This was sent to me, Love it and it made me smile, Blue states want to leave. :-)

[freemay20]

Subject: Dear red states
We're ticked off at your Neanderthal attitudes and politics and we've decided we're leaving.
We in New York intend to form our own country and we're taking the other Blue States with us.
In case you aren't aware that includes California, Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and the rest of the Northeast.
We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation and especially to the people of the new country of The Enlightened States of America (E.S.A).
To sum up briefly:
You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states.
We get stem cell research and the best beaches.
We get Andrew Cuomo and Elizabeth Warren. You get Bobby Jindal and Todd Akin.
We get the Statue of Liberty. You get OpryLand.
We get Apple, Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom and Enron.
We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss.
We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs.
You get Alabama.
We get two-thirds of the tax revenue. You get to make the red states pay their fair share.
Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than that of the Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms.
With the Blue States in hand we will have firm control of 80% of the country's fresh water, more than 90% of the pineapple and lettuce, 92% of the nation's fresh fruit, 95% of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90% of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the US low sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy League and Seven Sister schools plus Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT.
With the Red States you will have to cope with 88% of all obese Americans and their projected health care costs, 92% of all US mosquitoes, nearly 100% of the tornadoes, 90% of the hurricanes, 99% of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100% of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.
We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you.
38% of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62% believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44% say that evolution is only a theory, 53% think that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61% of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.
We're taking the good weed too. You can have that crap they grow in Mexico.
Sincerely,
Citizen of the Enlightened States of America

[Motown_Johnny]

1. They grow some good stuff in and around Kentucky

[Le Taz Hot]

59. The best stuff I ever smoked,

and I've been smoking for a LONG time, was from Kentucky. It was something called River Road Red. I've never been so high in my life and that's saying a lot from a gal from the 60's.

[orleans]

83. really? that's your first comment on that?

kentucky has good dope?

[Butterbean]

2. This kind of divisive junk gets so tired.

[Scuba]

21. Don't read it then.

[Butterbean]

36. Such kind, helpful advice. Thanks ever so much.

[otohara]

22. Yep

solves nothing!

[DonRedwood]

30. I think it made a pretty good point.

The blue states are always helping out our red state compatriots and many southern politicians are downright nasty to us Dems. I think it is good to show how kind we are to them.

[Butterbean]

37. "Us" and "them," exactly...your post illustrated my point beautifully.

[Egalitarian Thug]

51. You're free to move. A lot of us have for just this reason. n/t

[Butterbean]

61. Are you FREAKING kidding me?? How very one percenter of you to say.

That is perhaps one of the most elitist, idiotic responses here yet. You don't know me OR my situation. How do you know I'm FREE to move? How do you know I have the resources to move?Are you going to magically give me a job, safe housing for my children, and the resources to pay my moving expenses as well? Are you going to give me reliable and safe transportation?

Step down from your frigging ivory tower there once in a while and realize that everyone doesn't live in your oh-so-perfect universe where they can simply pull up stakes and leave an area if they don't like the political landscape. Utterly ridiculous.

[Egalitarian Thug]

65. Another in the outrage category. Do you imagine that I didn't have to make sacrifices to

leave the land of stupid? Do you imagine that I didn't have friends and family? Do you imagine that I hate everything about Georgia?

It is a matter of choice. You choose to remain where you are neither wanted nor appreciated. You choose to raise your children in an environment of intolerance, violence, and hate. You also choose to pretend that you have no choice and that it must be done immediately.

I chose differently. It was hard, it was expensive, our standard of living suffered and it is far from Nirvana. In fact, my personal situation would likely be much better had I stayed, but the price we pay was and is well worth it and I don't regret it for an instant.

[Butterbean]

68. Excellent RW talking points there. Pull myself up by my bootstraps, eh?

[Egalitarian Thug]

70. Where did I say that? Nowhere, that's where. Quit trying to pretend that it can't be done and that

you have no choice. There are very few reasonable excuses, and none that are not temporary for living amongst those that hate you and your principles, if you in fact have liberal/progressive principles. What would Jesus really do?

