What was/is your dinnertime like?
I thought it was the most normal thing in the world for dinner to be served when dad got home, and later, when my parents split, when mom got home. It was a time for sharing our separate lives and talking about the world. TV and radio were banned during dinner.
I am finding out that this was NOT normal. That some people ate with TV or radio on, sometimes not at a common table, sometimes not at the same time.
What was your dinner like when you grew up? What is it like now?
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Pretty much the same in our house. My dad was a retired Marine, and fairly strict on those type of things. He wasn't The Great Santini weird, but demanded a cordial dinner.
On the other hand, if he cooked breakfast, watch the fuck out! There is an extreme possibility the pomegranate juice was spiked with niacin 
And we all know that results in the flush.
He loved his jokes!
All four of us kids participated on some kind of sports team, so we usually had practice right after school and didn't get home until around 5:30-ish. My Dad was usually home by 6-ish. We would have dinner around 6:30 or so, help clean up (we had a dishwasher so we'd just clear the table and put them in the dishwasher), and then do our homework. Once we had finished our homework we could watch TV for a little while before bed.
My mom was a pretty good cook and we always had fresh vegetables from our garden (she froze them so that we'd have them in winter too). We had to sit up straight, no elbows on the table, no chewing with your mouth open or talking with food in your mouth. It was usually pleasant, but my mother made us drink milk and I hated milk. Sometimes, when she went into the kitchen for something, my dad would drink my milk for me.
I guess it was pretty typical for that period of time, now I see a lot of families where the kids eat separately from the parents. The parents feed the kids first, and then the kids go off and do their thing, and then the parents eat after that. Or everyone will eat at different times because of schedules and athletic events, etc.
Then it went to shit. Lots of nights dad did not come home till late and then he was drunk and ready to fight. By 10, mom was working late as well and dinners were mostly sandwiches and soup by the TV. By 11 and the split, it was the same, sandwich and soup, sometimes mac and cheese, TV was the companion.
Mom had to work a lot to pay off all the debts dad rang up, so I never really saw her that much.
Nowadays dinner is kind of weird still as dysfunction is hard to reset, but we are a good family and love is always present so the circle was broken.
Not looking for sympathy as all is as it was and nothing can be done about the past. Lots of people had it worse than me, for sure.
I am glad your mom was able to hold everything together, that was a blessing. 
It was amazingly cathartic. I know the lounge is not the place for this, but it just sort of spilled out of me.
Thank you for the love...
We only had early dinner if my brother or I had to be at school for a function. Then we ate alone. Dad didn’t get home until 7pm on work nights, so dinner was always between7-7:30ish. My grandparents lived with us and it was always a time to share our days, talk about current events, family memories, etc.
We have done the same thing in our house. Our kids are 27 and 20. We eat as a family with our 27yo every night unless she and I have a meeting. Our son lives with us but eats dinner at his girlfriend’s family’s house frequently. They eat dinner with us once or twice a week.
Also, Sunday night has always been family dinner night. When I was growing up, it meant my Aunts, Uncles, and cousins gathered at our house to visit with us and my grandparents. When I started dating my husband in high school, his mom would have a big family dinner on Tuesdays. It eventually grew to dinner for 17. My in-laws did that for about 27 years until they moved down to Florida.
It makes me feel good that our son found someone who feels the same way about family as we do. . And doesn’t mind family dinners and family vacations.
properly set (which was one of my assigned chores). My mom almost always had a little centerpiece, which might be flowers from the yard, a figurine, an ivy ring (from the yard), etc. We called the evening meal supper, btw. "Dinner" usually meant the main meal on a major holiday, even if it was at mid-day, or "Sunday dinner," which was an elaborate lunch that was served slightly later than on most days to accommodate going to church. We always had ice tea with supper. We never watched TV at meal time, and besides, our only TV was in the basement. The only exception was on election day, when my mom would make a big pot of Brunswick stew in a Dutch oven and we would carry our bowl of stew and our ice tea down to the basement and watch the election returns all evening.
My oldest brother and aunt were killed in a car accident and normal stopped. They died on July 29, 1960, so they were on my mind just recently, as I pass that particular date.
I just recently told my grand kids about how all of us kids would sit at the table in the dining room and eat dinner. There were 5 of us, ranging in age from 15 down to rubber bands off his braces. 4. My older brothers would show us younger kids how to pop our cheeks, and make fart noises under our arms. My oldest brother had braces and had to wear tiny rubber bands. He learned how to open his mouth and shoot the rubber bands at us across the table. We thought it was hilarious. My great aunt had come to live with us after she'd had a stroke, and she sat at the table with us a few times, but we were so rowdy, she started eating in her room. One time, one of my brothers slammed a ketchup bottle down so hard, a drop of ketchup splattered the ceiling. That drop was on the ceiling for years. That day, we were so riotous, my Mom left in the car. Just when we started wondering if she was gone for good, she came back. I remember one of us asking her where she had gone, and she said over to her brother's house.
My parents owned a grocery store, so we always had good meals. My Dad worked until 8 or 9 every night, and Mom would have a different meal ready for him. We usually got casseroles or soup and sandwiches. Dad liked steak and french fries. We had a little pottery pitcher for milk. I think it is Shawnee Pottery, shaped like a chicken. It only held a quart. We started a meal with full glasses of milk, and refilled from the pitcher. It didn't hold nearly enough to refill our glasses, so we only used it a couple of times. I kept it for many years and passed it along to my older daughter a few years ago.
We were much better behaved at holiday dinners. All the good china and silver was out, and there was so much food, there was hardly room for our dinner plates. My parents or my aunt and uncle would set up a card table and the 4 oldest cousins could sit at it. The four youngest sat with the grown ups. The youngest got to sit on a stack of phone books or catalogs so he could reach the table. We lived in Cleveland, Ohio, and the old phone books were massive.
When my husband and I married, we ate dinner with our kids as often as we could. He worked a swing shift, so some weeks he wasn't home. I'd make things that the 3 of us liked, such as fish, or rice, and it would make the week Dad was on afternoons special for us. I think we all ate dinner together at the table until the girls were in their teens. And they both have dinner at the table with their families. I like that we preserved a tradition over so many generations.
The good times didn't last nearly long enough, but I'm glad that I can remember moments that are as brilliant as the day they happened. They outshine the memories I wish I didn't want to keep.
Thanks for posting this question. I enjoyed looking through my memories and sharing them
