In child custody dispute, breastfeeding mom is ordered to use bottle

[Nevilledog]

https://www.washingtonpost.com/dc-md-va/2023/02/01/arleta-ramirez-breastfeeding-custody-dispute/

No paywall
https://archive.is/BIO2J

When Arleta Ramirez’s daughter was born in July, there was no question what the girl’s diet would be. Breastmilk is endorsed by the World Health Organization and the American Academy of Pediatrics, which cites “unequivocal evidence” it protects newborns from disease. Ramirez was also a breastfeeding veteran — she’d breastfed her son for two years.

However, Ramirez’s plan — and her daughter’s food supply — soon ran into an unforeseen obstacle: a custody dispute.

Ramirez said she and her daughter’s father split shortly after the birth, and the father moved out of their Northern Virginia home. On Nov. 28, a Prince William County judge ordered that the father be permitted to visit the baby four days per week ahead of overnight visits slated to begin in February.

There was an additional condition. “Mother is to make every effort to place the child on a feeding schedule and use a bottle,” the order read.

Ramirez wasn’t sure what to do. Authorities agreed that “breast is best,” but her baby fed as much as once per hour, and the father complained that feeding times interfered with his visits. Ramirez tried to pump but, at least at first, could produce little milk that way — and the girl initially rejected bottles, a problem that may complicate overnight stays.

*snip*

[GreenWave]

1. Sounds like Judge should be charged with cruelty to babies.

[2naSalit]

9. +1

[The Magistrate]

2. This Is Insane, Ma'am

Taking this, for the moment, as a serious objection, feeding the infant will no more interfere with his visits than it would interfere with his cohabitation during similar hours.

Of course it is not a serious objection but a rank exercise in harassment and attempt to exert control. A judge who did not see through it, but instead cooperated in the abuse, disgraces the office.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

3. What a horrible ruling! That judge is way out of line on this. n/t

[Tumbulu]

4. Just right up there with the everyday misogyny of the times

the guy who nearly killed the woman with weeks of torture gets a two year sentence then gets released and does it again, and then kills more people before killing himself, all the women killed in domestic violence matters where the guys get a night in jail to be released to come back and kill.

This has never stopped.

It just never ends because these guys all whine about how aggrieved they are, and somehow they are listened to but women are not.

[TheBlackAdder]

5. 4 days per week ahead of overnight visits for a baby? Is the judge trying to force them together?

[pinkstarburst]

6. I don't feel this is unreasonable

At six months, the baby should not be feeding every single hour and should be starting to eat solids as well as milk or formula. If this were a three week old baby maybe I would buy her reasoning, but I suspect there's both an element of genuinely wanting to breastfeed for the right reasons and trying to use breastfeeding as a manipulation tactic. Plenty of babies are bottle and formula fed and the father getting parenting time is important, too.

[Celerity]

8. 'use breastfeeding as a manipulation tactic' ...........Seriously?

smdh

[oregonjen]

10. Have you ever breastfed?

I have and babies breastfeed longer than 6 months and at sometimes irregular intervals. Depending on growth spurts, illness, or just needing comfort, a baby may nurse every hour way past the 6 month mark.

[Jirel]

7. Not seeing a problem.

The kid has had breast milk more than long enough to build up helpful antibodies. At that age, a kid doesn’t need to be constantly latched to a nipple. That strikes me as mom either intentionally making it difficult for visitation, or having a problem with making normal adjustments to a feeding schedule as a kid is ready for more mature feeding.

I have no patience for the lactivists who insist that ONLY breast and ONLY however and whenever mom wants should be the rule until the kid get weaned… maybe at age 5.

[oregonjen]

11. Wow, doesn't sound like you understand what breastfeeding entails

[Pathwalker]

12. Lactivists? Really?

[tirebiter]

14. Putting breast milk in a bottle is a common thing

My daughter is currently doing it. Her older sister did it and their mother used to do it. There is formula too. Nobody needs to dominate.

[Hekate]

15. There is sure some misogyny on parade here, which is disappointing. Well "daddy" is going to have ...

… a howling infant on his hands, and serves him right.