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Tue Sep 28, 2021, 10:09 PM

GOP Stalls Government Funding Bill By Detonating 50 Tons Of Explosives Inside Capitol Building



WASHINGTON—In a maneuver that experts suggest could represent a significant setback for the legislative ambitions of Democrats, the GOP reportedly stalled an upcoming government funding bill Tuesday by detonating fifty tons of C-4 explosives inside the Capitol building.

“This was a make-or-break week for Democrats, and the complete destruction of both Congressional chambers alongside the death of several sitting progressives is just going to make passing the Biden agenda even harder,” said political expert Andrew Srinivasan, describing the decision by House minority leader Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-CA) to plant and detonate 100,000 pounds of plastic explosives under the legislature as both a “cunning political move” and a major blow to the $3.5 trillion reconciliation bill.

“It’s hard to imagine how President Biden will address climate change or Medicare expansion after a crucial vote like [Rep. Mike] Quigley was immolated in the resulting blast. Frankly, the coordination required to blow up the Rotunda alone shows how much better Republicans are at marching in lockstep and toeing party lines.”

At press time, several pundits had praised the Republicans for their restraint in avoiding the nuclear option of obliterating Washington D.C. with a tactical warhead.

https://www.theonion.com/gop-stalls-government-funding-bill-by-detonating-50-ton-1847755034

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Reply GOP Stalls Government Funding Bill By Detonating 50 Tons Of Explosives Inside Capitol Building (Original post)
Zorro Sep 2021 OP
The Magistrate Sep 2021 #1
AllaN01Bear Sep 2021 #2
Wounded Bear Sep 2021 #3
burrowowl Sep 2021 #4

Response to Zorro (Original post)

Tue Sep 28, 2021, 10:26 PM

1. Journalism At Its Finest, Sir

Ought to be the paper of record....

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Wed Sep 29, 2021, 12:26 AM

2. after i had read the story twice and finaly saw the onion byline .:)

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Wed Sep 29, 2021, 12:38 AM

3. I wouldn't put it past them...



(And yes, I know it's The Onion )

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Wed Sep 29, 2021, 01:05 AM

4. The Onion nails it!

Better truth from them than from the m$m!

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