Fri Aug 30, 2013, 04:37 PM
Blue_Tires (55,415 posts)
NOT Florida: Woman Hid Stolen $5000 In Her Rectum
AUGUST 30--A Tennessee woman is hospitalized and facing a criminal charge for allegedly stealing $5000 from her boyfriend, cash she hid in her rectum and unsuccessfully sought to retrieve with a toilet brush and tongs when confronted by the theft victim, police report.
Christie Black, 43, swiped the money at the residence she shared with Bobby Gulley, according to a Hawkins County Sheriff’s Office report. Gulley told deputies early Tuesday that the cash--in $100 denominations--had been in two envelopes inside a medicine bag that he placed atop a foosball table. Gulley further explained he did this to “set a trap” for Black, whom he suspected had been stealing from him. After later discovering the cash missing, Gulley, 46, called cops. He also confronted Black, who reportedly “admitted to him she’d wrapped it up and stuck it in her rectum,” investigators noted. She also became ill and “threw up a Saran wrapped baggy of partially dissolved pills.” http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/woman-hides-money-in-butt-685432
|
26 replies, 2921 views
![]() |
Author | Time | Post |
![]() |
Blue_Tires | Aug 2013 | OP |
jakeXT | Aug 2013 | #1 | |
Blue_Tires | Aug 2013 | #10 | |
olddots | Aug 2013 | #2 | |
Turbineguy | Aug 2013 | #3 | |
Demoiselle | Aug 2013 | #6 | |
madinmaryland | Aug 2013 | #13 | |
NYC_SKP | Aug 2013 | #4 | |
rug | Aug 2013 | #5 | |
cliffordu | Aug 2013 | #17 | |
Enrique | Aug 2013 | #7 | |
LiberalEsto | Aug 2013 | #8 | |
bluesbassman | Aug 2013 | #9 | |
nolabear | Aug 2013 | #11 | |
bluesbassman | Aug 2013 | #12 | |
KamaAina | Aug 2013 | #14 | |
pipi_k | Aug 2013 | #15 | |
mockmonkey | Aug 2013 | #16 | |
Initech | Aug 2013 | #18 | |
Baitball Blogger | Aug 2013 | #26 | |
pinboy3niner | Aug 2013 | #19 | |
struggle4progress | Aug 2013 | #20 | |
Locut0s | Aug 2013 | #21 | |
MiddleFingerMom | Aug 2013 | #22 | |
In_The_Wind | Aug 2013 | #23 | |
noamnety | Aug 2013 | #24 | |
mysuzuki2 | Aug 2013 | #25 |
Response to jakeXT (Reply #1)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 05:02 PM
Blue_Tires (55,415 posts)
10. I'm pretty sure that had she escaped, her first stop would be the bank
to "exchange" her bills....
|
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 04:42 PM
olddots (10,237 posts)
2. Donald Trump
carries 1 million dollars in singles up his butt all the time .
![]() ![]() |
Response to olddots (Reply #2)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 04:46 PM
Turbineguy (31,955 posts)
3. You know,
somehow that just seems so much more believable than the stuff he comes up with.
|
Response to olddots (Reply #2)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 04:47 PM
Demoiselle (6,787 posts)
6. Oh. My. God.
Thank you for the mental image. It will last me for weeks.Tee Hee.
|
Response to olddots (Reply #2)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 06:02 PM
madinmaryland (63,068 posts)
13. I think he just hides it in his hair. nt
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 04:46 PM
NYC_SKP (68,644 posts)
4. Rectum? Nearly Killdum!
![]() |
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 04:47 PM
rug (82,333 posts)
5. "Does this money make my ass look fat?"
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 04:50 PM
Enrique (27,461 posts)
7. you keep it... n/t
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 04:54 PM
LiberalEsto (22,845 posts)
8. OMG! It's starting to spread to other states.
I'm talking about Floriditis
|
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 04:57 PM
bluesbassman (18,414 posts)
9. "sought to retrieve with a toilet brush and tongs". That's some scary shit right there.
![]() |
Response to bluesbassman (Reply #9)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 05:40 PM
nolabear (37,643 posts)
11. Seriously. Who can GET in that position? Time for the Dyson!
![]() |
Response to nolabear (Reply #11)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 05:46 PM
bluesbassman (18,414 posts)
12. Ouch, ouch, ouch... *FWUUUMP*
Whew! That's better!
![]() |
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 06:05 PM
KamaAina (78,249 posts)
14. Filthy lucre, indeed
"Money... is nothing other than odourless, dehydrated filth that has been made to shine." -Sandor Ferenczi, an early disciple of Freud
|
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 06:06 PM
pipi_k (21,020 posts)
15. What's worse is...
it was all in quarters...
![]() |
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Fri Aug 30, 2013, 06:17 PM
mockmonkey (2,549 posts)
16. That's ok
I'll take a check.
|
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Sat Aug 31, 2013, 01:45 AM
Initech (85,871 posts)
18. I like how you had to say "Not Florida".
![]() |
Response to Initech (Reply #18)
Sat Aug 31, 2013, 11:38 AM
Baitball Blogger (37,397 posts)
26. Well, we are in the worst heat of the summer.
She could be a snow bird.
|
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Sat Aug 31, 2013, 01:48 AM
pinboy3niner (53,339 posts)
19. "Get thee behind me, C-notes!"
![]() |
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Sat Aug 31, 2013, 02:51 AM
struggle4progress (111,254 posts)
20. ick
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Sat Aug 31, 2013, 04:24 AM
Locut0s (6,154 posts)
21. "threw up a Saran wrapped baggy of partially dissolved pills."...
So... she was a drug mule as well? That sounds odd.
And yeah the part about retrieving the money using tongs and a toilet brush. I could have gone all day without those images in my head. ![]() |
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Sat Aug 31, 2013, 05:27 AM
MiddleFingerMom (25,163 posts)
22. I used to have to work 40 hours for a shitty paycheck.
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Sat Aug 31, 2013, 07:31 AM
In_The_Wind (71,848 posts)
23. OMG!
[img]
![]() The insanity is spreading. ![]() |
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Sat Aug 31, 2013, 08:55 AM
noamnety (20,234 posts)
24. Everything here makes sense
except the toilet brush. I just cannot figure out the logic in that - how would that work without jamming things up even further?
|
Response to Blue_Tires (Original post)
Sat Aug 31, 2013, 10:29 AM
mysuzuki2 (3,521 posts)
25. This gives new meaning to the phrase
"dirty money."
|