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LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 03:03 PM Nov 2023

Thank you everyone for being so kind and supportive.

My oncotype test came back and I will not have to go through chemo, which is a major relief to me.

Looks like it will be just radiation and endocrine therapy.

So I have a lot to be thankful for as thanksgiving approaches.

I have been going through a bit of mourning for my old pre-cancer self and body but I know I will be happy with my new breasts once the scars are not quite so gruesome and once the swelling has subsided. I think on this cancer journey we all have moments where we need to let the sadness out and mourn, and then carry on.

Thank you all for being here and being you.

52 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Thank you everyone for being so kind and supportive. (Original Post) LiberalLoner Nov 2023 OP
Excellent news, hope the trend of good news continues. Silent Type Nov 2023 #1
Thank you so much! ❤️ LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #19
Wonderful! Happy thanksgiving indeed! Sending hugs, MLAA Nov 2023 #2
Thank you so much! ❤️🤗 LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #20
Hugggggs Very good news indeed. Remember that your DU family niyad Nov 2023 #3
Thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️ LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #21
I'm glad you won't have to have chemo. CaptainTruth Nov 2023 #4
Thank you so much! ❤️🤗 LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #22
Great to hear! peppertree Nov 2023 #5
Thank you so much! ❤️ I will look that up! LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #23
Attitude is part of the healing and you have it! Deuxcents Nov 2023 #6
Thank you so much! ❤️ I've been trying to take it one step at a time, one procedure at a time, one day at a time. LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #24
A very good friend's sister is recovering from Deuxcents Nov 2023 #38
Oh wow that's a scary one but if you beat it for five years, it won't come back. The kind I have isn't so scary but LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #41
Welcome news! cilla4progress Nov 2023 #7
Thank you so much! ❤️ LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #25
Good news that you do not have to endure chemo. Lonestarblue Nov 2023 #8
Thank you so much! ❤️ I hope so much your friend will be okay now. A lot of the cancer boards I've been LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #26
Excellent Duncanpup Nov 2023 #9
Thanks! ❤️ LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #27
Best wishes to you and your family on your Journey to healing. NT SWBTATTReg Nov 2023 #10
Thank you! ❤️ I think it's been harder on my husband than me. And I can't guarantee him that I will beat this cancer LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #28
there's always someone here on DU Skittles Nov 2023 #11
Thank you so much ❤️ I'm feeling far too needy these days tbh. LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #29
never! Skittles Nov 2023 #48
You have been on my mind. MontanaMama Nov 2023 #12
Thank you so much! ❤️ it's really reminded me of my mortality. It's made me see my breasts as traitors, which LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #30
They've been integral to my living with cancer and it's treatment, too. marble falls Nov 2023 #13
Hugs to you 🤗🤗🤗and best wishes on your journey and wishes for no recurrences ever. Eff cancer!❤️ LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #32
Good news, all the best and Happy Thanksgiving! appalachiablue Nov 2023 #14
Thank you so much! ❤️ same to you! LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #33
Sounds like good news to me. LoisB Nov 2023 #15
Thank you so much! ❤️ one step at a time. So many have walked this path before me, including my mother. LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #34
I saw this somewhere, goes something like this: LoisB Nov 2023 #37
I love it! ❤️❤️❤️ LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #42
I'm so glad Goddessartist Nov 2023 #16
Hi dear friend! I'm so grateful for you and hope you are well! Life is not easy with these bodies that give us trouble. LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #35
I'm glad you're being spared Chemo. Solly Mack Nov 2023 #17
Thank you so much. I'm trying to keep a positive mental attitude about the cancer treatments but I have times LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #36
So thankful for your winning. ancianita Nov 2023 #18
Thank you ❤️ I am so sorry your friend has been through so much and I hope she will be okay now. LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #39
Glad to hear that you and your husband served your country. Glad, too, ancianita Nov 2023 #46
Thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️🤗🤗🤗 LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #52
Great news! MOMFUDSKI Nov 2023 #31
Thank you so much ❤️ it's hard for me to see myself as worthy of love. LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #40
As an almost 12 year survivor, TNNurse Nov 2023 #43
Thank you so much ❤️ and I hope so much you never have a recurrence 🤗 I've actually already LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #45
Lots of love to you all and Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate ❤️❤️❤️ LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #44
So glad to hear the good news! You've got this! n/t KatK Nov 2023 #47
Thank you ❤️ LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #50
So glad for your good news. stage left Nov 2023 #49
Thank you! ❤️ you too! LiberalLoner Nov 2023 #51

niyad

(113,021 posts)
3. Hugggggs Very good news indeed. Remember that your DU family
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 03:40 PM
Nov 2023

continues to be here for you. Lean as hard as you need.

