Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

MarianJack

(10,237 posts)
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 07:59 PM Aug 2018

I brought Curly's ashes home last night.

When I got into the car I held the little box to my heart and wept. I learned 50+ years ago that when you have pets, they WILL eventually get sick, get old and die. But that doesn't make it any easier when they do.

I still feel this enormous hole in my heart. I believe that this death has hurt me more than any other pet's loss in my life. I'm not going nearly as far as this, but I remember in 1963 when my grandfather's dog of 22 years, Pepper, died, he lost all will to live. I often heard my mom and aunts & uncles recounting hearing Grand Pop saying that his dog was dead and he didn't want to live anymore. He was gone within a few months. I certainly don't go as far as that. In fact, I want to get another doggie again BECAUSE of how much I love Curly.

But DAMN, this still hurts like Hell. I didn't know that I could cry this much in 5 years, let alone 5 days! I keep remembering how VP Biden saying how eventually the memory will bring the smile before it brings the tear. I know that this will eventually come, but God damn, it hurts now.

I love and miss my little boy.

Thanks for reading.

PEACE!

RESIST!

48 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
I brought Curly's ashes home last night. (Original Post) MarianJack Aug 2018 OP
I'm so sorry janterry Aug 2018 #1
And he always will be. MarianJack Aug 2018 #2
My heart hurts with yours. dhol82 Aug 2018 #3
Thank you MarianJack Aug 2018 #9
My heart hurts for you MarianJack. GemDigger Aug 2018 #4
Eventually,... MarianJack Aug 2018 #12
R.I.P Curly.. Permanut Aug 2018 #5
Soon for another doggie. MarianJack Aug 2018 #7
As George Carlin said, life is just a series of dogs Major Nikon Aug 2018 #6
My son made two promises to me. MarianJack Aug 2018 #8
You have an amazingly wonderful son! dhol82 Aug 2018 #10
Yes I do, thanks. MarianJack Aug 2018 #20
We have my in-laws dog Major Nikon Aug 2018 #15
They are SO loyal MarianJack Aug 2018 #21
My heart absolutely aches for you. Ohiogal Aug 2018 #11
I certainly will! MarianJack Aug 2018 #14
I'm so sorry. Please remember that Curly lives forever spooky3 Aug 2018 #13
He certainly does. MarianJack Aug 2018 #17
Aw, I can imagine what you feel. They really secondwind Aug 2018 #16
Very loved family MarianJack Aug 2018 #18
My heart goes to you. Doreen Aug 2018 #19
It seems they always go too early. MarianJack Aug 2018 #22
My Lunar only lived for 8 years and my Shultz for only 6. Doreen Aug 2018 #24
Any time is too soon. MarianJack Aug 2018 #26
I lost my beloved dog last October madaboutharry Aug 2018 #23
I miss him so much! MarianJack Aug 2018 #25
I know how you're hurting. I've had dozens of dogs during my sinkingfeeling Aug 2018 #27
I am sorry for your loss Moostache Aug 2018 #28
I'm sorry for your loss. We had to put down our little broken coat Jack Russell last year and I jalan48 Aug 2018 #29
This is so difficult. Wishing you much peace. Mrs. Overall Aug 2018 #30
He's been reincarnated Ligyron Aug 2018 #31
Aw, I'm sorry. I know, it's shocking how much it hurts to lose a beloved pet. pnwmom Aug 2018 #32
So sorry for your loss. FuzzyRabbit Aug 2018 #33
It only hurts because you love so much Roy Rolling Aug 2018 #34
You'll always miss them leanforward Aug 2018 #35
Love you and Curly hold him close Corvo Bianco Aug 2018 #36
On losing a beloved pet The Wizard Aug 2018 #37
actually heaven05 Aug 2018 #41
All my pets The Wizard Aug 2018 #45
yep, it does hurt heaven05 Aug 2018 #38
A lot of love for you Marian, it's hard, hurts. Brogrizzly Aug 2018 #39
So sorry MFM008 Aug 2018 #40
So sorry for your loss orangecrush Aug 2018 #42
Our pet babies give so much and ask for so little in return. Totally Tunsie Aug 2018 #43
Sooooo sorry MJ. Know exactly how you feel. This Laura PourMeADrink Aug 2018 #44
I was thinking about Curly BigmanPigman Aug 2018 #46
Along with my Mom's ashes JPK Aug 2018 #47
He knew you loved him...thank you for showing strength Demonaut Aug 2018 #48

GemDigger

(4,305 posts)
4. My heart hurts for you MarianJack.
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:04 PM
Aug 2018

I hope your little Curly brings the right dog to take his place to your attention.

