Did I read that sign right?
E-mail from my friend! 
Did I read that sign right?
TOILET OUT OF ORDER.
PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW.
In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES:
PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES
WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT.
In a London department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE
STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE
BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS
WILL BE TAKEN
In an office:
AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD
EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND
UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD.
Outside a secondhand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES,
WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT
BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park (I sure hope so)
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN
AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS
A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS
TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE,
BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET
WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS.
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING.
(PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)
Proofreading is a dying art,
wouldn't you say?
Man Kills Self Before Shooting
Wife and Daughter.
This one I caught in the SGV Tribune
the other day and called the Editorial
Room and asked who wrote this.
It took two or three readings before
the editor realized that what he was
reading was impossible!!!
They put in a correction the next day.
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash,
Expert Says
Really? Ya think?
Police Begin Campaign
to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that's taking things a bit far!
-----------------------------------------------------------
Panda Mating Fails;
Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
---------------------------------------------------------------
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!
------------------------------------------------------
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!
-----------------------------------------------
War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
----------------------------------------------------------------
If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly,
It May Last Awhile
Ya think?!
------------------------------------------------------------------
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!
----------------------------------------------------------------
Enfield (London) Couple Slain;
Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!
------------------------------------------------------------------
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there's something
stronger than duct tape?
----------------------------------------------------------
Man Struck By Lightning:
Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge!
----------------------------------------------
New Study of Obesity
Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren't they fat enough?!
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That's what he gets for eating those beans!
---------------- ---------------------------------
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?
****************************************
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!
***************************************************
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
*******************************************
And the winner is....
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Did I read that right?
***************************************************
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity
and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to ...
(maybe even a chuckle).
We all need a good laugh, at least once a day!
= new reply since forum marked as read
One time I was in a small town and walked by a small card table in front of the store with a sign that said "World Famous Discount Table".
Wasn't sure if the owner was delusional, ambitious or ironic.
Nice meeting you! 
Funny stuff!
