Man hides 10'' gun in rectum.

[ohiosmith]

There are some places you should definitely not hide a gun.

Police in North Carolina believe that despite multiple searches after a traffic violation , a suspect managed to sneak a 10-inch gun into a prison last Monday by concealing the weapon in his rectum.

One day later, officers confiscated the .38 revolver from the jail cell of Michael Leon Ward, arrested Jan. 9, a statement from the Onslow County Sheriff's Office explains. They'd performed a strip search on Ward and even required that he "squat and cough" to see if he held any contraband, but nothing turned up, according to MSNBC.

He was initially arrested because police allegedly found drugs and related paraphernalia during the traffic stop.


Link: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/16/man-hides-gun-in-rectum_n_1208666.html

[Denninmi]

1. Wow, and I thought "Fusili Jerry" would hurt.

"It was a million to one shot, Doc, a million to one."

[geardaddy]

6. ...

[ohiosmith]

9. Hahahaha!

[Initech]

30. I'm Cosmo Kramer..........The Ass Man!!!

[Gidney N Cloyd]

51. heh.

[OffWithTheirHeads]

2. Bet he had to use a gallon of Santorum to do that.

[ohiosmith]

12. Minimum!

[Aerows]

43. Okay, I about fell out of my chair over that one

LMFAO!

[LeftinOH]

3. I don't know how this is even possible-

Seriously, I don't. Maybe some people have a frequently used "container area" which can accommodate objects like a gun.

[sakabatou]

5. Me neither.

[geardaddy]

4. IBTL

Oh, you said "gun"

[MrCoffee]

7. "Did I remember to leave the safety on?"

[mysuzuki2]

50. Unfortunately, revolvers generally do not have safeties.

a "smarter" person would have used an automatic.

[Arkansas Granny]

8. Rectum, hell! It damn near killed him!

[Initech]

11. Literally in this case!

[Initech]

10. They can have my gun when they pry it from the inside of my ass!

[ohiosmith]

19. "Cold dead ass"

[Neoma]

13. Ewwwwweeeeeweeewww.

Ewwwwwweeeeewwweeeee

[ohiosmith]

21. Don't be so judgmental.

[leftyohiolib]

14. well thats it . body cavity searches at the airport

[ohiosmith]

24. Ouch!

[KamaAina]

15. Happiness is a warm gun...

[ohiosmith]

26. 98.6 degrees.

[KamaAina]

27. No, that's the oral temperature

Temperatures taken with a rectal thermometer (or gun) average about one degree warmer.

[ohiosmith]

32. The shit you learn here!

[TheMightyFavog]

16. Gives a whole new meaning to concealed carry....

O_o

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

17. "Draw, pardner!"

"Er, hang on.... wait a sec here... I've almost got it. Oh, it's a little slippery. Just give me another second, willya? Damn... Oh, here it comes... I got it, I got it!... Damn, I dropped it, it's kinda..."

*BANG*

[ohiosmith]

28. Hahahaha!

[intaglio]

18. To nearly quote Mae West

Is that a gun in your rectum or are you afraid to sit down?

[ohiosmith]

31. Hahahaha!

[MilesColtrane]

20. Believe me, you don't want to know where he hid the bullets.

[ohiosmith]

37. Where?

[MilesColtrane]

58. Let's just hope that police station has a kevlar urinal.

[siligut]

22. This story smells

He had time to stick a gun up his butt, but left drugs and paraphernalia to be found on a traffic stop? Then he just leaves the gun in the toilet? Nope, the story stinks.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

23. So does the gun.

[siligut]

25. Leave it to you to get a double entendre

But I still think the story is fishy.

[ohiosmith]

38. Bwahahahaha!

[petronius]

33. That was my thought when this was first posted in the Guns forum

It really sounds like the SO is overlooking the far more likely possibility that some staff member colluded in smuggling it in. And I'm more convinced of that now that I see the size - when I was assuming it was a something much smaller it was within the realm of possibility...

So yeah, color me skeptical as well.

[bigwillq]

29. Power bottom

[BiggJawn]

34. That hammer spur can't have felt comfy...

Le Petomain Lives!

[deucemagnet]

35. "Let me tell you something, pendejo.

You pull any of your crazy shit with us, you flash a piece out on the lanes, I'll take it away from you and...oh...never mind."

[Behind the Aegis]

36. Think he is a "crack shot?"

[ohiosmith]

41. Hahahaha!

[yellowcanine]

39. "even required that he "squat and cough" to see if he held any contraband, but nothing turned up"

Ok someone with a sense of humor coined that line.

[dimbear]

40. A gun has a butt. Why can't a butt have a gun? n/t

[ohiosmith]

42. Winner!

[pokerfan]

44. I heard that it almost wrecked him!

[Justice wanted]

45. Is that possible? I mean how did he walk?

GAWD I can hear the comedians on this one.

[ohiosmith]

48. Like he had a pant's load.

[yellowcanine]

49. There is a reason the other prisoners called him Shuffling Mike.

[Lasher]

46. Jesus, don't you think he could've found a smaller gun?

Think he practiced by shoving watermelons up his ass? Wonder what would have happened if he'd farted? Would bullets have shot out his ass? Don't point that thing at me!

[Turbineguy]

47. I'm going to the DU Lounge.

Oh, wait, never mind.

[Orrex]

52. If you can think of a better way to shoot the shit, I'd like to hear it.

Now that's what I call a .38 special.

[ohiosmith]

53. Bwahahahaha!

[Orrex]

54. Proof that any asshole can get a gun these days

[ohiosmith]

55. Hi Oooo!

[BiggJawn]

56. Feel sorry for the poor tech who had to "test fire" it...

"Where'd they find this gun, McGee?"
"Um, up the suspect's ass, Abby..."



"GIBBS!!!!"

[Orrex]

57. By the way, is his CCL up to date?

[TheCruces]

59. How does that even work?