Today, I received a letter that began: "Dear fellow patriot,"

[CaliforniaPeggy]

It was from Dr. Ben Carson, who apparently now heads the American Cornerstone Institute.

In this five page letter, he pleads with me to join him in fighting "...the radical Leftists in the media, in Big Tech, in political office..."

So much of this letter is what we expect from the Republicans: Lies, projection, and yet more lies. Also there's a lot of vaguely patriotic language.

For instance: ...Recognize that our Constitution, our freedoms, and way of life are under attack from the political ruling class who treat "we, the people" with contempt, as inferior, like prisoners of their all-consuming obsession to destroy this country.

There is a postage paid envelope included. So, of course, I must make use of it.

My question to all of you is: How should I respond? Either with a polite refutation of their lies, or with some angry prose about don't you ever contact me again, you filthy bastards! Or like that.

This is too good to pass up!

[mvd]

1. Hi Peggy!

It could be possible to do both. Refute the lies, and then tell them off.

[wnylib]

34. That's what I would do. I would

start out saying that I am a patriot who believes in constitutional principles, too. Therefore ... Follow up with facts that refute his distortions and lies, including the nonsense about liberal media and the left destroying the country.

I would end by thanking bim for the opportunity and motivation to put my own values on paper in contrast to his. Then say that I will show his letter and my response to everyone I know and post them side by side on social media to expose the distortions and lies of the right.

[royable]

2. Attach the postage paid return envelope to the biggest rock you can lift. N/t

[genxlib]

3. I had a friend that hated her Alma Mater

When she received solicitations from them she would mail them a check for a nickel.

In the memo line she would write..."not one thin dime"

I always thought that was a better message than sending nothing.

[RainCaster]

4. Add a multi-pound payload to that post paid envelope

Attach it to a brick, Cement block or other weight object. Make them PAY for the right to hear your opinion.

[elleng]

5. refutation of their lies, how 'polite' depends on your mood.

[William Seger]

38. Yeah, I'd go for really calling the fuckweasels out, Rude Pundit style

That would at least be fun to write.

[captain queeg]

6. Get some of that glitter powder and put in inside a folded letter so when they open it causes a mess

[LeftInTX]

14. this

[ms liberty]

26. I love this answer. n/t

[William Seger]

39. Or maybe some white powder

... and a note that says, "I'm busy -- make your own cookie."

[Mr.Bill]

7. Take a red crayon and write in big letters

"I WANT MORE GUNS"

That should put you on their prefered mailing list.

[DBoon]

18. or say this

"I'm very busy right now. The voices in my head told me to prepare my guns"

[grumpyduck]

8. Without reading the letter, but

from your comments, I'd be tempted to say something like, "Hey. thank you. If I just change the references to left wingers to right wingers, this letter is perfect to send out to our side, since it spells out EXACTLY what you lying fascist assholes are doing to our nation."

[Mr.Bill]

10. Oh, that's good. n/t

[bucolic_frolic]

9. I Wouldn't say anything

I'd clip the literature of all identifying material, and mail it all back to them in the postage paid. They pay for the stamp. Maybe they'll waste some time on trying to figure out who does these things.

[Beachnutt]

11. Copy the address and send a letter every week

telling them facts..
or share the address on DU

[AndyS]

12. It's great when they actually send an envelope!

It costs postage to you and if you respond, which I heartily suggest you do, it costs postage back. That's pretty close to a buck!

I would check one of the donation boxes and hand write "Here's my check for Freedom!" on the form. Put the form back in the envelope but don't include a check.

That way they'll keep you on this snail mail list and put you on other lists as well. You can smile every time you get one of those solicitations knowing you cost them money, the mother's milk of politics (and grifters).

I've been doing this to the NRA for years . . .

[Maru Kitteh]

24. This is creative and quite brilliant

[relayerbob]

13. Fillit with as much useless and heavy crap as it will hold

[Skittles]

15. the weirdest thing is.........

he is right, that our Constitution, our freedoms, our way of life are under attack - but he is part of the party that is actively doing the attacking

[Trueblue Texan]

19. This is the way they twist reality...

...they accuse the dems of doing exactly what they are guilty of. It's SUPPOSED to make you feel crazy if you know the truth. Very effective.

[William Seger]

40. Yep, the hypocrisy of the right is simply stunning, but when you realize that...

... it's a DELIBERATE attempt to weaponize hypocrisy -- a true example of gaslighting -- it's appalling that it seems to be quite effective.

[Jim__]

16. Maybe send him a picture of Joe and Jill Biden with a cheery message about ...

... how things are looking up. Should make his day.

[Buckeye_Democrat]

17. "Patriot" has become Orwellian in recent years.

It makes me cringe.

[Trueblue Texan]

20. You could send them a check...

for $100,000 worth of thoughts and prayers. Sign it with a big SUCK IT! But maybe that's just me...

