Mon Dec 17, 2018, 12:05 AM
lambchopp59 (2,633 posts)
Stop me if you've heard this one
Donald Trump, Oprah Winfrey, Barack Obama and a young school girl are on a flight when disaster strikes the plane and all occupants must parachute to safety, but there are only three parachutes. Oprah Winfrey says "I'm the richest woman in the world", grabs a pack and bails. "I had the greatest electoral college victory ever" spits Trump, grabs another pack and follows Oprah. Barack Obama turns to the school child and says "You are the future, our country's best hope" and begins to outfit the child with a pack, when the girl states "actually there's a future for you, too. Mr Trump jumped with my book bag".
|
16 replies, 4350 views
![]() |
Author | Time | Post |
![]() |
lambchopp59 | Dec 2018 | OP |
spooky3 | Dec 2018 | #1 | |
Doreen | Dec 2018 | #2 | |
efhmc | Dec 2018 | #3 | |
StarryNite | Dec 2018 | #4 | |
rickyhall | Dec 2018 | #5 | |
Honeycombe8 | Dec 2018 | #6 | |
3catwoman3 | Dec 2018 | #7 | |
PatrickforO | Dec 2018 | #8 | |
rusty quoin | Dec 2018 | #9 | |
grantcart | Dec 2018 | #11 | |
Jim Lane | Dec 2018 | #14 | |
lambchopp59 | Dec 2018 | #15 | |
hermetic | Dec 2018 | #10 | |
Different Drummer | Dec 2018 | #12 | |
Jim Lane | Dec 2018 | #13 | |
lambchopp59 | Dec 2018 | #16 |
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 12:07 AM
spooky3 (32,053 posts)
1. thanks for the laugh! nt
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 12:49 AM
efhmc (14,305 posts)
3. Very clever.
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 12:58 AM
StarryNite (8,761 posts)
4. Good one!
![]() |
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 01:11 AM
rickyhall (4,889 posts)
5. Made day/night!
![]() |
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 01:48 AM
Honeycombe8 (37,648 posts)
6. Good one. (But Oprah wouldn't do that.) nt
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 01:52 AM
3catwoman3 (22,189 posts)
7. "Tis a consummation...
...devoutly to be wished.
|
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 02:19 AM
PatrickforO (14,002 posts)
8. Wonderful!
That made my night.
|
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 03:11 AM
rusty quoin (6,133 posts)
9. I don't get it. Why would Oprah let a school age girl die? She's not bad.
Response to rusty quoin (Reply #9)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 03:09 PM
Jim Lane (11,175 posts)
14. I agree.
When I heard the joke (see #13), the pilot came back into the passenger cabin. He said that his survival was important so that he could help in the investigation of the mishap, so he took the first parachute. The version with Oprah maligns her and doesn't account for the presence of the pilot.
|
Response to rusty quoin (Reply #9)
Tue Dec 18, 2018, 11:13 AM
lambchopp59 (2,633 posts)
15. Oprah only utilized as a card in the Trump's greed deck, a ruse
at the heat of the moment for the Donald to hastily join, on top of Trump's non-recognition of the "book bag". No offense meant towards Oprah, wonderful person I'd love to meet and have coffee with, wouldn't just about anyone? I re-iterated the joke with characters the military.com site had. Joke would work just as well with say, Bill Gates.
I think Oprah would be big enough to have a good belly laugh even at a bit of her expense. ![]() |
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 11:41 AM
hermetic (7,716 posts)
10. Heh heh heh
I liked that.
|
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 01:21 PM
Different Drummer (6,551 posts)
12. Good one! Too bad it's not based on actual events. n/t
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Mon Dec 17, 2018, 03:00 PM
Jim Lane (11,175 posts)
13. I heard it years ago with Henry Kissinger in the starring role.
He says, "My survival is essential to guiding U.S. foreign policy and achieving peace in the Middle East. Besides that, I am, of course, the smartest man in the world." Out he goes. The Pope (not Obama) then says to the hippie (not a school girl) that the younger person should take the last parachute, to which the hippie replies, "Hey, Padre, that's real cool of you, but, like, not to worry, y'know? The smartest man in the world just jumped out of the airplane with my backpack on."
It would be interesting to set up a self-esteem contest between Kissinger and Trump. |
Response to lambchopp59 (Original post)
Tue Dec 18, 2018, 11:23 AM
lambchopp59 (2,633 posts)
16. No offense meant towards Oprah
Oprah only utilized as a card in the Trump's greed deck, a ruse at the heat of the moment for the Donald to hastily join, on top of Trump's non-recognition of the "book bag". No offense meant towards Oprah, wonderful person I'd love to meet and have coffee with, wouldn't just about anyone? I re-iterated the joke with characters the military.com site had. Joke would work just as well with say, Bill Gates.
I think Oprah would be big enough to have a good belly laugh even at a bit of her expense, so would Bill. |