I have some questions about preparing to have a will drawn up.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

First, I am not trying to do it myself. I have a complex situation. I'd be a fool to go it alone. Having an experienced attorney would be money well spent.

Before that, though, I understand that I need to prepare a list of what I have and what I owe before having a will written.

Would anyone like to recommend a book on how to prepare for drawing a will?

Also, what forum is the one at DU where this issue is best discussed?

Lawyers, especially, please feel free to speak up.

Full disclosure: no wife, no kids. Two brothers, both established and not hurting. I am becoming increasingly estranged from the older one. Politics, personality -- the usual suspects. He doesn't need the money. Hungry people do. I'm beginning to think less of a 50-50 split and more of leaving almost all of it to worthy charities. Food bank, for example. I don't care if the charities feed people who hold political views the opposite of mine. If the people are hungry, that's what counts.

I'm not out to be vindictive. I want to money to go to its highest use.

Thank you.

[Raven]

1. The quick and easy answer to this is to hire a competent Estate Lawyer. The first thing that

you will get from that person is a questionnaire asking all the relevant questions about what you have, what you owe, who you want you money to go to and on and on. What you can do in advance is to gather all your important papers and financial accounts in one place and spend some quiet time thinking about your family and where you want your money to go. BTW, if the lawyer does not give you a questionnaire, find someone else.

[gratuitous]

2. This is good advice

If you're not sure who to contact, your state bar association website may have a lawyer referral section. Look under "estate planning" for lawyers who specialize in this area.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

5. I already have a couple of recommendations. One is from the people across the street.

The hubby went to Yale Law. He and his wife have recommended an attorney in my fair city. He did their will or whatever the equivalent is. Close friends in the adjacent county also have someone they recommended, but his office is somewhat less convenient.

[Throck]

3. Not a complete answer....

Had mine done a couple of years ago. Lawyer gave me a list of things to consider and think out before we met.

First write your thoughts down before the meeting.

For gifting and giving have a plan A, B, C and possibly D. If plan A passes before you and then you pass without contingencies your stuff could end up in probate or go to the state. If I survive everyone, I have a charity pre-selected as a poison pill the state getting anything (plan "D&quot .

Have a first and second executor/executrix. We have two kids, lawyer recommended if our kids got along that they would be co-executor/executrix. Lawyer said it made for less court problems in the long run should problems happen.

Get your health care proxy included. DNR, organ donation, your wants and wishes.

Make sure you get a couple of copies of the documents and put copies in a place where people can find them.

A will is NOT final, you can change it any time, as many times if those on your list fall out of grace.

Those are the things that sit in my mind.

[empedocles]

8. The 2 executor will, is good for limiting probate costs, delays and problems.

I am doing that, but also using revocable trusts.

[marlakay]

23. Yes be very careful about executor

My dad picked my sister n law because she is a CPA but she hid finances from me, I had no money for lawyers to force her to show paperwork, I never got a copy. I ended up hurt because I was a bookkeeper and could also have done it. I was struggling financially at the time and they had lots of money and executor gets to keep a extra few percent for doing the job.

They wanted to fight my stepmother all the way to court even if we got nothing just for the principal, I couldn't afford that. I had to beg them to negotiate with her which we ended up doing.

Wills are awful and people should think how it affects their kids in the future.

[empedocles]

4. Thoroughly analyze your situation and problems. Then study revocable and

irrevocable trusts - you may just use the will as a pour over will. Lot of materials are online.

Then see a lawyer, who does estate and trust work.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

6. Thanks. This will be happening in the Commonwealth of Virginia, so your input is valuable. NT

[Ms. Toad]

16. Trusts for your situation jumped out at me, as well.

There were 5 siblings in my family - two my parents don't want to leave any uncontrolled money to, one who needs supervision, and two of us who will do the supervising/control. Trusts are a good vehicle for that.

I think my parents used the NOLO press book on living trusts to understand the nitty gritty details before they went to a competent attorney to draw up the documents.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

26. We're thinking along the same lines.

I don't want to walk into the office not knowing anything.

Thanks.

[phylny]

24. We are in Virginia (between Roanoke and Lynchburg)

and used a great lawyer. We had a trust drawn up, and while it was more expensive than a will, it’ll save our daughters money when we are gone.

[Fiendish Thingy]

7. you don't have to make a list of possessions and debts to create a will...

but it would help your executor/heirs to close out your estate.

We just updated our will without that information,(other than the instructions that all assets and property are to be divided 50/50 between our two kids) but I drafted a separate, informal document, to guide my daughter through our current debts and financial assets. I don't expect any conflicts between our kids over the division of the estate, but if you do, perhaps more detail is required.

As I have large collections of various items, I have only left very general instructions at this time, with perhaps a more detailed inventory to come later.

Just make sure your bank accounts have your heirs listed as beneficiaries; you might also discuss the possibility of establishing a trust, depending on the state you live in, it could affect the tax liabilities for your heirs, especially if you own real estate.

