Dustin Hoffman sexually harrassed me when I was 17
Source: Hollywood Reporter
"This is a story I've told so often I'm sometimes surprised when someone I know hasn't heard it. It begins, "Dustin Hoffman sexually harassed me when I was 17." Then I give the details: When I was a senior in high school in New York City, interning as a production assistant on the set of the Death of a Salesman TV film, he asked me to give him a foot massage my first day on set; I did.
He was openly flirtatious, he grabbed my ass, he talked about sex to me and in front of me. One morning I went to his dressing room to take his breakfast order; he looked at me and grinned, taking his time. Then he said, "I'll have a hard-boiled egg
and a soft-boiled clitoris." His entourage burst out laughing. I left, speechless. Then I went to the bathroom and cried."
Read more: http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/features/dustin-hoffman-sexually-harassed-me-i-was-17-guest-column-1053466
Add Hoffman to the list. She was 17. He was 48. He was also 5 years into his second marriage.
nocalflea
(1,387 posts)How do you treat someone else's daughter this way ?
I don't think I could've kept my composure in front of him.
Doodley
(10,452 posts)xor
(1,204 posts)harassment and assault. Had it been dealt with correctly then we wouldn't see things going down the way they are happening now.
Liberalagogo
(1,770 posts)but the entertainment industry has been like this since it began as an industry.
Hopefully, everyone standing up for themselves openly will bring about permanent change.
FarPoint
(13,695 posts)I will pay attention when charges are filed...there is a process....use it I say.
Doodley
(10,452 posts)There are sexual predators in every industry. The only difference is Dustin Hoffman or Kevin Spacey, etc., are household names. Stories about them are newsworthy. The boss at the local bank or the office manager - nobody in the media is interested. If this is really the worst allegation about Dustin Hoffman, then he is a better man than millions of others. That is not to defend him, but to point out that this is really a non-story when you hold it up to workplace harassment that goes on every day.
pnwmom
(109,629 posts)MontanaMama
(24,080 posts)Except I believe it.
TygrBright
(20,987 posts)In part, because the author is both so revelatory of the ambiguity of the experience (at the time) for her, and so reflective of the larger context it shaped for her and her experience of being a second-class human being- someone whose value is to some extent predicated on their sexual availability.
And in part, because the final footnote about Hoffman's response is going to presage so many, many other celebs of his generation as they are called on what was "normal and okay" back then. He may or may not think more deeply into it, and come to a more profound sense of the harm that he unwittingly did. But something like that is going to be heard, over and over and over again.
And the ability of girls and women to find a sense of validation and even pleasure in being objectified, to cooperate in their own objectification- needs to be understood by the assholes who think "but she acted like she liked it!" is a valid defense. Survival mechanisms are just that: survival mechanisms.
It's a messy time.
sadly,
Bright
TexasBushwhacker
(20,726 posts)It was NEVER okay. At the time, Hoffman had 2 teenage daughters from his first marriage, which makes it that much more creepy.
MountCleaners
(1,148 posts)I almost majored in theater in college. I'm glad I didn't go into acting!! I don't handle sexual harassment well. We deal with our "problems" differently on the south side of Chicago.
Botany
(72,641 posts)Le Gaucher
(1,547 posts)She hates it more than you will ever know
Woe woe woe woe woe woe
FakeNoose
(35,974 posts)Most men wouldn't consider this sexual harrassment though.
This is "locker room talk" as Trump would say. Women are expected to grin and be good sports about it. Most men think that if penetration didn't happen, it's not sexual harrassment.
Guilded Lilly
(5,591 posts)behavior of well known males.
Well known names because someone saying, hey, my immediate boss (when I was 18, 20, 24, 26, 30, 40, etc etc), Joe Schmoe used to leer at me and make highly suggestive moves on me and practice abusive sexual behavior that he felt entitled to just because I am a female, is not news. It is daily life for any female in any workplace, school, playground.
It is sad, infuriating, but not surprising and certainly not exclusive of one profession.
It is a male problem.
It is a society problem.
It is a mental problem.
It is an accountability problem.
It is a problem of generations of enabling and acceptance of gross and improper language and aggressive physical behavior of certain types, and a LOT, of men objectifying and disrespecting females...or other young vulnerable males.
In a society that has bred sexual predators in positions of power in religion and done nothing...has condoned shit for brains office environment crudeness and accepted, ignorant, base, gender abuses...in a world that excuses crap behavior from male youth because tsk tsk *boys will be boys*...expect thousands of revelations. Most of them very true.
This past political season brought home this numbingly vomitous and hideous social problem that is STILL being vilely practiced.
Until males are held accountable, challenged and refuted for it, it will continue.
It is going to be a very ugly transition with a ton of disappointments, sadness, adjustments, repercussions.
But it is well past time to create change.
TexasBushwhacker
(20,726 posts)"I have the utmost respect for women and feel terrible that anything I might have done could have put her in an uncomfortable situation. I am sorry. It is not reflective of who I am."
I'm sick of this "it's not who I am" bullshit. Yes, actually it is who you are. "I might have done"? How about just say "I did".
Swagman
(1,934 posts)that flew out the window and just because someone is part of Hollywood does not mean they are guilty or innocent or should be considered a cause of a problem.