In light of the fact that the nation is broke, and the Post Office is going to start selling clothes
President Obama has asked the other agencies for suggestions to bring in more revenue. Some of the revenue enhancers they came up with are as follows:
Dept of Justice will begin selling a series of buttons, T–Shirts, and other memorabilia in their gift shop inscribed with the words , “No Justice, No Peace. Know Justice, Know Peace.” The gift shop will also carry Monopoly Games which include extra “Get Out of Jail Free” cards if you work on Wall St. or are a member of Congress.
SCOTUS- Produce a TV show “Survivor- SCOTUS Edition. Each week the Public gets to vote one Justice off the Bench until all the Conservative Justices are gone. A Bonus will be awarded if the audience predicts correctly to vote Scalia off the “island”, first.
The CIA will be selling a series of instructional tapes for parents on how to modify child behavior
The Marines will be conducting Boot Camps (The Biggest Loser version) for those who need a Jillian Michaels type in your face trainer, to get our obese nation in shape or for those who just want to experience what military life is like.
Defense Dept – Conducting a Fire Sale on surplus drones. Be the first to get one for your neighbor on the corner with the 4 pit bulls that keep getting out.
FDA conduct a series of information classes on food safety with a special chapter on “ Why does my steak taste like horsemeat?”
Health and Human Svcs is licensing the word Obamacare
Federal Reserve is going to begin printing and selling Platinum trillion dollar coins at a huge discount
Dept of Education will be launching a reality show entitled “Why My Honey Boo Boo Can’t Read”
State Dept. a board game called Where’s Burma? A board game of European, Asia and African countries that cease to exist. Be the first on your block to get the latest addition which excludes Syria.
FAA – Selling an App which lets you see inside the control tower at your flight destination to see if the Air Traffic Controller on duty is awake.
TSA – Has put together a travel guide book including chapters on “How many ounces can you fit in a 4 ounce bottle”, and “What to do when you’re late for your flight and discover you’re still wearing your concealed Glock.
EPA will publish a book entitled, “Yes that water that ignites coming out your faucet is safe and other questions you were afraid to ask”.
White House decided to start a Swear Jar in which John McCain has to put a dollar in every time he or Lindsey Graham mentions Benghazi.
Any additional ideas are certainly welcome.
