I guess I have a new cat and my current cat wants to murder her.

[herding cats]

Backstory: I went out of town for 5 days. Chewy' s dropped off a box of cat food on my door one which I didn't realize was being delivered while I was gone. A raccoon (I'm assuming) opened the box and the bag and turned my porch into a free buffet for every beast in the neighborhood. When we pulled up there was the sweetest little kitty helping herself to a free meal. She had a newish collar on but no tags and looked well tended. She's friendly, sweet and was obviously a house kitty since she beat us to the door and immediately wanted in.

I didn't comply thinking she had a home and was on a walk about and her loved ones were awaiting her return. After 3 days of her still being here (I fed her each night) she was in a fight and I ran outside to save her from a mean feral. She was immediately moved into a spare bathroom. I took her to my vet to be scanned for a chip. There wasn't one. I then posted her pic on social media and next door. No hits. So, I guess she's my kitty now, which is fine she's sweet as can be and I adore her. She's already spayed and I sprang for the first round of shots (JIK) while at the vets. The problem is, my existing cat, a 3-1/2 year old female Siamese wants her gone.

My otherwise sweet kitty wants to murder the new kitty! She ignores her in the bathroom just fine, until I go in. Then she screams at the door like a madman and I'm positive from the reaction of the new kitty she's bestowing death threats on her! There's hissing, growling and all forms of kitty obscenities. It's not pretty. She even hisses at my hands which touched her until I scrub them extra well. It's crazy.

Does anyone know of a way to slowly acclimate my (formerly) sweet kitty to the new one gently? I want them to be friends if it's at all possible. This current level of trash talking and obvious threats of dismemberment and possibly murder aren't sustainable.

[brer cat]

1. I don't have an answer, but it sure sounds like fun at your house!

[herding cats]

2. It's nuts!

At one point I was scared my Siamese was so mad she'd forgotten she loves me and was going to shred the face off me! Then after my decontamination she chilled back out. I'm in over my head here and that's a fact.

[blm]

3. Loolol

[BoomaofBandM]

4. We got our cats to stop hissing and start playing with a laser pointer.

They were both less than 2 years old, and they were with us until they were 20, passing within 6 months of each other. I still miss them. Good luck.

[herding cats]

6. Thank you. ❤️

I don't think we're quite to that level yet, though. I lost both of my older kitties within 6 moths of each other, too. I understand how you never stop missing them. ❤️

If it were just hissing I could handle it. This is next level trash talking from my current kitty. I've never heard anything like this demonic yowling come from her mouth before. Ever!

[tblue37]

5. It can take a while, but eventually they adjust. Within a couple of weeks they will at least

tolerate each other. Maybe even sooner. Your first cat is making sure the newby knows she's the territory's primary ruler.

[herding cats]

7. I really, really hope so.

I've had cats my whole life. I've introduced new ones to my old ones and never seen anything this level before. It's like my Siamese refuses to share me, and frankly I'm suspicious a lot of her theatrics are to keep me in line rather than the new kitty. And, it's working!

She follows me around growling after I leave the new kitty puffed up like she's had her tail in an electrical outlet, growling until I change clothes and wash my hands to her statistician. Which is two to three times.

I'm living in crazy town here.

[dixiechiken1]

8. You're killin' me here...

[herding cats]

14. It's all fun and games...

Until you're wearing an angry cat on your head!

[2naSalit]

11. Some Siamese cats...

Insist on being only children. She might relax about the new one after a week or two. The sooner you start letting the newer one out, the sooner they will figure it out.

[herding cats]

15. I'd taken in my deceased neighbor's kitty and she dealt with him.

He was 17 years old and senile. He hissed at everything but had no teeth (literally) and she never went nuts on him like this. She tolerated him after he made it clear they wouldn't be deep friends. She was less than a year old then, though. She missed him and looked for him when he passed a few moths ago. She's never been a psychopathic kitty before now.

But, maybe she's decided she liked the life of a solo kitty? Its definitely possible.

[2naSalit]

18. I think she'll be okay in time...

They respond to kittens differently but she'll probably settled down after a few days, especially if you try the techniques mentioned in post #10.

[herding cats]

20. This kitty is close to year old ish per my vet.

Younger but not a baby. She's smaller by a lot and younger but not a true baby kitten. She's definitely submissive and has zero clue about living outdoors. She's so very happy to be inside and safe now. I should have realized she wasn't an indoor outdoor kitty by how hard she tried to get into my home from day one. I'm kicking my butt for that. I thought she'd just been enjoying the easy buffet and was comfortable taking a look around. When she kept showing back up I got suspicious, but when she was looking dirtier and more thrilled to see me each time I pretty much knew she was either lost or dumped. The first thing I did on day 2 was notify the local shelters. She has a distinct heart marking on her back, but no one was looking for her. Then I went to social media with a pic showing her face and back without her collar. I said they'd have to describe it. Crickets. Someone has loved her before. She's spayed well adjusted and other than very recent malnutrition (some weight loss and shedding) she's very healthy per my vet.