[Butterbean]

72. Oh my gosh I am LMAO here. Are you sure you're at the right site?

Really? You're throwing WWJD at me now? Quit trying to pretend you're not looking down your nose at me from your little ivory tower and telling me to pull myself up by my bootstraps. Good Lord. Jesus sure as hell wouldn't tell half of the country that they should just take a hike because he disagreed with their political philosophies, that's for damned sure. You need to come to MY church, honey bunch. You might actually learn something about Christ's true message of helping your neighbor out instead of telling them that their plight is not your problem or concern. Then again, I doubt you'd stoop so low as to set foot into a church that dwells amongst the great unwashed in TEH EVIL SOUTH.

[truebluegreen]

74. Chill, dude.

Not saying you are, but you sound a little over-wrought. I mean "Honey Bunch"? Seriously?

[Egalitarian Thug]

75. Well Jesus, if he even existed, was a hard-core liberal. Further, I'm not throwing anything at you

except to call you on your BS "there are good people in the worst places in America so we have to tolerate them" excuses. Because that's all they are.

Right is right, period.

That was the core of your saviour’s message, do whatever it takes and pay whatever it costs. Love everybody, turn the other cheek, give till you have nothing left to give, John 3:12, He even sacrificed his record of perfection (Matthew 21:12) trying to tell you guys what is required.

I'm merely committed to the lessons that He was trying to teach you guys, and I don't even believe he existed. Yet you accuse me of "looking down my nose" at you because you aren't willing to make the sacrifices He clearly told you had to be made in order to be a good person and to heal the world.

Sounds like you are the one trying to lawyer your way out of doing what you know is right. I Lived in Georgia and liked it very much. As an educated, personable white man that was willing to abide by the dominant culture, much of which I also like very much, I would almost certainly have done even better had I stayed there. But as I already stated, I am actually committed to bringing as much good as I can to the world, and I found precious little sympathy for that in my time there.

One of the very first things I learned about The South, is that hypocrisy is a way of life there. So you can cram that attitude you hope to project where it belongs. I have seen your ways and the results it has wrought.

[sibelian]

67. I agree.

so many so ready to ditch the South. What about the progressives that live there?

[Sirveri]

78. We'll pay for you to move away. It would help avoid a pogrom as well.

[sibelian]

79. I don't live in the South.

Would you mind not posting things like that, please? I'm sorry, but I don't think your response was very funny. I know you're not trying to be deliberately cruel but I think sometimes people on this site can be quite unpleasant, albeit unconsciously. You're not really going to pay for anyone to move anywhere and I wish you'd be a little more sensitive to people who might read these things. You might think it's funny to talk about pogroms but there are plenty of people in the South to whom that wouldn't be funny at all.

[Sirveri]

80. I happily would pay to help refugees.

If you don't think they would like to murder liberals, you haven't been paying attention.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

3. Some days, I wish we could!

Thank you for posting this...

[Bucky]

8. Yes, it's so funny, that idea of throwing half the country under the bus.

Well, not half the country. The Red areas are only 47% of the country.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

38. I know you're upset about this, Bucky...

It was meant as a joke. That's all...

[Indpndnt]

58. That doesn't make it better and you know that.

Clayton Williams told a joke, too. And Ann Richards came from double digits down and beat him in the gubernatorial race. He said the exact same thing, "Just a joke."

And maybe people need to wise up and realize the OP has been here for just about a week. Now turning people on each other. I ask you, who does that? Sound familiar? Probably the highlight of his week.

The people in red states work harder than anyone else against the wingnuts, but hey, screw 'em if they can't have our side mocking them, too, right? The big difference is, the wingnuts don't know any better.

