What do you call ---

[packman]

Q: What do you call a fake noodle?
A: An impasta!

Q: What do you do to get a robot mad?
A: Push all of its buttons.

Q: What do you call a joke without a punchline?
A: Silence.

Q: What do you call the security guards outside the Samsung factory?
A: The Guardians of the Galaxy.


Q: What do you call someone who never passes gas in public?
A: A private tutor.

Q: What do you call it when a prisoner takes his own mugshot?
A: A cellfie.

Q: What do you call blackbirds that stick together?
A: Vel-crows.

Q: What do you call the daughter of a hamburger?
A: Patty.

Q: What do you call a tiny mother?
A: A minimum!

Q: What do you call a policeman in bed?
A: An undercover cop.

Q: What do you call a soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray?
A: A seasoned veteran.

Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?
A: A stick.

Q: What do you call a factory that manufactures products that are just OK?
A: A satisfactory.

Q: What do you call a person with a briefcase in a tree?
A: Branch manager.

Q: What do you call someone who cleans the bottom of the ocean?
A: A mer-maid.

Q: What do you call something that goes up when the rain comes down?
A: An umbrella.

Q: What do you call a doctor who fixes websites?
A: A URL-ologist.

[MLAA]

1. I really got a kick out of these. Thanks!

[House of Roberts]

2. I dub thee...Henny Packman!

[underpants]

3. Why do women travel in groups of 3, 5, and 7?

Because... they. Just can’t. EVEN!!! 😱

[rsdsharp]

4. I don't know.

They usually go to the restroom in pairs.

What can two men do easily, a man and a woman do with some difficulty, and two women can’t do at all?

[Ocelot II]

5. My favorite neologism: What do you call someone who's both stupid and an asshole?

A: An ignoranus.

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

6. What do you call an overweight, cheeseburger-eating, Diet Coke drinking, lying, pedophile?

Donald Trump

(He allegedly raped a 13-year-old girl)