I just took the throw off my bed and gave it to her to sleep on rather than the fresh one I'd provided her. She had zero qualms about it smelling like my other kitty and immediately started making biscuits on it. She at least knows she safe in her sheltered bathroom. I dearly hope I can make this work for her sake.

Raging moderate is a true cat whisperer! I'm so grateful they posted here! ❤️

[2naSalit]

22. Yup...

I didn't have anything better to suggest, really. This younger one sounds like she's been traumatized so keeping her in a private room for a few days to let her get a little more relaxed and feeling more secure about her surroundings is probably a good idea. Then introducing her to the other might be easier for her. And perhaps the other cat can sense her confusion which would make that one more averse to being there.

Good luck and good one you for taking her in.

[wnylib]

29. I had a half Siamese once. They can get

very possessive with their humans.

Maybe try getting her used to the new kitty's scent by letting the new kitty play with a toy or lie down on a towel or blanket, and then bring the toy or blanket out into the rest of the home to let the Siamese smell it and get used to the smell.

Also, put the new kitty into a carrier or cage for safety and let them see each other for brief periods each day. Or put them both in a carrier when being near each other so the new kitty doesn't get too frightened or intimidated.

Plan C - Get some protective gear for yourself. And make sure the Siamese has her claws kept short.

Good luck.

[herding cats]

32. She's a rescue from a bad breeder who was busted.

Her mommy died due to bad breeding conditions (no veterinary care and a baby stuck in the birthing canal) I got her via a rescue situation. She's been mine since she was just a few days over 8 weeks old.

She's not my first Siamese, but yeah, they love their humans a lot and are extremely vocal.

I'm working on the scent therapy now. Excellent advice! ❤️

[raging moderate]

10. You can help by pairing the new cat with treats in the old cat's mind.

Make it feel as though the new cat is producing more treats for the old cat. Arrange things so you can suddenly toss a tiny treat to the old cat just as she catches sight of the new cat. Then give a tiny treat to the new cat, too. Also, somehow help the new cat smell more like the old cat, or like you. Right after you brush the old cat, or yourself, take the captured hairs from the brush and rub them all over the new cat. You can have the new cat sit for an hour in a cat carrier (with a water dish, of course) so the old cat can walk around, looking and sniffing at the new cat (one made so the old cat cannot reach in to hit/scratch the new cat). After awhile, toss some little treats to both of them at the same time. Eventually, playing flashlight tag with two separate flashlights on opposite sides of the room is a good idea. Then, you can start feeding them simultaneously on opposite sides of the room ( always giving to the old cat first, of course). Oh, and maybe put some little towel under the old cat's usual blanket in her bed for a few nights, so it picks up some of her smell. Then put that towel under the new cat for a few nights, so she rolls around in it and smells more the way the old cat thinks a cat should smell.

[herding cats]

13. This is brilliant and very helpful!

Last edited Wed Apr 27, 2022, 11:39 PM - Edit history (1)

I hadn't thought of any of these, but they make perfect sense.

My deepest thanks to you! Smelling more like my old cat and me should be easy. We share a bed and I can use a blanket we've both been sleeping on. I'll use my kitties brush on her as well as mine. Currently she smells like outdoors which is foreign to my kitty. That's bound to be a stressor to my kitty. She's been taught not to go outside and treats it as if it's dangerous.

The treats... kitty psychology 101 stuff I hadn't even considered!

Seriously, thank you so much! ❤️

[More_Cowbell]

9. I brought in a new kitty a few years ago; they've never bonded

There was a cat who was living on my apartment patio, so he and my cat had sniffed each other through the screen door and "met" a few times outside for a few moments.

Then the apartment complex did massive renovations, including demolishing my patio, and I brought the new kitty in.

The new cat is much larger than my older kitty, and very aware that he's the interloper. When my older cat swipes at him, he just looks the other way. He hangs back at feeding time, too.

They don't like each other, but they mostly get along. Any fuss between them is started by my older cat. It helps if they get outside for a half hour or so at the end of the day, and I separate them at night (older kitty with me in bedroom with shut door) so they have some time when they know they won't run into each other.

If your newbie wasn't a kitten, I'd say to let them go at it one time. I think the trouble is that the older cat hasn't been able to see that the kitten isn't really a threat (size wise). But I don't know how that can be tested without putting the kitten at risk.

You might have to rehome the kitten if that's possible. There are times I wish I hadn't brought the stray cat in, because my older cat isn't enjoying his senior years as much as he would if he was still a solo cat.

Good luck!