[myrna minx]

4. Yanno, there's a lot of great, enlightened people in the "red" states too.

[Bucky]

5. May I just say to everyone who jokes about splitting up the country: Fuck You.

This site is supposed to be for liberals. Of all my many complaints about the Republican Party, my number one is that they put the interests of their party ahead of their country. From voter suppression to stimulus-blocking, to politicizing foreign affairs and international tragedies, to harming the economy (and the general public) as a means to unseating the president... politics is all just one big "fuck America" to them.

If we start playing that game, we might not be as bad as them, but we would still be sinking to their level.

[txwhitedove]

46. +1, with you, Bucky. Besides, I just saw one election map that showed Texas as purple. We ALL

re-elected President Obama.

[malaise]

6. Ouch!

Very unkind

[dvakman]

7. what about blue parishes and counties

I'm from Orleans Parish in LA which was 79% for Obama. I realize this was written in a somewhat tongue in cheek manner, but remember that our president wouldn't have won the popular vote without all his red state supporters who are just as passionate about our country's future. I'm not sure this divisiveness will help the president achieve his agenda for the next four years either.

[ThomThom]

24. we need to remember that all the swing states are purple

but the exercise was fun
sometimes I wish we could dump them but then that would be inhuman they could never survive without our government and us.

[klook]

9. Good thing to post if you want to encourage a DU circular firing squad.

Not really my cup of tea.

[my2sense]

10. There are many of us

blue dots in red states working hard to turn our states blue. This type of nonsense is offensive.

[Sekhmets Daughter]

11. As I pointed out to the first person who posted this

Harvard and Yale are members of the Ivy League...

[Wait Wut]

12. I live in Arizona...

...I'm not offended in the least. I have family and friends in many red states. They wouldn't be offended, either. In fact, I just forwarded it to a Republican friend of mine, she thought it was 'cute'.

I'm pretty sure this wasn't intended to be factual. As a response to all the Reps/Cons crying that they want to 'succeed' (heh) from the union, I think this is damned funny. I hear it on a fairly regular basis and I'm tired of saying, "Go for it, please." This is a much better response and may even bring up an spirited discussion with some of my Republican friends.

[CakeGrrl]

19. Agreed. People are taking this too seriously.

People are missing the point of this OP. It's intended to remind those RWers who are partly serious about secession what they stand to lose if they fear being part of a "socialist" nation.

[roguevalley]

29. agreed. i live in once blue alaska. that op is a hoot

Half my family were deep south once. The ignorance they slap at is true. It was a good counterpoint to a lot of southerns CONSTANTLY bashing the north. I know. I was born in California and raised in Oregon.

[Egalitarian Thug]

57. Another good point. n/t

[freemay20]

13. Grow up people

If you can not tell this is tongue in chek with some of the references, you need to tweek your humor sensor. It does however address some of the same things you, the ones bitching, felt more than comfortable belittling people about during and prior to the election. You need to get over yourselves, you are not all that. It is humorous and needs to be taken as such.

[Bicoastal]

14. Thanks for informing us that this was humorous. nt

[cherokeeprogressive]

15. I'm thinking the people you told to "tweek" (It's TWEAK btw) their humor sensor are wondering where

you got your definition of humor. Maybe you should look it up and learn what it is...

This ain't it. It's not original in any way.

Don't quit your day job to pursue a career as a comic. You'll starve.

[freemay20]

18. Make some sense

If you see, this was sent to me, not an original. Can you say comprehension when you read something? Once again, you appear to only get out of something what YOU seem to want to get out of it. Grow up please, your adolescent behavior is a joke in itself.

[cherokeeprogressive]

20. Ooh, did I touch a nerve? Sting your funny bone maybe?

"Once again"? What's that about? What was your name the last time you were tombstoned and what was the reason you got the pizza?

You're still not funny, nor are you original. Them's the facts.

[Indpndnt]

60. Absolutely right.

Every word you said was spot on. This thread and all the ignorant responses just turned his worst week ever into a better one. Can't beat 'em? Turn them on each other.

