New Rand Paul op ed opens with "Now is the winter of our discontent"

[elehhhhna]

wraps up with "my kingdom for a horse." Swears he wrote every word of it hisownself.

[Tarheel_Dem]

1. !!!

[JohnnyLib2]

2. Uh oh. Are you good at dueling?

[pinboy3niner]

3. I kinda liked his preface: "Call me Ishmael"

[elehhhhna]

5. GOOD ONE!

[boston bean]

4. He got fired from his weekly column for the

Washington Times.

It's go to be pretty bad for one to get fired for lacking journalistic integrity from that rag.

Edit damn autocorrect changed fired to gored... Almost worked just as well.

[pinboy3niner]

6. Rand Paul just got a *lightbulb* from your post

"Damn you, Autocorrect!"

[boston bean]

7. LMAO!!

[BlueToTheBone]

12. It was a goring! Indeed. To be fired from the Mooney

Times! x 1000 It is so delicious.

[NuclearDem]

8. Well, Veteran's Day is coming up.

Maybe he'll tell the story of a 1998 American epic war film set during the invasion of Normandy during World War II.

[Dash87]

9. "It was the best of times. It was the worst of times."

[JimboBillyBubbaBob]

10. This do sound...

...familiar!

[nolabear]

11. He could master mashups.."My fellow Americans, it was the best of times, it was the worst of times."

[boston bean]

14. He once wrote the pledge of god bless America

I pledge allegiance to the flag, god bless America
And to the republic, land that I love
One nation with the light from above.
Indivisible from the prairies to the ocean. Amen!

He was in awe of himself.

[pinboy3niner]

16. I love his rendition of Amazing Gracie Mansion

[boston bean]

18. You know that Exile song, I'm going to kiss you all over? Well,

Rand Paul sued Exile claiming they riffed off his work, "I'm going to kiss you on the nose".

His tune went like this:

I'm going to kiss you on the nose
So blow it again
I'm going to kiss you the nose
So pleeeeeease blow it again. So pleeeeeease blow it agaaain.

He lost the suit.

[Eleanors38]

21. More like Charlie Manson.

[pinboy3niner]

23. That is apt, isn't it?

[JoePhilly]

13. He plagiarized dueling msnbc hosts from Zell Miller

[Link Speed]

15. Picky, picky, picky...

You know what they say about a room full of Chimpanzees with typewriters.

At the risk of sounding (whatever) as a songwriter, I think you have the most artistic username on this site. I smile every time I see it. No matter the spelling - Helena, Elena, Lei'lain'ia, Lalena, elehhhhna, I see it as one of the most beautiful and poetic names in any language.

I can only suppose that is your real name. If not, please allow me a bit of poetic license.

[rug]

17. It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

[boston bean]

19. And he added this to that for good measure

[shraby]

20. Duzy!!!!!!!!!!

[nyquil_man]

22. Here's a longer excerpt:

On a September morning, in the small town of Calumet, Colorado, a local high school teacher pauses when he sees Russian paratroopers landing in a nearby field. The paratroopers open fire when the teacher confronts them. Pandemonium follows as students flee amid heavy gunfire. In downtown Calumet, Cuban and Soviet troops are trying to impose order after a hasty occupation. Cuban Colonel Bella instructs the KGB to go to a local sporting goods store and obtain the records of the store's gun sales on the ATF's Form 4473, which lists citizens who have purchased firearms.

Brothers Jed and Matt Eckert, along with their friends Robert, Danny, Daryl, and Aardvark, flee into the wilderness after hastily equipping themselves at a sporting goods store owned by Robert's father. While on the way to the mountains, they run into a Russian roadblock, but are saved by an attacking U.S. Army helicopter gunship. After several weeks in the forest, they sneak back into town; Jed and Matt learn that their father is being held in a re-education camp. They visit the site and speak to him through the fence; Mr. Eckert orders his sons to "avenge" his inevitable death.

Compelling stuff. Makes a great point because liberty.

[pinboy3niner]

25. The earlier draft featuring his brother Daryl and his other brother Daryl wasn't bad either

[Fumesucker]

24. "It was a dark and stormy night" n/t

[WCGreen]

26. And in between...

Not so much...

[muriel_volestrangler]

27. "One other thing I should probably tell you, because if I don't they will probably be saying this...

...about me, too. We did get something, a gift, after the election.

A man down in Texas heard Kelley on the radio mention that our two youngsters would like to have a dog, and, believe it or not, the day we left before this campaign trip we got a message from Union Station in Baltimore, saying they had a package for us. We went down to get it. You know what it was?

It was a little cocker spaniel dog, in a crate that he had sent all the way from Texas, black and white, spotted, and our little girl Tricia boy Robert, the six year old (can an intern check how old he is for me?), named it Checkers.

And you know, the kids, like all kids, loved the dog, and I just want to say this, right now, that regardless of what they say about it, we are going to keep it."

Note to ed: is rail travel a bit old-fashioned now? Should we update that to an airport? Ahh, what the hell, they still buy it in Atlas Shrugged, and those readers are my marks. Leave it in.

[Cresent City Kid]

28. Highlight - Ctrl+C - Place cursor - Ctrl+V

This writing thing is a breeze!

[ananda]

29. It was a dark and stormy night ...

... when Maddow showed my tale full of sound and fury,
signifying nothing.

[ananda]

30. And remember the plagiarism of Henry Clay in Steinbeck's book...

... The Winter of Our Discontent ???

Double whammy!