Gene Weingarten: It ain't over until the fat man sings

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Perspective | Gene Weingarten: It ain’t over until the fat man sings
How might Trump try to hold on to his rancid reign? Anything’s possible.
washingtonpost.com
6:53 AM · Jan 17, 2021

https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/gene-weingarten-it-aint-over-until-the-fat-man-sings/2021/01/07/07d97faa-3b36-11eb-9276-ae0ca72729be_story.html

In just a few days, we will turn the page. It will be quite a dramatic and happy page turning, like when you go from Page 55 to Page 56 in “The Cat in the Hat,” where the house has been turned into a disastrous mess by Thing One and Thing Two, but the cat comes back in with a special magic car and cleans everything up in seconds.

I doubt if Donald Trump will see it that way, though. History suggests he will stubbornly try to hold on to his rancid reign in any way possible — convincing himself, and as much of the public as he can, that he is still president. For example:

He’ll spend two hours a day collecting $1 bills, crossing out the signature of the secretary of the treasury, signing his own name with a Sharpie, writing in “President of the United States” and putting them back in circulation.

He’ll hire a posse of grim-looking men in short haircuts and dark suits to accompany him everywhere. They will have snaky coiled earpieces and will be instructed to periodically whisper into their lapels.

He’ll decorate his master bathroom with presidential seals. That way he will really think he is president for four to five hours a day.

*snip*