I've see it all...actual product: Fart-Vac

[634-5789]

Product description

FartVac is the world's first fart vacuum and filtering system. Using a hand-activated air pump and an activated carbon filter, FartVac reduces the stench of flatulence. It is time to align norms and manners to what is healthy! By taking responsibility and trying to reduce your fart smells, you can now fart without shame--no more pain while fighting nature and holding in gas. Join the proud movement to embrace your body's natural functions. FartVac also makes a great gag or white elephant gift for the gassy people in your life.

https://www.amazon.com/FartVac/dp/B08PMK1VDK/ref=as_li_ss_tl

I've lived too long.

[yankeepants]

1. I have six dogs. Need a half dozen of these.

[EarnestPutz]

3. We have one cat, so we'll need half a doxen too.

[yankeepants]

8. They are the worst. My cat Hugh could clear a room.

[RussellCattle]

2. Hang in there, it's listed as a gag or novelty gift. But really. America, what a great country.

[Blue Owl]

4. Bet they could use a few of those at Mar-a-Lardo

[SWBTATTReg]

5. What do you do, carry this in your purse or what?

[brush]

6. Just the gift for Rudy Giuliani.

[Frustratedlady]

7. Who has to empty it? Just sayin'.

[nocoincidences]

9. Does it sit comfortably inside your Depends?

Does it do anything to mute the sound?

More information needed.

[captain queeg]

10. The Japanese have activated charcoal underwear

It’s really not a bad idea if someone is passing horrendous gas. There was a time in my 20s when I was really bad. I think something to do with my diet at the time. So bad it even made me sick, others really suffered. Back then I thought it was funny, but it was indicative of poor digestive health. It just sort of went away. At the time I blamed Mexican food. Maybe that was part of it, but I hadn’t happened in a very long time. It was fortunate at the time that the kind of work I did provided a little cover.

[Turin_C3PO]

16. I know this is TMI but

I’ve gone through periods where there’s no smell and periods of just the opposite. Same with frequency. It doesn’t appear to be food-related. I wonder what the scientific explanation for this is?

[MuseRider]

11. Oh man,

we have a huge, 100 pound, rescue dog. No idea what kinds he is. He is wonderful but stinky. Still that is nothing compared to the newer rescue we have who is all kinds of odd but certainly a big part of him is boxer. We knew what we were getting into but damn, my house stinks. It can wake you up in the middle of the night and you can leave and get in your car and it goes with you. Too bad this is a novelty item. I would have paid a fortune for a couple of those.

[I_UndergroundPanther]

12. Take internal deoderant

I take copper and chlorophyll pills you can get them at health food stores and online.

They kill all the odors.

I take them because every deoderant including deoderant stones piss off my armpits into a red painful weeping rash of pain.

You take the internal deoderant and after about a week of taking it your farts won't smell anymore.

[Laffy Kat]

13. Charcoal pills work, too.

They sell those in health food stores, as well. You can also poop out your own briquettes.

[LuckyCharms]

14. But...I like people to smell mine.

I can blow back a person's hair from 20 feet.

[Hotler]

15. My mom would say, "Sniff lightly so there is enough to go around."

[LuckyCharms]

17. Smart woman!