Permanut

(5,602 posts)
5. R.I.P Curly..
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:05 PM
Aug 2018

This post from your human companion shows how loved you were.

I know the road you are walking; I have Murphy's ashes with me on the bookshelf as I type this. Thing is, I took some extra left over food to the shelter after I lost Murphy, and there was Joey waiting for me. He rescued me, and now he is helping me to type this. These little creatures are really special.

Major Nikon

(36,827 posts)
6. As George Carlin said, life is just a series of dogs
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:08 PM
Aug 2018

I mourn every one of them I’ve lost. Some more than others. As I get closer to the end I wonder if one of mine will mourn me instead one day.

MarianJack

(10,237 posts)
8. My son made two promises to me.
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:13 PM
Aug 2018

First, when we go, He'll scatter a vial of each of our ashes where we have our pets' ashes buried.

Second, he'll take care of our surviving pets.

RESIST!

Major Nikon

(36,827 posts)
15. We have my in-laws dog
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:19 PM
Aug 2018

She is old and probably won’t see another summer. She still follows me around the house even though getting up takes more effort.

Doreen

(11,686 posts)
19. My heart goes to you.
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:27 PM
Aug 2018

I am still heart broken about two of my animals the most. One was a very special cat Lunar who helped prevent me from dying and the other was my service dog Shultz who made my life easier and protected me. They both died to early.

MarianJack

(10,237 posts)
22. It seems they always go too early.
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:34 PM
Aug 2018

I certainly expected to have Curly for another 2 or 3 years.

RESIST!

Doreen

(11,686 posts)
24. My Lunar only lived for 8 years and my Shultz for only 6.
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:42 PM
Aug 2018

They should have lived for many years more. Even Shultz being a German Shepherd died to soon. then again anytime is to soon.

madaboutharry

(40,209 posts)
23. I lost my beloved dog last October
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:39 PM
Aug 2018

His ashes are in a little rosewood box on the fireplace mantel. Sometimes I just hold it. I miss him every day.

I’m sorry, I know how it feels.

sinkingfeeling

(51,454 posts)
27. I know how you're hurting. I've had dozens of dogs during my
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:52 PM
Aug 2018

70 years, but there were 2 or 3 that I had a special bond with. One was a survivor of multiple illnesses, including diabetes. One was my 'soul mate'. One I saved from drowning as a pup. Their deaths were almost unbearable. I still cry on the anniversaries of their passing...22, 14, and 10 years later.

Hugs.

Moostache

(9,895 posts)
28. I am sorry for your loss
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 08:58 PM
Aug 2018

I know how hard it is to say goodbye, my last "special kitty" to cross the rainbow bridge is STILL hard on me 2 years later (partly because we only had him for barely 2 years after saving him from being abandoned in a box in the woods)...I do smile more now than get sad thinking of him, so it does get better...

I hope your memories are stronger, and faster, than the grief...in the mean time thank you for providing a safe and happy life for Curly...

jalan48

(13,863 posts)
29. I'm sorry for your loss. We had to put down our little broken coat Jack Russell last year and I
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 09:33 PM
Aug 2018

still miss him. Our pets are such good friends.

FuzzyRabbit

(1,967 posts)
33. So sorry for your loss.
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 09:53 PM
Aug 2018

We miss our furry family members as much, and sometimes more, than our people family members.

I hope you find your next four legged friend soon. I am sure he or she will bring you as much joy as Curley did.

Roy Rolling

(6,917 posts)
34. It only hurts because you love so much
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 09:54 PM
Aug 2018

It is the side-effect of being the kind person Curly loved, too. It hurts. But time will replace those tears.