[herding cats]

16. Aww, I'm so sorry.

I know the feeling. My geriatric kitty was livid with me (this is many years ago and both have since passed at ripe old ages) when I brought in a dumped on me kitty.

I got lucky and the new kitty was a nurturer who decided he'd be her project and eventually they acclimated. But, that doesn't always happen. Like this situation... I'm not seeing that here. Time will tell and I'm going to put in the hard work, but it's looking grim as of now.

[More_Cowbell]

39. I'm crossing my fingers for your cats, though!

I'd hoped that mine would become pals, but it's not to be. But yours certainly still might.

[magicarpet]

12. Move out of the house and take up quarters in the shed,...

.... if you by chance have one. If not set up a tent in the backyard and position it as far from the house as possible. Take up residence in the tent.

Put the Siamese cat's name on the deed to the property and have the locks changed. Give the only working key to the new queen of the house.

This should placate the grumpy kitty. With any luck, in time,... she maybe more forgiving of the new cat and your recent transgressions.

I am much surprised the Siamese cat did not change the door locks herself and just decide to lock you and your new chum kitty cat outside.

Best of luck to you - I hope you don't find the backyard tent too cramped or solitary. Look on the bright side,... you will likely not hear the cat howling in the house from your new quarters way out in the backyard pup tent,... a transistor radio turned on high might drown out the grumpy cat noise.

[herding cats]

17. Oh! I'm crying here!! 😂

I seriously needed that laugh having dealt with taking new kitty fresh water and being hissed at by the Siamese for my transgression. Bad, bad things are going to happen if I fall asleep in this house tonight. I've been warned.

The tent is a definite possibility. It actually sounds more attractive than my current living arrangements. Cramped I can survive, a vindictive Siamese, probably not judging by her current level of anger at me.

If deeding the property over to the cat would pacify her, I'm in! At this point I'd try anything. Hopefully she'll let me use a water hose to bathe and maybe even grant me an extension cord from her new castle? I may need it for a white noise sound machine to make sure I can finally get some rest.

[FuzzyRabbit]

19. This article may help introduce your cats to each other.

I have used this method successfully twice. However, be aware that the two kitty cats may never become close pals, but they will probably tolerate each other. One pair of my cats, after acclimating to each other, would both sleep on my bed with me even though the older cat (female) never quite took to the younger one (male).

It's important to give the old cat lots of extra attention.

https://www.petmd.com/cat/training/evr_ct_how-to-introduce-cats

[CountMyVote4Reality]

24. Great Article. Brilliant Summation.

Thank you.

[herding cats]

26. That's an amazing article!

I thank you!

One big strike against me is my hubby accidentally let the new kitty in on day one and the ladies met rough. I'm deeply hoping I can mitigate that error with some of the other tactics.

My thanks to you! ❤️

[CountMyVote4Reality]

21. Have you ever tried Feliway?

Part 1 - In short, it mimics a mother cat's natural pheromones to help restore harmony. You'll need a diffuser and a 30-day supply unit. You'll want the multi-cat version.
https://www.chewy.com/feliway-multicat-30-day-starter-kit/dp/121802

I have brother/sister siblings that I got at 10 weeks. When they got excited, they would release that energy by scratching the nearest surface they could sink their claws into. Of course, I have multiple scratching posts, etc. in every room with a rug or upholstery, but when they've got to scratch, they are going to let it out. The Feliway did calm them down so that the designated scratching surfaces were enough. I eventually stopped, but am going to start it up again for a different reason.

As kittens, they used to roughhouse quite a bit. They were not that different in size. Now they are almost 4yo and the roughhousing is always initiated by the male who has grown substantially larger than his sister. She's spayed. He's neutered. I don't want to hijack this thread with my problem. If anyone does have a comment about it, please PM me, but I am going back to Feliway.

The Feliway can get pricey month after month, but keep an eye out for when various pet suppliers put it on sale. At times it can be found for less than the Chewy auto-ship discount.

Part 2 - Do you have access to "My Cat From Hell?" It used to be on Animal Planet and is probably in the Discovery+ library. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Cat_from_Hell

Your situation was frequently covered. As I recall, the socialization began around the feeding ritual with an unpassable barrier between the two "feuding" cats. Your Siamese will know that her perceived rival is on the other side of the door. Over time she will learn or decide which feeling she wants to act on, hunger or defense. And each week or few days depending on progress, the barrier is gradually broken down and the feeding bowls are brought further together.

The playtime exercises proposed in previous posts were also part of Jackson Galaxy's 'Play. Eat. Sleep.' cat cycle.

[herding cats]

27. Hmm, that sounds like a decent option here.

My (formerly) sweet Siamese might respond and it's worth a try. I really, deeply want peace and love in my home amongst them. At the very least peace.

