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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsSpace robot researcher seeking room in pterodactyl-free zone (near Evansdale or in Southpark)
http://morgantown.craigslist.org/sha/4335210695.htmlGreetings, Morgantownians. I have traveled long and far from a place called Austin, and I bring gifts of breakfast tacos and irony. I came here in order to teach space robots how to see. I have a Ph.D. in molecular biology, I work in aerospace engineering, I moved here in January, and I'm about to turn thirty.
I found a lovely house in South Park, but the person who subleased it to me either (a) seems to have a very bad memory and a deep and creative fantasy life, or (b) is a compulsive liar. So I have to find a new place by May 10th, and roommate(s).
Here is a list of things about other things, because: Things! Ranked in order of importance, obviously.
* I have a deep and abiding apprehension about pterodactyls. I would prefer to live in a neighborhood free of flying dinosaurs (except birds, birds are mostly okay).
* I have excellent skills at giving punny names to animals. My six chickens still live in Austin, and they are named Captain Peckhard (pronounced 'Picard'), Cluck Norris, Hen Solo, Buffy Orpington the Vampire Slayer, Ernestine Heningway (who turned out to be a rooster and now lives happily ever after on a farm with a yurt), Eggenvector, T. Boone Peckens, and Gregory Peck. If you counted more than six it's because a family of raccoons carried off some of them. :,(
<snip>
I found a lovely house in South Park, but the person who subleased it to me either (a) seems to have a very bad memory and a deep and creative fantasy life, or (b) is a compulsive liar. So I have to find a new place by May 10th, and roommate(s).
Here is a list of things about other things, because: Things! Ranked in order of importance, obviously.
* I have a deep and abiding apprehension about pterodactyls. I would prefer to live in a neighborhood free of flying dinosaurs (except birds, birds are mostly okay).
* I have excellent skills at giving punny names to animals. My six chickens still live in Austin, and they are named Captain Peckhard (pronounced 'Picard'), Cluck Norris, Hen Solo, Buffy Orpington the Vampire Slayer, Ernestine Heningway (who turned out to be a rooster and now lives happily ever after on a farm with a yurt), Eggenvector, T. Boone Peckens, and Gregory Peck. If you counted more than six it's because a family of raccoons carried off some of them. :,(
<snip>
Read the rest of this hilarious ad at the link.
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Space robot researcher seeking room in pterodactyl-free zone (near Evansdale or in Southpark) (Original Post)
Fumesucker
Feb 2014
OP
LuvNewcastle
(16,856 posts)1. I don't know if I'd want him for a roommate, but I'd like to meet him.
Enthusiast
(50,983 posts)2. That guy is some kind of a nut!
Everyone knows that pterodactyls are extinct.
JHB
(37,162 posts)3. That's just what they WANT you to think!
They're the real reason behind the decline of bee populations, bees being the mortal enemies of pterodactyls (though ironically, bees are pteranodon-friendly)!
Enthusiast
(50,983 posts)6. That is now my favorite video, evah!