Quite the athlete, MiddleFingerMom was universally described as "gazelle-like". (DIAL-UP WARNING!!!)

[MiddleFingerMom]

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[hunter]

1. How the hell does that happen?

The spikes fall out of his shoes, or something?

Failure of a hidden launch device?

Flatulence?

[bluesbassman]

2. RUI would be my guess.

10 for style points though.

[HopeHoops]

3. What the FUCK is up with the guy on the left?

[MiddleFingerMom]

5. False start, thus two QUICK shots of the starter's pistol.

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His neurons misfired and he was right on the cusp. His brain was
telling him "STOP" and "GO" at the exact same time.
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(edit to add: ) I used to be a competition swimmer. Can't tell you how many false starts
there were where I managed to stop myself at the last SPLIT-second and stand up in
the blocks, only to be unable to stop myself from teetering on into the pool anyways.
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I definitely feel his pain. And his (and my) recognition of our inner doofuses.
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[Baitball Blogger]

4. Double Gainer, with a twist scratch start.

Man. That is hard to do.

[A Simple Game]

6. I've watched it 5 times, which one is supposed to be you? n/t

[MiddleFingerMom]

7. If you slow it WAY down, you can catch my blur in Lane #2.

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I'm way down at the finish line before the other guys are turning around.
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I wasn't just called "Flash" because of my raincoat, y'know.
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[Kennah]

8. The raincoat is just more memorable