[PSPS]

23. Introducing a new kitty

Sounds like the kitty belongs to someone who is likely frantically looking for it. Ask neighbors and watch for posters in the neighborhood. But, if it turns out that you've been adopted by new kitty, here are some tips from someone (me) who has been through this numerous times:

Cats live in a world of scents. Your new kitty "smells different" and will elicit "objections" from your existing kitty. So pick a "safe room" where new kitty will stay for a week or so and keep the door closed. Your existing kitty will smell the new kitty under the door and hiss,
growl, etc. New kitty may do the same on its side of the door. After a few days, some "scent mixing" will have occurred and new kitty will become less "different" and existing kitty's reaction will become more muted. Next step is to prop the door open enough for them to see each other but not get through. More objections, but much less so since they've become used to the other's scent. More scent mixing. Next is the "batting through the door opening" stage, which becomes a playful pastime for them. Finally, you can open the door and, after some modest objections, they'll be playfully chasing each other around the house!

[herding cats]

28. This is smart and follows some of the best advice I've read so far.

I'm trying, now, to integrate our scents. I'm hoping it helps.

[FuzzyRabbit]

25. Gabapentin!

My current kitty cat, Milo, was still mostly feral when I first got him. His veterinarian gave him a prescription for Gabapentin capsules. Since he would tear my arms off if I tried to give him a pill, I mixed it with his food (canned food). After doing this twice a day for a couple weeks, he settled down and is now well behaved.

Gabapentin also helped my sister's cat when she (the cat) first moved into my sister's house and freaked out at any noise. One dose is all it took to calm her (the cat) down.

[herding cats]

30. Thank you! I'll ask my vet.

I know nothing about it before this moment!

[Bayard]

31. Rescue Remedy

Its an herbal calmative, good for most mammals. You can find it at any herbal store, or order online. It can be a life saver.

[herding cats]

33. I'll look it up!

Thank you! I've never heard of it before. ❤️

[Duppers]

37. Chewy has it too.

[applegrove]

34. Keep them on either side of a closed door. They'll try and smell and see each other underneath the

closed door. On day 2 the paws will try and bat each other. On day three they'll be dying to see each other and you can open the door. That is how it worked for me.

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

35. Some years back I had two kitties, who had finally learned to get along.

Then a stray showed up in our front yard who had clearly decided we were her last chance at life. So we took her in. She had no idea there were other cats in the house, and was quite distressed when she learned about them. The adjustment period was rather difficult. I'd come home and find lots of fur on the upstairs hallway, and cats separated from each other. They really were not getting along.

Then my marriage came to an end, and I moved to another part of the country, bringing all three cats with me. They were suddenly moved from a two story house with a full basement, a total of 3,000 square feet, to a much smaller place: one level, less than a thousand square feet. They were suddenly confronted with each other all the time, every day. And they immediately adjusted. Got along, mainly by pretending no other cat was there, even when all three were curled up on my bed together.

Right now I have a cat I adopted nearly two years ago, when I realized the pandemic shut down meant I wasn't going to be travelling much. Great cat. I also have a part time cat who officially belongs to people across from the street, but who now shows up every morning to be fed, and spends the next eight or more hours sleeping in my house. After the afternoon feed, he leaves and (I assume) goes home to his other family. I feel slightly guilty about taking him in, but he's a very sweet and affectionate cat, and he and my other cat get along quite well.

Honestly, I am a crazy cat lady in the making.

[Ziggysmom]

36. I love Jackson Galaxy ❤️ His methods usually succeed.

[Duppers]

38. +10

[herding cats]

41. Thank you! I've been adopting his methods.

More this video here:

https://m.

So far so good! I'm already to moving base camp and they eat outside a closed door to each other every meal now. I messed up once and they made eye contact (the door wasn't latched and the front door was opened leading to the door opening), which resulted in simple hisses, no insanity (yay!) and the door was very quickly closed and everyone went right back to dinner.

I think, eventually, they'll integrate. We have much less 'honey badger' level now and just two ladies trying to figure this whole transition going on.

Thank you! ❤️

[Rebl2]

40. I have found

two female cat’s together do NOT get along. At least that has been my experience. It stressed the kitties out as well as me, and to the point I wished I hadn’t gotten the second cat. When ever I left the house I had to put one in a room by herself for her own safety. If you get two together when they are kittens (litter mates or not) I think they probably get along better. She is letting the kitten know she is queen of this house.

[canetoad]

42. Smear butter

On one of them. Let the other cleanup. Not too much of course.

[herding cats]

43. I'm not entirely convinced my old cat won't just consider that seasoning at this point?

But, once she's a bit more acclimated it not a bad idea.

For example, before I began to get a handle on this, my hands and arms look like I've been pruning a 4 acre rose garden without gauntlet gloves. That was just for smelling like the new kitty. Things escalated before they've finally began to improve a little bit.

Tonight I have one new, small, and shallow, 4 claw piercing on my wrist. We're making progress here. I'll take it!