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skip fox
skip fox's Journal
skip fox's Journal
September 11, 2013
Bill (“They ‘wish my mother had been on the pill’? What the heck does that mean???) O’Reilly is saying: “No, no, no! . . . I’ dead serious, Colmes. . . . If Obama says it will be ‘an unbelievably small air-strike against Syria, that obviously means he’s planning on bombing midgets! . . . I know! I know! . . . He’s going to bomb Syrian Midgetville. . . . where they got all these little buildings and cars and midget horses and stuff . . . and toilets the size of thimbles and tattoo parlors that can fit in a shoebox . . . and soon all these little body parts scattered all over the place. . . You laugh, but I’m dead serious, Colmes. . . . In fact I’ve never been more serious about anything my entire life! . . . And you know me!"
First thought, already too late. . . . Please come CAPTION Bill O'Reilly!!!!!
Bill (“They ‘wish my mother had been on the pill’? What the heck does that mean???) O’Reilly is saying: “No, no, no! . . . I’ dead serious, Colmes. . . . If Obama says it will be ‘an unbelievably small air-strike against Syria, that obviously means he’s planning on bombing midgets! . . . I know! I know! . . . He’s going to bomb Syrian Midgetville. . . . where they got all these little buildings and cars and midget horses and stuff . . . and toilets the size of thimbles and tattoo parlors that can fit in a shoebox . . . and soon all these little body parts scattered all over the place. . . You laugh, but I’m dead serious, Colmes. . . . In fact I’ve never been more serious about anything my entire life! . . . And you know me!"
September 10, 2013
?8
Bill-O: "Ah, Bernie, whatsa matter? Somebody say something mean to you? You gonna cry?"
Bernie: "Is that why you have me on your show? Just to make fun of me and taunt me?"
Bill-O "Let's see those waterworks, Bern. Let's see how a big boy cries!"
Bernie: "Why are you being so mean? I'm always nice to you! . . Why? . . Oh why?"
Bill-O: "Because you need it done, bucko. You got this whine at low burn all over your face everytime I see you. Makes me want to give you a slap."
Bernie: "WHaaaaaa!. . . WHaaaaaa!"
Bill-O: "Freakin' baby! . . . You should learn to grow up and be a mature adult like me. . . Careful you don't p*ss yourself."
The duet:
?8
Bill-O: "Ah, Bernie, whatsa matter? Somebody say something mean to you? You gonna cry?"
Bernie: "Is that why you have me on your show? Just to make fun of me and taunt me?"
Bill-O "Let's see those waterworks, Bern. Let's see how a big boy cries!"
Bernie: "Why are you being so mean? I'm always nice to you! . . Why? . . Oh why?"
Bill-O: "Because you need it done, bucko. You got this whine at low burn all over your face everytime I see you. Makes me want to give you a slap."
Bernie: "WHaaaaaa!. . . WHaaaaaa!"
Bill-O: "Freakin' baby! . . . You should learn to grow up and be a mature adult like me. . . Careful you don't p*ss yourself."
September 10, 2013
?8
Bill ("Why am I always surrounded by idiots?"
O'Reilly is saying: "Bernie, Bernie, Bernie. . . . Obama should want to come on The Factor for a fair-and-balanced interview. . . . And you know I'd give him just that! . . . I only want to ask him why he has not yet resigned over the Benghazi Affair, or why there should not be impeachment charges brought against him for using the Post Office to stifle opposition, or why he's not in federal court answering charges of malfeasance, criminal mischief, and accessory to murder for the other actions he has taken world-wide. . . . In fact, it's in Obama's interest to come onto The Factor and clear these matters up. . . . He should jump at the chance!!! . . . Or am I missing something? . . . And you say?"
The Mother of All Deceptions!! Please come CAPTION Bill O'Reilly!!!
?8
Bill ("Why am I always surrounded by idiots?"
O'Reilly is saying: "Bernie, Bernie, Bernie. . . . Obama should want to come on The Factor for a fair-and-balanced interview. . . . And you know I'd give him just that! . . . I only want to ask him why he has not yet resigned over the Benghazi Affair, or why there should not be impeachment charges brought against him for using the Post Office to stifle opposition, or why he's not in federal court answering charges of malfeasance, criminal mischief, and accessory to murder for the other actions he has taken world-wide. . . . In fact, it's in Obama's interest to come onto The Factor and clear these matters up. . . . He should jump at the chance!!! . . . Or am I missing something? . . . And you say?"