[Rule of Claw]

9. This part of the law, like most of law,

is "Not user serviceable parts."

Select an estate attorney. Our family did a trust.

Just in general, law is simply not DIY. It has nothing to do with intelligence, as I am sure you very intelligent. In pre-law, I had to study of course cases and precedents, but what drove me to despise the field was the arcane and honestly opaque way in which state laws were written, seemingly to ensure the courts and attorneys would never run out of things to argue about. Hours long debates, "I read it this way-well I read it this way."

Just a giant headache.

[former9thward]

10. A will needs to go through probate.

Which can be time consuming and needlessly expensive -- especially in a "complex situation" which you mention. Almost everything can be excluded from a will. Bank accounts -- joint signers, homes -- held in joint tenancy, 401K, IRAs -- with a designated beneficiary, etc. All these things are not part of the will if you so choose.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

11. Thanks. I guess I was using the word "will" generically. I mean it to stand for the

various processes by which my worldly goodies would be dispersed.

Thanks again.

[COLGATE4]

12. The only bad thing about a will (or alternative solutions

like trusts, etc) is not having one. You've made the right decision. If you leave this veil of tears without having your wishes memorialized the state will do it for you. Not a good outcome.

[MLAA]

13. I too used a lawyer and have no kids.

Chose to go simply by leaving percentages of assets 25% to one charity, 25% to another, x% to niece 1 etc. Left all household goods /cars etc except for art to a friend. All art to another friend.

[LuckyCharms]

14. Not a lawyer, but here is one small thing I encountered

while a lawyer drew my will up...

Mine went something like this...

My dog is to be homed by person X.

Person A gets to walk through my home and take whatever material items they would like.

Then Person B.

Then person C.

All remaining liabilities to be paid from financial assets.

Then $X to person D.

Then $X to person E.

Whatever remains is to be split between the following 3 charitable organizations. The lawyer advised against this because it could cause problems. He said to specify a specific amount to each charity, instead of "whatever remains".

[Ms. Toad]

18. It's pretty standard to leave the residue (whatever remains)

to one or more persons, split {describe the proportional split}. If you don't do something like this - and there is money leftover - the intestacy laws of the estate will determine where "whatever remains" will go.

Not sure why an attorney would advise against that.

[LuckyCharms]

20. Not sure either...

but he said to first specify an exact amount to the charity, and then specify how any remaining funds are to be distributed. This was done about 9 years ago, so I might be a little fuzzy on the details.

I essentially wrote an outline of the will before I saw the attorney, and that is the only thing I can remember that he wanted to change, with the exception of writing it in "legaleze".

[KentuckyWoman]

21. Residue

[Ms. Toad]

22. I must have been in law too long -

Residue would not even cross my mind as a funny term.

[Solomon]

15. I'm a retired estates and trust attorney. Hire a good estates and trust lawyer.

He/she will explain first what happens to your property if you DON'T leave a will or establish a trust. The law in your jurisdiction makes clear who gets what in the event that you don't. In a lot of my cases I found that the client really didn't need a will - what they wanted was the same as what the law would do. In those kinds of situations having no will at all is better than having a badly drafted will. Which brings me to my next point. The reason you want to hire a good seasoned estates and trust attorney is nothing is worse than an ambiguous clause in a will. It costs reams of attorney fees to litigate will/trust issues in court. Believe me. Think Jaundice vs. Jaundice (the subject of Dicken's Bleak House) That's an extreme example, but the point is made. Not only is the money wasted, but the family tears itself apart over the arguing.

Lastly, if you have enough assets so as to be subject to estate and gifts taxes, you most definitely need to hire an estates and trust attorney rather than a just a "probate attorney" who may not deal in tax issues.

[Renew Deal]

17. Leave me your DU account

And your toaster. I need a new one.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

27. I thought my DU account was going to be permanently retired, with my threadbare rags

hoised above the virtual -- well, whatever it is.

[Renew Deal]

29. lol

[Blue_true]

32. Maybe you can arrange from the ever-after to have your ghost come back and

haunt anyone that asks for your DU account and toaster.




I see where you are coming from wanting a well crafted will. I was the child that my Mom (my last living parent) chose to handle her estate. She did so by just designating me, she didn’t leave a will, although all my siblings knew that she had chosen me. Long story short, it was a nightmare that I would hate to see anyone go through, especially given that person also will be in mourning and dealing with those feeling. I got everything taken care of properly, but being able to work from a written will would have been good.

[KentuckyWoman]

19. My estate attorney gave me a worksheet

What I have.
What I owe
What do I want to do with it.

3 easy sections.

[Paladin]

25. You've already done the essential thing: Going to a lawyer.

Ask anybody who's taken a wills & trusts class in law school---scary stuff. It's amazing the trouble people can get into, trying to draw up their own wills. Count on your attorney to point you in the right direction.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

28. That the Yale Law-educated lawyer across the street handed it over to someone else speaks volumes.

NT

[Paladin]

31. It certainly does. Sounds like a good sign. (nt)