[Blue_In_AK]

47. It might be funny if we hadn't seen this sentiment expressed over and over again here.

Red state progressives take nothing for granted, they work hard against tremendous odds, and they have more heart than many blue state people can imagine. The superior "we're ever so much cooler than you are " attitude is off-putting, like the person a couple of nights ago who was saying that Ohio and Florida should be thrown out of the union because of their election issues.

[trailmonkee]

82. have you posted many other things like this? I'm surprised by your tone?

[nadinbrzezinski]

16. This gem goes around every election.

[DFW]

52. It gets updated every coupld of years

the original must be close to ten years old by now.

[txdemsftw]

17. Oh goody...

this crap again.

[Fawke Em]

23. Fuck this divisive shit.

Made me angry.

Y'all want more blue states in the South and mid-West? How about getting off your asses and coming down here (or over there) and help instead of posting a bunch of divisive shit?

[Fumesucker]

25. As well as being needlessly divisive and insulting, that's a vast oversimplification

[RedCappedBandit]

32. Thanks for sharing. Nice contrast..

to the divisive attitude that a lot of us (myself included) tend to have around election time.

[fizzgig]

45. i find this so interesting

thanks for sharing

[Indpndnt]

56. Great post, Fumesucker.

[progressivebydesign]

26. That's hilarious. Apparently the humor gene is not passed down to a lot of liberals.

Some DUers spend waaay too much time wondering what to get offended about. chill out.. it's tongue-in-cheek. You guys must be a hoot at a party.

[cherokeeprogressive]

28. The exact same knock-knock joke, told by a thousand different people, tends to lose its humor. n/t

[RedCappedBandit]

27. Would be nice. nt

[BigDemVoter]

31. Yeah, maybe tired, but everybody needs to lighten the fuck up.

It's been a LOOONNNNGGGG year listening to these asshats.

[Fumesucker]

33. Even longer when you live in the belly of the red beast

It's not an iota smarter or less divisive when Democrats say this shit than when Republicans do.

[BigDemVoter]

40. Oh boy, so do I. . . in the belly of the UGLY red beast. . .

Surrounded by a LOT of people who LOVE Rush & company. I must admit there ARE some progressives here, but we're OUTNUMBERED badly. I don't mind the jokes. Everybody is tired & punchy. What matters is that we WON.

As far as being divisive, so what? I'm the only gay non-christian around here--I don't feel particularly protective of most of my co-citizens. They've demonized me, my community, my religious affiliation. They (meaning the koolaid drinkers) deserve a bit of what they dish out.

On edit-- they'll never see it. It's silly; it's somewhat tiresome, but hell, let people laugh & poke fun. Repukes ARE ridiculous.

[Fumesucker]

41. It doesn't particularly bother me personally but I know it steams more than a few DUers

That's what I meant by "divisive", it's divisive within DU and divisive within the Democratic party.

The OP is essentially saying that one single voter can make a state worthy of mockery or not. One single voter who swings a state from the Blue column to the Red one, there really aren't that many states are strongly red or blue, America is mostly purple, a mixture.

I suspect that the OP doesn't live in a red state either, it's one thing to mock your own, it's quite another to have an outsider do it.

[BigDemVoter]

62. I follow you. . .

It's kind of like when a person calls his sister a whore. It's a DIFFERENT STORY when somebody else does it!
--not meaning to upset/offend anybody by use of "whore."

[Indpndnt]

50. So we have to listen to them and now we have to listen to it from you, too?

How nice. Please proceed.

[bunnies]

34. Lots of poo-poo-ing on this thread...

but I think its quite funny & Ive never seen this joke before.

[Rockyj]

35. Its been Dems problem...

Not willing to tell it like it is! A bunch of mish mash "we're above that" mumble jumble that resulted in 8 years of Bush!
Get over yourselves!
We are the enlightened ones so rub their fat faces in it!

