just shut up.

[redqueen]

Long, but so well worth reading.

http://gyzym.tumblr.com/post/39004853136/just-shut-up

...

But consuming media critically is a skill, and in an age where media is more prevalent than ever before, it’s a skill worth having. It’s a skill worth having because you are going to continue to be exposed to media, and it is going to continue to attempt to manipulate you. It’s a skill worth having because it makes it less difficult to see people talking shit about things you like, not more. It’s a skill worth having because some of the shit being taught en masse by media is horrible scary damaging shit, and maybe you don’t think you’ve learned that horrible scary damaging shit, and maybe you don’t think you’re susceptible to that horrible scary damaging shit, and honestly? Maybe you haven’t. Maybe you’re not. I don’t know you. But I know that a classroom full of average southern Ohio state school students went silent in horror at the full realization of what Beauty and the Beast teaches kids too young to know better. I know that as someone who has spent years being taught to analyze media, as someone who has actively worked to develop the skill of understanding what a given film is attempting to wring from me, I still want to see Hugh Grant kiss Martine McCutcheon. I know that the real trick to the continued, pervasive prevalence of shit like rape culture is that it’s everywhere all the time, slipped in under the radar and riding on the fact that it’s the status quo, hidden in plain goddamn sight.

We can argue for media that doesn’t push the horrible shit we need to unlearn as a society to get to a healthier place, or we can point out the flaws in our preexisting media, or we can do both. But “Just shut up,” isn’t an option. “Just shut up,” can’t be an option, because we can’t keep playing the “Nobody told me because nobody told them,” card. Nothing will ever get better that way. Nothing will ever improve if we keep not telling people this shit. And yes, it’s easier not to watch things critically. Yes, it’s easier not to engage with this stuff. Yes, as always, “Not learning things,” is the easier option. And if you don’t want to learn things (or unlearn them, as the case may be), that’s your right. That’s your call, and nobody can stop you from making it. It’s entirely possible to like and even love problematic media while consuming it critically, while acknowledging its flaws, but if that’s not something you wish to figure out then that’s that, and there ain’t shit anybody can do about it. But for the love of god, stop arguing that people should be quiet, should stop pointing this stuff out, should stop engaging with something in a way you don’t want them to. For one thing, you’re wasting your breath—again, it’s the age of the internet. People are going to use their platforms as they please. But for another thing, there’s a huge difference between saying, “I don’t feel like dealing with this problem,” and saying, “I don’t feel like dealing with this problem and therefore no one else should either.” One of them is a personal choice, and the other is embarrassingly irresponsible. I’ll leave it up to you to work out where the chips fall on that one.

Emphasis mine.

[ismnotwasm]

1. Teaching myself to see the world

Through a feminist filter was a long, often painful process. And necessary. Like this young women, there were no feminist role models for me, only life experiences--some very ugly--and opinions built on them. Thank god I liked to read.

It's one of the reasons I don't watch much TV, and have odd taste in movies. I pick my battles in media, choosing to reject a lot of it, depending on the stupid quotient--say "Sex and the City" and that ridiculous (to me) obsession with shoes, among its other flaws. I can watch and enjoy some equal opportunity stupid, or simply something ironic about life and the way we live it that because it takes the sting out, just a bit.

A feminist filter, much like a liberal, or progressive or Democratic one, has a huge influence not only what I think but how I think. Like any other filter depending on circumstances, (only much more so) a feminism filter can leave you isolated. Which is why, I think social media, with all its flaws has has helped feminist causes with young women blogging, Facebooking, organizing, connecting. Exchanging ideas.

And We get to be global.

Women like this blogger (women everywhere)are under tremendous pressure to conform to conventional ideas, it's like walking through a long mirrored hall with many slightly different doors you and your self image is constantly reflected back to you, who you are, the choices you make-- or even have. What door to open.

Shutting up isn't an option. Everything I am comes from that filter, a filter that includes a lot of self reflection, in fact, the lions share of societal reflection in matters of gender rests on any feminist, because we started the fire, we force the dialog, in a terribly sexist and misogynist society. I agree with this young woman so much, and I'm happy she is able to articulate what she did so well, in the terms she did. What I like best is she is seemingly lighthearted in tone yet she packs a powerful message.

[seabeyond]

2. "while my professor’s eye twitched in muted horror" bah haha. been there.

I don’t know about you, but when I was a child, nobody sat down with me after I watched Beauty and the Beast and said, “Okay, this is a movie, and it’s okay to enjoy this movie! It’s okay to think this movie is great! But just so you know, if someone in real life did to you the things the Beast does to Belle, that wouldn’t be okay. That wouldn’t be right.” When my mind was young and malleable, there was no trusted adult pointing out, “This is a movie, and it’s okay to like this movie, but the relationship it shows is unhealthy.” And that’s not because I didn’t have those trusted adults in my life! I was lucky enough to grow up with two intelligent, liberal, kind, forward-thinking, active parents; they didn’t tell me because they didn’t know to tell me. They didn’t tell me because nobody told them.

But “Just shut up,” isn’t an option. “Just shut up,” can’t be an option, because we can’t keep playing the “Nobody told me because nobody told them,” card. Nothing will ever get better that way. Nothing will ever improve if we keep not telling people this shit. And yes, it’s easier not to watch things critically. Yes, it’s easier not to engage with this stuff. Yes, as always, “Not learning things,” is the easier option.

this was such a good article redq. and i was the parent that whatever the kids or (nieces/nephews) watched, and i was way particular on what they watched, whenever any of this stuff came up, i pointed it out. and still do. and i know that

i know just what this writer is talking about.

hey... now, lets talk gangs of new york.

i tease.