[JohnQFunk]

21. Better yet: DO THIS!

Tools needed:
- Wite-Out
- Fine-tipped RED pen
- Two 8 1/2 x 11 sheets of paper
- One business-sized envelope

1) Identify and "wite-out" every reference to political alignment.
2) Choose a proper replacement (i.e. "radical Leftists" becomes "fascistic Republicans&quot and write it in RED ink.
3) Write a proper cover letter:

Dear Dr. Carson,

I have proofread and corrected your letter.

You're welcome.

Happy Holidays!
[your signature here]

4) Include a return envelope with your return address. They can afford the postage.
5) Attach to all of the above an invoice for the appropriate amount for an hour or part thereof proofreading the document, say, $100. "Balance due immediately." Small print at the bottom: "Unpaid accounts will be referred for collection in 60 days."
6) Make good use of their return postage paid envelope.

[niyad]

22. Send back the envelop, loaded with paper, cardboard, whatever. A friend used to send

thin sheets of lead.. .

[canetoad]

25. I once used

A block of hardwood, the size and shape of a small encyclopaedia.

[electric_blue68]

35. Omg! 😂

[ironflange]

23. Glue it to a brick and throw it in the mailbox

[Takket]

27. save it for the next toilet paper shortage

[lpbk2713]

28. Print this out and mail it to them.

[nolabear]

29. Five pages? Good Lord. And about that Constitution...

He wasn’t included in it, you know. His ancestors weren’t considered people.

Carson seems to be popping up all of a sudden in various venues. Or at least his face and name are. I like the idea of sending it back and costing them money, and if it makes you feel good to give them a piece of your mind, by all means do. No one will pay any attention but you might enjoy it.

I know someone, a surgeon, who knew Carson. To say he wasn’t impressed would be an understatement.

[anotherOKIE]

30. Here is my standard reply

I have sent this letter back in the postage paid envelopes since before the last election.

How can you look at yourself in the mirror knowing that you are a traitor to your country? If you hate America so much, why don’t you go live in Russia with Trump and his mentor, the communist dictator Putin.

You are a disgusting human being and certainly not a Christian.

—Signed, a real patriotic American and a real Christian

I keep this letter on my computer so that I can just quickly send it to the printer and get in the mail. Nowadays, it is rare for me to get any thing from the repukes. I always hope that some brainwashed employee of whatever the company it is that opens these will stop and reflect upon their life when they look in the mirror that night. It prints out in pretty big letters.

[Shellback Squid]

31. ted kaczynski would have ideas

too soon?

[SheltieLover]

33. Stuff envelope with blank paper

[KS Toronado]

36. All the junk mail we get from repugs with postage paid envelopes

I cross out all their references to Ds and replace them with Rs, in blank spaces I ask questions like "Where is
the better & cheaper trumpcare the president promised me?" "Why didn't Mexico pay for the wall?" "When do
I get a tax break like the millionaires got?" "Has he grabbed your pussy?" etc, etc, You get the idea.

[lastlib]

37. Take a photo-copy of that postage-paid envelope.....

Print out a few thousand copies of it. Mail them all, just like you would the original.

Now, instead of costing them, say, fifty cents, you've cost them $500 per thousand.

[Martin Eden]

41. You want to express yourself AND make them pay

Get some heavy weight paper and make as many copies as can fit in the return envelope. Print on both sides so that each of the two statements below (or something similar in your own words) prints front & back, perhaps 4 times on each 8.5 x 11 sheet, cut into 4 pieces for multiple sheets like mini pamphlets.

On one side:
THE GREATEST THREAT TO THE AMERICAN WAY OF LIFE AND OUR CONSTITUTIONAL DEMOCRACY IS REPUBLICAN EFFORTS TO SUPPRESS THE VOTE, OVERTURN THE RESULTS OF FREE AND FAIR ELECTIONS, AND DESTROY THE SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE WHICH SECURES OUR FREEDOM OF RELIGION

On the other side:
THE GREATEST TERRORIST THREAT TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE IS RIGHTWING EXTREMIST GROUPS INTIMIDATING PUBLIC OFFICIALS AND COMMITTING ACTS OF VIOLENCE, INCITED BY DONALD TRUMP AND ELECTED REPUBLICANS WHO CONTINUE TO SUPPORT HIM

[Emile]

42. I thought Ben Carson died of covid.

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

43. Go big, Peggy! Launch the nuclear F-Bombs! Own the libs!

Storming the capitol is maybe a bit over the top.

Storm an ice cream shop!

[skip fox]

44. I used tostring them along. Express interest in their message and regret

that you cannot donate at present. Stay on their mailing list. That's money out of their pocket.

[scipan]

45. Suggest that there must be something wrong with his brain to

believe in such crazy things, and that he might be in need of a hemispherectomy.

While at Johns Hopkins, Carson figured in the revival of the hemispherectomy, a drastic surgical procedure in which part or all of one hemisphere of the brain is removed to control severe pediatric epilepsy. Encouraged by John M. Freeman,[91] he refined the procedure in the 1980s and performed it many times.[92][93]

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Carson