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Sun Oct 18, 2020, 04:24 PM

No, I Won't Agree To Disagree. You're Just Wrong

To Whom It May Concern,

We recently found ourselves in a now-familiar location: hopelessly stuck in an unnavigable impasse on our respective paths, unable to find a way forward. And, as in so many times before, when the friction became too great and the exchange too heated and the tension too uncomfortable, you dropped an all-too-familiar final salvo designed to stop conversation and temporarily defuse the situation:

“We’re just going to have to agree to disagree.”

I disagree.

I refuse these terms.

Such a concession assumes that we both have equally valid opinions, that we’re each mutually declaring those opinions not so divergent that they cannot be abided; that our relationship is of greater value than the differences—but that isn’t exactly true for me.

We don’t just disagree here—you’re wrong.

https://johnpavlovitz.com/2020/10/18/no-i-wont-agree-to-disagree-youre-just-wrong/

✌🏻



17 replies, 1607 views

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Arrow 17 replies Author Time Post
Reply No, I Won't Agree To Disagree. You're Just Wrong (Original post)
dweller Oct 18 OP
TwilightZone Oct 18 #1
alwaysinasnit Oct 18 #2
MontanaMama Oct 18 #3
SunSeeker Oct 18 #9
Karma13612 Oct 18 #11
SunSeeker Oct 18 #12
OldBaldy1701E Oct 19 #15
Karma13612 Oct 19 #17
Karma13612 Oct 18 #13
Girard442 Oct 18 #4
mopinko Oct 18 #5
dweller Oct 18 #7
druidity33 Oct 18 #6
luv2fly Oct 18 #8
OldBaldy1701E Oct 19 #16
Karma13612 Oct 18 #10
Solly Mack Oct 18 #14

Response to dweller (Original post)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 04:30 PM

1. It's up there with "everyone is entitled to their opinion"

Nope. If one's statement is intentionally based on false information, it's a lie, not an opinion.

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Response to dweller (Original post)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 04:34 PM

2. To me, this was John Pavlovitz' best essay so far. Irreconcilable differences.

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Response to dweller (Original post)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 04:39 PM

3. Wholeheartedly agree dweller.

I just now this very minute told my mother-in-law that we would not be attending her annual holiday party. While she puts on a lovely event, she’s got kids (my husband’s siblings) who do not believe Covid is a thing to worry about. I was told that “we all have to die of something, if Covid is that something, so be it. It’s no different from the flu.” Fuck these people. I’m done with them. I refuse to jeopardize my life or that of my husband and son for people who don’t believe in facts. I will not miss my brother in law extolling the virtues of the pResident being such a brilliant tell it like it is businessman just to get a reaction out of me.

ETA: This might be the best essay I’ve ever read by John Pavlovitz. It explains the reasons why simply disagreeing with these people is unacceptable.

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Response to MontanaMama (Reply #3)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 09:19 PM

9. We skipped Easter Dinner with my Trumper in-laws because of Covid-19.

It was the best Easter we'd had in years. Just me, my husband and my son. No assholes spouting abhorent views, just us extoling the virtues of my husband's perfectly cooked prime rib and creamed corn. Then laying around together on the couch, stuffed to the gills, in stretchy sweats and t-shurts. Pure bliss and relaxation. Now I'm looking forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas too, without them. I never want to go back to putting up with that bullshit, even after the pandemic.

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Response to SunSeeker (Reply #9)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 09:25 PM

11. A silver lining.

Sometimes bad things are the beginning of meaningful change.

Lets hope it happens on a grand scale.

COVID-19 is our rock bottom.
We can begin anew as we recover with a new President, a new White House, a new Senate and a stronger House of Representatives.



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Response to Karma13612 (Reply #11)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 09:28 PM

12. Indeed. Cheers!

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Response to Karma13612 (Reply #11)

Mon Oct 19, 2020, 06:42 AM

15. I sincerely hope so

I don't think we have hit rock bottom yet, but I hope you are correct in that this is as far as we 'drop'. Also, 'beginning anew' doesn't seem to be the desire of most people. They want things to go 'back to normal'. Having lived through the 'normal' of the past five decades, I don't want to 'go back' to anything. How can anyone call themselves a progressive and still keep saying this?

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Response to OldBaldy1701E (Reply #15)

Mon Oct 19, 2020, 07:59 AM

17. Spot on

I was born in ‘54 and started working in ‘78.
I retired in march 2019. Just one year before I was officially allowed to.

During my working years, I never really got ahead financially and blamed myself until I became more familiar with the concept of stagnant wages and the shrinking of the middle class. I changed professions a few times which always seemed to reset my earning power. Employers never seemed to give me credit for previous work experience and education. Some of this was my fault, but not all of it. Being female also didn’t help.

Now I understand that despite my hard work, this was actually a full fledged conservative plan to limit wealth to the top 1%.

And most recently, with the 99% assured seating of bratty Barrett to the SCOTUS, I was reading that this 6-3 conservative majority will keep the country under conservative life-style, lacking in improved social programs and climate control, etc for ‘at least a few decades’.

So, my entire life has witnessed the destruction of what was potentially a great progressive country.

Disgusting, vile, painful, heartless, soul crushing.
I certainly hope the next generation can see that things need to flippin’ change.

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Response to MontanaMama (Reply #3)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 09:28 PM

13. In 'honor' of your mother-in-law

Consider volunteering at a shelter, or maybe help wrap Christmas Gifts for the needy, or some other Covid-friendly activity.

And let her know that is what you are doing, instead of going to her party.

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Response to dweller (Original post)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 04:50 PM

4. So...should we cross the river by finding a bridge or try a "Fast & Furious" jump?

Y'know, people can have different opinions about these things.

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Response to dweller (Original post)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 05:00 PM

5. love this guy. follow him on twitter.

if you tweet, you should, too.

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Response to mopinko (Reply #5)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 05:03 PM

7. I drop in on his website

along the way ... today found this waiting
timely

✌🏻

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Response to dweller (Original post)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 05:01 PM

6. K&R, nt.

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Response to dweller (Original post)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 06:25 PM

8. Love this

But I suspect the people we all wish MIGHT or SHOULD read it would find it too long with way too many words requiring a dictionary.

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Response to luv2fly (Reply #8)

Mon Oct 19, 2020, 06:43 AM

16. The people who need to read this...

cannot even read your sentence, much less an entire missive!

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Response to dweller (Original post)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 09:19 PM

10. Excellent! Thanks for the link! ...nt

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Response to dweller (Original post)

Sun Oct 18, 2020, 11:51 PM

14. K&R

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