Can You Pass Alabama’s New School Safety Test?

[bondwooley]

Alabama has figured out a sure-fire plan to thwart evildoers that barge into their schools:

The principal of Alabama’s W.F. Burns Middle School has asked parents to send each of their kids to school with an 8-ounce canned item — to throw at the heads of any intruders. “If somebody is going to force their way through,” she said, “then as the last resort you would start throwing any objects you could get your hands on.”

Such as cans of corn and peas.

Yep. Canned goods are now a student's first line of defense against maniacs with guns. And they're taking it seriously.

If you want to find out if you're qualified for school safety in Alabama, take the test.

(Test, sources and full story at http://lesterandcharlie.com/2015/01/15/are-you-prepared-for-alabamas-school-safety-plan/)

[braddy]

1. Before MREs we used to eat out of cans in the Army, I guess we were better armed than I thought.

[jmowreader]

12. One of my buddies in wiretapping school would agree with you

This guy chucked a can of beans & franks at a Special Forces guy during a field exercise...he hit the snake-eater in the head so hard they had to evacuate the guy.

[randys1]

2. Better than suggesting they all have guns or something ludicrous like that...

Or better than arming the teachers

[Savannahmann]

3. I scored 100%.

[SamKnause]

8. You answered throw a can of corn on every question ??

I scored 0.

[hifiguy]

4. Is it something in the water down there or what?

This kind of stupid burns like a phosphorus grenade.

[bondwooley]

5. It's not in the water

it's in the canned corn.

[SamKnause]

6. Is this a joke ?

I scored 0 on the quiz.

When it showed your score, it gave the correct answers.

The answer to every question was throw a can of corn.

Has anyone else taken the quiz ???

[Brother Buzz]

7. Tagging some ass with a can of creamed corn is going to open the school district to a lawsuit

Cruel and unusual punishment

I'm just saying

[tkmorris]

10. Nah, that won't happen

It isn't punishment if done in the process of defending yourself from someone with nefarious intent.

I can guarantee however that these kids will be smacking each other up side the head with cans of tomato paste within a week.

[Brother Buzz]

13. I read in the Geneva Conventions canned creamed corn is specifically prohibited

To reiterate: Cruel and unusual punishment

[bondwooley]

15. Which creamed corn?

DelMonte or Green Giant?

[Brother Buzz]

18. I doesn't matter, all that toxic shit comes out of the same rusty tank....

located inside the infamous Area 51

[DawgHouse]

9. I just can't imagine putting a can of green beans in my child's backpack

Last edited Thu Jan 15, 2015, 10:24 PM - Edit history (1)

and telling him, "Now, remember. If the bad guys try to bust down your classroom door, just bust them upside the head with this can of beans."

I think his response would be "What? What bad guys?"

[bondwooley]

16. LOL

[hunter]

11. We just had "Duck and Cover"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duck_and_cover

Later it was called "Duck and cover and kiss your ass good-bye."

[oberliner]

14. Your post is completely misrepresenting the content of the article

You wrote:

"Yep. Canned goods are now a student's first line of defense against maniacs with guns. And they're taking it seriously."

It is actually the "last resort" as the article states.

It's a part of a program supported by the US Dept of Education (and promoted by VP Biden)

Lockdown is no Longer Enough!

“There are three basic options: run, hide, or fight. You can run away from the shooter, seek a secure place where you can hide and/or deny the shooter access, or incapacitate the shooter to survive and protect others from harm.” “If running is not a safe option, hide in as safe a place as possible. Students and staff should be trained to hide in a location where the walls might be thicker and have fewer windows. In addition: Hide along the wall closest to the exit but out of the view from the hallway (allowing for an ambush of the shooter and for possible escape if the shooter enters the room).” MULTIPLE RESPONSE OPTIONS NEEDED “As the situation develops, it is possible that students and staff will need to use more than one option.” THOSE IN HARMS WAY SHOULD MAKE THEIR OWN DECISIONS “While they should follow the plan and any instructions given during an incident, often they will have to rely on their own judgment to decide which option will best protect lives.”

http://www.alicetraining.com/what-we-do/alice-componets/k-12/

One of the suggestions included is for the students to have something with them in the worst case scenario of the shooter breaking through and getting into the barricaded room where they are hiding.

[Aristus]

17. Yes.

I just stay out of Alabama.

Test: passed.