altered it.....

I just can't get no respect....

[Tommy_Carcetti]

11. I've been watching way too much Dark on Netflix.

And perhaps you have too?

[LastDemocratInSC]

8. Yes, a bowling ball.

Or any object with mass, really. Even a feather.

Any object with mass "warps" space-time to some extent simply by existing.

[Midnight Writer]

9. Got some herb that will do it.

[Trumpocalypse]

13. You can borrow this

Just don’t tell Doc.

[ProfessorGAC]

14. Not Yet

But, I'm close!!! No, that's a lie.
But, give me about 150 years and I'll get back to you!