Deuxcents

(16,067 posts)
6. Attitude is part of the healing and you have it!
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 03:48 PM
Nov 2023

I’m sure it’s brought you this far and my best wishes to the finish line. ((hugs))

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
24. Thank you so much! ❤️ I've been trying to take it one step at a time, one procedure at a time, one day at a time.
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:19 PM
Nov 2023

Otherwise it seems too daunting and frightening. I tell myself I just need to do this one thing and I don’t have to think about the other things.

Deuxcents

(16,067 posts)
38. A very good friend's sister is recovering from
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:47 PM
Nov 2023

Triple-negative breast cancer and she has said many times what you say..one day at a time. I’ve known both of them for over 40 years and she is doing fine now..check ups are good but she had chemo and radiation so her journey took some time. I hug her extra tight when I see her 🤗

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
41. Oh wow that's a scary one but if you beat it for five years, it won't come back. The kind I have isn't so scary but
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 08:01 PM
Nov 2023

It’s very sneaky and there’s always that risk.

My oncotype report says if I do the endocrine therapy my risk of distant recurrence (the fatal stuff) is only 3-4% at nine years. Why nine years as a measurement? Heck if I know. But hey here’s to nine more years, anyway.

The chemo seems so awful compared to radiation or even surgery so I was dreading it. I hate being sick to my stomach and the idea of losing my fingernails and toenails as well as all my hair seemed kind of disturbing.

Bless you for hugging her extra tight 🤗🤗🤗❤️❤️❤️

Hope she never has a recurrence. Yeah, between surgery, chemo, radiation, that’s most of a year filled with misery. But there’s no other choice, not really.

Lonestarblue

(9,958 posts)
8. Good news that you do not have to endure chemo.
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 03:54 PM
Nov 2023

I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving and beyond. I have a friend who has gone through a truly horrendous year with cancer but has emerged with good tests now. So here’s wishing you those same good tests.


LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
26. Thank you so much! ❤️ I hope so much your friend will be okay now. A lot of the cancer boards I've been
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:21 PM
Nov 2023

Reading, I see people who are fighting cancer saying “fuck cancer” and I thought, how wonderful and cathartic to say that. So now I say that too. Fuck cancer.

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
28. Thank you! ❤️ I think it's been harder on my husband than me. And I can't guarantee him that I will beat this cancer
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:24 PM
Nov 2023

Because none of us can know for sure. Just doing the treatments and hoping.

MontanaMama

(23,294 posts)
12. You have been on my mind.
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 04:42 PM
Nov 2023

What a road this has been! I’m happy for your good news. Cancer indeed changes you. Mourn when you need to and celebrate when you can. Happy Thanksgiving. ❤️

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
30. Thank you so much! ❤️ it's really reminded me of my mortality. It's made me see my breasts as traitors, which
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:32 PM
Nov 2023

Might sound strange, but that’s how I feel about it, they betrayed me and I am angry with them. And now they look ugly with fresh scars and swelling, frankenboobs. So I don’t much like them at the moment. But I’m sure I will come to terms with all of it, with what happened and the appearance of them and the risk of recurrence.

I did buy a nice holiday dress, some kind of faux stretchy green velvet, maxi length, and some cute boots. In defiance of the cancer. No matter how I feel, no matter where I am in the treatment, I am going to go out with friends for a nice holiday meal and I am going to wear my cute new dress and boots and celebrate.

Because life is short, might as well put on a nice outfit and celebrate with friends.

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
32. Hugs to you 🤗🤗🤗and best wishes on your journey and wishes for no recurrences ever. Eff cancer!❤️
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:35 PM
Nov 2023

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
34. Thank you so much! ❤️ one step at a time. So many have walked this path before me, including my mother.
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:38 PM
Nov 2023

I’m thinking there is a song that might be useful to me right about now if I can handle hearing it.

Just trying to carry on. We have no choice…

LoisB

(7,170 posts)
37. I saw this somewhere, goes something like this:
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:46 PM
Nov 2023

Getting knocked down is part of life,
Getting back up is living.

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
35. Hi dear friend! I'm so grateful for you and hope you are well! Life is not easy with these bodies that give us trouble.
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:41 PM
Nov 2023

I think a lot these days about the stories I was told as a child about how my body will have no aches or pains or sickness in heaven and I can’t help but think, hey, sounds cool, can I get that body now instead of having to wait?

