New Yorker: Oregon Militia’s Updated Supplies Wish List
In response to recent shipments of “supplies,” here is a new list of requests issued by militia leaders in Oregon:
For people to stop referring to us as the “Oregon militia.” We now want to be known as “Bald Eagle Extreme Gang Patriots Constitution Lovers of the U.S. of A.”
A tattoo gun
A tattoo artist who can tattoo “Bald Eagle Extreme Gang Patriots Constitution Lovers of the U.S. of A.” on all of our backs
A machine that allows us to talk to and understand the birds on the wildlife refuge in case we get lonely
Sleeping bags with built-in alarm clocks that make bald-eagle noises
Fewer dildos
Camouflage pants
Camouflage shirts
Camouflage cigarettes that can’t be seen at night
more:
http://www.newyorker.com/humor/daily-shouts/oregon-militias-updated-supplies-wish-list
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