If you were an a**hole, it wouldn't hurt at all. Curly knew that.

The Wizard

(12,545 posts)
37. On losing a beloved pet
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 10:09 PM
Aug 2018

On January 4, 1993, the cat in this book and the books that preceded it was put to sleep in Kerrville, Texas, by DR. W.H. Hoegemeyer and myself. Cuddles was fourteen years old, a respectable age. She was as close to me as any human being I have ever known.
Cuddles and I spent many years together, both in New York, where I found her as a little kitten on the street in Chinatown, and later on the ranch in Texas. She was always with me, on the table, on the bed, by the fireplace, beside the typewriter, on top of my suitcase when I returned from a trip.
I dug Cuddles' grave with a silver spade, in the little garden by the stream behind the old green trailer where both of us lived in the summertime. Her burial shroud was my old New York sweatshirt and in the grave with her is a can of tuna and a cigar.
A few days ago I received a sympathy note from Bill Hoegemeyer, the veterinarian. It opened with a verse by Irving Townsend: "We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own live within a fragile circle…"
Now as I write this, on a gray winter day by the fireside, I can almost feel her light tread moving from my head and my heart down through my fingertips to the keys of the typewriter. People may surprise you with unexpected kindness. Dogs have a depth of loyalty that we often seem unworthy of. But the love of a cat is a blessing, a privilege in this world.
They say when you die and go to heaven all the dogs and cats you ever owned in your life come running to meet you.
Until that day, rest in peace Cuddles.
Kinky Friedman
Madina, Texas
February 5, 1993

 

heaven05

(18,124 posts)
38. yep, it does hurt
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 10:26 PM
Aug 2018
stay peaceful in your heart, Curly is at peace........my respects and sympathy......

Brogrizzly

(145 posts)
39. A lot of love for you Marian, it's hard, hurts.
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 10:28 PM
Aug 2018

But I know for a fact you cared and loved Curly with a kind and generous heart. Thank you for that. That makes you an awesome person, take solace inwardly. The pain will get better.

Again a lot of love.

MFM008

(19,808 posts)
40. So sorry
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 10:28 PM
Aug 2018

They wiggle into your heart and break it when they go.
I have to tell my sick mom of 81 her 15 year old kitty died while she was gone.
This wont end well.

 

Laura PourMeADrink

(42,770 posts)
44. Sooooo sorry MJ. Know exactly how you feel. This
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 10:40 PM
Aug 2018

special being who takes care of you and you take care of them is gone. And they were 100% on vigil to take care of you. Always. Reminds me of the joke..Lock your spouse and your dog in the trunk and see which one is glad to see you when you open it up.

The love of a pet (and it's Love for you) is so pure and transcends all human experience.

My dog Larry was diagnosed with aggressive bone cancer 4 months ago. He is still tail wagging and eating and sleeping so still my favorite being. But one day soon I will most certainly feel as you do.

BigmanPigman

(51,590 posts)
46. I was thinking about Curly
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 10:51 PM
Aug 2018

when I read and responded to another post about a very sick pet today on DU. I cried again just now thinking of your loss and how much pain I went through 15 years ago when my little girl died right before Christmas. They say time makes it better to a degree but that does not help much in the meantime. I am still grieving over her. I did get another little girl who now is 15 and I cherish every second with her...since I know there is no "forever". I know a lot of people who died soon after a very loved one died and no one is loved more than our pets. I am sick now but I will live long enough to take care of my baby and that is what counts and I am very happy about that. I will not get another to fill the hole in my heart after she dies since it wouldn't be fair to any dog and would be selfish on my part knowing I couldn't be here to give her a long life of love. I am glad you will be able to do that for another dog and time will eventually allow the good memories to come before the tears. Poor Curly, poor you. I need to get more tissues now (really).

JPK

(651 posts)
47. Along with my Mom's ashes
Wed Aug 8, 2018, 10:53 PM
Aug 2018

I have other three previous pup's ashes waiting for my own, all to be combined and then scattered. We still have three more that are with us that are quickly approaching the time when they will be included as well. Always hard to lose a life long friend.

Latest Discussions»The DU Lounge»I brought Curly's ashes h...