September 10, 2013
George ("You talkin' to me?" Zimmerman is saying: “Listen, I’m aware that a number of people are saying that I’m flying out of control. . . . Just because I got picked up for speeding in Texas, punched my wife’s dad, threatened her with my .38, and walk around the house with my hand on my gun’s grip telling people to ‘Come on, get a bit closer. . . Just let me see you get a bit closer!’ doesn’t mean I’m flying out of control. . . . Next they'll say letting off a warning shots in traffic to lessen my road rage, is evidence I'm losing it. . . . Geez."
"Come on. Just get a bit closer!". . . Please come CAPTION George Zimmerman!!!
George ("You talkin' to me?"
Zimmerman is saying: “Listen, I’m aware that a number of people are saying that I’m flying out of control. . . . Just because I got picked up for speeding in Texas, punched my wife’s dad, threatened her with my .38, and walk around the house with my hand on my gun’s grip telling people to ‘Come on, get a bit closer. . . Just let me see you get a bit closer!’ doesn’t mean I’m flying out of control. . . . Next they'll say letting off a warning shots in traffic to lessen my road rage, is evidence I'm losing it. . . . Geez."
September 9, 2013
Karl ("Only wimps let facts get in their way" Rove is saying: "Juan, I simply don't care if there is no evidence of interference in the protection of the Benghazi consulate and our ambassador, nor of deliberately planned misinformation on the administration's part, or any other malfeasance or even incompetence on the part of our government, I still say you're wrong, wrong, wrong!!!"
*********************************************
CAPTION is loosely (& comically?) based on the following Media Matters story:
http://mediamatters.org/blog/2013/09/08/foxs-karl-rove-shouts-lies-about-benghazi/195773
What's that smell??? . . . Please come CAPTION Karl Rove!!!
Karl ("Only wimps let facts get in their way"
Rove is saying: "Juan, I simply don't care if there is no evidence of interference in the protection of the Benghazi consulate and our ambassador, nor of deliberately planned misinformation on the administration's part, or any other malfeasance or even incompetence on the part of our government, I still say you're wrong, wrong, wrong!!!"
*********************************************
CAPTION is loosely (& comically?) based on the following Media Matters story:
http://mediamatters.org/blog/2013/09/08/foxs-karl-rove-shouts-lies-about-benghazi/195773
September 8, 2013
Sarah (The one-woman think tank) Palin is saying: "Here's what I figure, Oprah, . . . we give all the federal and state prisoners carry permits and let them go at it. . . . We'd save on food and haircuts and stuff and we wouldn't have to worry about who was really guilty or who was wrongly convicted. . . . I mean, let God sort them out. . . . You know I've always been a religious woman. . . . Oprah? . . . Oprah?"
Oprah on pause. . . Please come CAPTION Sarah Palin!!!!
Sarah (The one-woman think tank) Palin is saying: "Here's what I figure, Oprah, . . . we give all the federal and state prisoners carry permits and let them go at it. . . . We'd save on food and haircuts and stuff and we wouldn't have to worry about who was really guilty or who was wrongly convicted. . . . I mean, let God sort them out. . . . You know I've always been a religious woman. . . . Oprah? . . . Oprah?"
September 8, 2013
Ted ("Drunk with stupidity" Cruz is saying: "Only a fool would bring politics up at a time like this, George. . . . The vote on weather or not to attack Syria will be the most important one that many of my colleagues will ever have to face. . . . But let me say this, if he does attack without congressional approval, he will be demonstrating once more the arrogant disregard of the American people that we've seen time after time, in Benghazi, with Obamacare, at the IRS, with so-called emergency appointments, by arming drug cartels, in supporting the Arab Spring, etc., etc., and he should be immediately impeached!"
The language of the rut. . . . Please come CAPTION Ted Cruz!!!!