Solly Mack

(90,758 posts)
17. I'm glad you're being spared Chemo.
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 05:52 PM
Nov 2023

Feel how you feel. Anger, sadness, grief, all part of the experience.

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
36. Thank you so much. I'm trying to keep a positive mental attitude about the cancer treatments but I have times
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:43 PM
Nov 2023

When I struggle. It’s pretty normal I think.

❤️❤️❤️

ancianita

(35,926 posts)
18. So thankful for your winning.
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 05:57 PM
Nov 2023

Why winning? Well, I've a close friend of ten years who had the same op as you but a more virulent cancer, and has gone through years of chemo and radiation. She never gave up (smoked lots of weed to help her sleep and eat) and is now in remission, with eyelashes and hair finally growing back. By witnessing her hard fight through these past years, I can only imagine how you feel. Maybe it's less like winning, and more like being part of a special club of spiritual strength, and now, longer life.

Long may you run, LiberalLoner. Have peaceful, happy holidays ahead !

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
39. Thank you ❤️ I am so sorry your friend has been through so much and I hope she will be okay now.
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 07:53 PM
Nov 2023

Her mountain she had to climb is much steeper than my hill and I do need to count my blessings.

I told my husband, hey, all the women in my family get breast cancer, but they all beat it. Trying to ease his worry some. He tries to hide his worries and sadness from me, and I do the same with him. We try to be strong soldiers in front of one another. We met as soldiers in the same unit. We still behave as those soldiers, with the same values.

Thank you for the long may you run. I appreciate that, and you. ❤️

Sometimes I have a hard time facing my doctors after surgery because I know they have seen me naked and vulnerable, with all my many faults. I feel overwhelming shame when I see them, and the feelings of shame trigger a tsunami of self-hatred because I detest so much letting anyone see me naked. It’s a hard internal struggle I have, and I want to hide but that’s not what is best for me. Other people don’t mind being seen naked so much, but for me, it’s really hard.

ancianita

(35,926 posts)
46. Glad to hear that you and your husband served your country. Glad, too,
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 08:24 PM
Nov 2023

to know that you'll soldier through this together. We're lucky to have service members here, and you're both appreciated. I'm glad he's stayed by your side through this. My friend's husband was depressed about his wife's body but he knew none of it was about him; that's when I learned how difficult it is for husbands, who step up to love the you that is not your body.
This naked thing is totally understandable. Maybe (?) try to think of it as temporary. Maybe consider even telling your doctors how you feel; you might be surprised at how they respond, maybe hear some pretty positive things about yourself. They know they're in the business of healing the whole person. (I told something similar to my doctor once before a yearly gynecological exam ( I was in my 50's) and I was surprised and relieved when he said, well, given how good your health's been, let's forget it, then, if you feel that way. So we never bothered with it again. Good guy, that one.)

TNNurse

(6,924 posts)
43. As an almost 12 year survivor,
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 08:04 PM
Nov 2023

I am happy to hear you do not need chemo. Physically, it was the hardest part. Surgery was bad, radiation was tough and Estrogen blocking therapy was tough, but chemo was scary awful.

You will continue to mourn your former body. Please be sure you get evaluated for lymphedema, surgery and radiation are the reason for mine.

Take care of yourself and please check back in.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Alice Beth

LiberalLoner

(9,761 posts)
45. Thank you so much ❤️ and I hope so much you never have a recurrence 🤗 I've actually already
Sun Nov 19, 2023, 08:14 PM
Nov 2023

Been to physical therapy, my doctor has been right on top of things and no lymphedema but this swelling in the left breast is sure taking it’s sweet time to resolve. I’m doing the lymphatic massages but I guess it’s just going to take more time.

Five weeks tomorrow so maybe I don’t need to panic too much yet about the swelling, maybe it will resolve in a few more weeks. It’s already much better than it was three weeks ago…at two weeks past surgery I had a block of concrete as a breast and I seriously wondered if the blood supply could function in such a grossly swollen piece of tissue. Now it’s feeling like regular flesh again, although still heavier and more swollen than I would like. So I’m telling myself not to worry just yet, let my body have a few more weeks to heal.

I’m sorry you had to go through chemo. Of everything I’ve read up on, that seemed the scariest. So I was relieved when the test showed less than a one percent benefit from chemo. No way they will recommend chemo with that low a benefit because the risks outweigh it. I mean I will wait to hear what my medical oncologist has to say, but there’s no way I could see the doctor recommending chemo.

I hope you never have to go through anything that awful ever again.

I hope you have a good Thanksgiving! I’m glad you beat the cancer. 🤗

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