And God Created Canada

[ConcernedCanuk]

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Finally a joke that explains what it's like to be Canadian..


Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the archangel found him, resting on the seventh day. He inquired of God, "Where have you been? "


God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look Michael, look what I've made." Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said,


"What is it?"


"It's a planet," replied God," and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a place of great balance. Balance? inquired Michael.


Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people," God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."


The Archangel, impressed by Gods work, then pointed to a large landmass in the top corner and asked, What's that one?



Ah, said God. That's Canada, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful mountains, lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite coastline.

The people from Canada are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard working and high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace.


I'm also going to give them super-human, undefeatable ice hockey players who will be admired and feared by all who come across them.


Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed;


"What about balance, God? You said there will be BALANCE!"


God replied wisely.


"Wait until you see the loud-mouth bastards I'm putting next to them...."

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I posted this over 8 years ago on DU -

you might find some of the comments entertaining.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x2923486

CC

[TreasonousBastard]

1. From back then you might have run across...

Canadian World Domination-- Generals Claire and Debbie taking care of the loud-mouthed bastards, and then the world. In a very Canadian way.

The original site is gone off to history, but someone saved as much of it as they could. Would be nice if some of the more hilarious graphics were also saved, but ya get the idea.

http://www.standingonguard.com/

[ConcernedCanuk]

2. nope - never run across that

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did a quick peek at your link



that was interesting,

but from my quick peek, it appears to be something the "Onion" would create.

I do not think it's our "master" plan . . .



CC

[angstlessk]

3. Hell, I am an American...and agree totally

we are loud mouth bastards.