Ted ("Drunk with stupidity"
Cruz is saying: "Only a fool would bring politics up at a time like this, George. . . . The vote on weather or not to attack Syria will be the most important one that many of my colleagues will ever have to face. . . . But let me say this, if he does attack without congressional approval, he will be demonstrating once more the arrogant disregard of the American people that we've seen time after time, in Benghazi, with Obamacare, at the IRS, with so-called emergency appointments, by arming drug cartels, in supporting the Arab Spring, etc., etc., and he should be immediately impeached!"
September 8, 2013
Howard ("Who am I today?" Kurtz is saying, "I did a lengthy analysis and it just so happens that of all the major news outlets, and I'm including papers and national blogs, only Fox News and Drudge got the story right! . . . Who would have guessed?"
Trading in his stripes for spots. . . . Please come CAPTION Howard Kurtz.
Howard ("Who am I today?"
Kurtz is saying, "I did a lengthy analysis and it just so happens that of all the major news outlets, and I'm including papers and national blogs, only Fox News and Drudge got the story right! . . . Who would have guessed?"
September 7, 2013
Rush Revere and the Brave Pilgrims, Chapter One, page 1.:
Rush Revere had been raised on The Bible and clean laundry. He never tried to stick his foot in his mouth, and he didn't tickle other boys. One bright morning at the groaning table, Rush asked his dimpled mother, "Why do the other kids make fun of me all the time?"
Mrs. Revere looked kindly down at her son and said, "Because they're jealous of you always being right."
Cute, chunky Rush then asked, "May I please have some more corporal punishment? . . . Please??"
Mrs. Revere slowly spread he hands over her wide belly beneath the apron and replied, "Finish your breakfast first dear. There's three platefuls of sausage left and two dozen hardboiled eggs, beside the tub of oatmeal. . . . Your father will be down soon."
Plump as Puddin' Rush was overjoyed. "Maybe he'll use the heft-mallet this time!"
Chuckling, Mrs. Revere quipped, "You can never tell, dear."
No head? No Heart? No problem! Please come PROVIDE A READING FROM Rush Limbaugh's tome!!!
Rush Revere and the Brave Pilgrims, Chapter One, page 1.:
Rush Revere had been raised on The Bible and clean laundry. He never tried to stick his foot in his mouth, and he didn't tickle other boys. One bright morning at the groaning table, Rush asked his dimpled mother, "Why do the other kids make fun of me all the time?"
Mrs. Revere looked kindly down at her son and said, "Because they're jealous of you always being right."
Cute, chunky Rush then asked, "May I please have some more corporal punishment? . . . Please??"
Mrs. Revere slowly spread he hands over her wide belly beneath the apron and replied, "Finish your breakfast first dear. There's three platefuls of sausage left and two dozen hardboiled eggs, beside the tub of oatmeal. . . . Your father will be down soon."
Plump as Puddin' Rush was overjoyed. "Maybe he'll use the heft-mallet this time!"
Chuckling, Mrs. Revere quipped, "You can never tell, dear."
September 7, 2013
Glenn ("Parsing the hair floating on a fart from a flea's ass" Beck is saying: "Listen, even you bozos at The New York Times Magazine should be able to figure this out. . . . I never, not once, called for Obama's impeachment!!! . . . Not even close . . . Calling for a special counsel to explore the possibility of impeaching Obama over his handling, or rather not handling, of the Benghazi affair is not, I repeat not, calling for his impeachment!!! . . . . Neither is demanding his impeachment for orchestrating the Boston bombings! . . . Or telling the Tea Party that impeachment doesn't go far enough! . . . They're not even close! . . . You guys the guts to print that?"
Flatulent is as flatulent does. Please come CAPTION Head Wreck!!!
Glenn ("Parsing the hair floating on a fart from a flea's ass"
Beck is saying: "Listen, even you bozos at The New York Times Magazine should be able to figure this out. . . . I never, not once, called for Obama's impeachment!!! . . . Not even close . . . Calling for a special counsel to explore the possibility of impeaching Obama over his handling, or rather not handling, of the Benghazi affair is not, I repeat not, calling for his impeachment!!! . . . . Neither is demanding his impeachment for orchestrating the Boston bombings! . . . Or telling the Tea Party that impeachment doesn't go far enough! . . . They're not even close! . . . You guys the guts to print that?"
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