[KatyaR]

39. Can we have an amnesty program?

Surely one of you good East Coast DUers would sponsor me to move from Oklahoma to New England. Please? I'm desperate!

[dooner]

42. made me laugh

after months of hearing paranoid/crazy crap from republican relatives about how Obama has destroyed our country,
some of us really need comic relief.

[yashoo]

43. it was close but...

relieved we're keeping Disney World!

[Blue_In_AK]

44. Not this shit again...

[Fawke Em]

48. I get Vanderbilt, NC State, the Research Triangle and the new mood.

I'm so damn tired of this shit, I called my brand new Dem state House member, a personal friend of mine, who won a gerrymandered district in Knoxville that was supposed to go red and I said, "how do we do this over and over and over again."

She said: stop blaming the Party and get out and work.

Jeezus Christe on a cracker, she got the former football coach and Morgan Freeman to work for her.

I said, "I want to ask Jim Messina to come down here and teach me to crunch numbers!" She said, "Let's do it."

So.... what's Messina's email. I'll help him start taking the South.

[bluestate10]

53. We may have to make a trade for Florida. I suggest that we invade Utah, take it, then trade it back

for the Sunshine State, minus Rick Scott and the legislature.

[Egalitarian Thug]

54. In all the inevitable swooning and outrage this joke provokes every time it's posted,

we never hear why the red-state-liberals insist on remaining where they are not wanted, nor appreciated.

The facts, as they have been pointed out again and again, are that if there was a split, we would be far better off without these bastions of hate and bigotry. The liberal states drive this nation, the conservative states are the flat tires that slow us down and pull us off the road.

That does not mean that everything or everyone in a red state is bad, nor is the inverse true (it was an industry firmly ensconced in a very blue state that collapsed the global economy).

[Fumesucker]

63. And you have yet to address the fact that yours is a moronically simplistic view of politics in USA

[Egalitarian Thug]

64. I guess this one falls under the outrage category. Still waiting for an answer... n/t

[Fumesucker]

66. Answer to what? I don't see any question marks in your post I was replying to

It's just a stupid meme, there are blue areas in most of the "red states", my own state voted for Romney and yet there are large patches of blue on the map in my state.

It's every bit as stupid when DUers pull this shit as when the Freepers talk about secession.

[Egalitarian Thug]

69. "why the red-state-liberals insist on remaining where they are not wanted, nor appreciated."

It was written as an observation of a consistent reaction. I've lived in two reliably red states and got out of both of them. I currently live in another somewhat less reactionary state (Nevada is more about stealing than conservatism) and have no intention of remaining here either. It has never for a moment crossed my mind that this is where I want to stay and took extreme circumstances to get me here at all.

There are too many Americans that are too willing to compromise their morals in exchange for ease. That' and televised ignorance are why we are the world's biggest suckers. We work like donkeys for scraps because the carrot of "making it someday" is dangled in front of us.

[Fumesucker]

71. There's lots of reasons, family obligations and connections, money, money, money.

I've picked up and moved from one state to another several times in my life, it's always been expensive and hasn't always worked out like I thought it was going to.

I've also started over from scratch three times in my life after losing everything, once in a house fire, once from a major burglary and once again most recently from divorce, I'm too old to do that shit now.

I don't even have a car any more, kind of hard to move across country on a bicycle if you plan on taking much with you.

[Kablooie]

55. We get Disneyland and they get Disney World. (But we still invent all the new rides.)

[Zorra]

73. Maximum good, and minimum bad. Sign me up. nt

[Eddie Haskell]

76. You get Citizens United. We get Citizens Enlightened.

[cordelia]

77. This divisive shit wasn't funny the first time, and it sure as hell isn't

the thousandth time I've seen it.

[trailmonkee]

81. i don't like this... reminds me of all that weird stuff i see from crazy righties

Kind of has a bad vibe, sorry

I'm surprised people are recommending this and posting positive comments?