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Member since: Wed Aug 20, 2003, 09:49 AM
Number of posts: 9,854

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When ideals collide... porn vs. feminism

I have found the entire porn debate that has been going on lately fascinating on several levels. It has got me wondering about how we all rank our progressive ideals differently. For some, First Amendment rights are paramount. Anything that smacks of limiting free speech is anathema. For others, the welfare of women is their primary focus and anything that objectifies women is the worst thing. Then there are those who just want to enjoy their porn without pondering it's political ramifications.

Here's what I wonder....Can there be a Progressive Theory of Everything where ALL the tenets important to a progressive agenda work cohesively? Or do we always have to triage our interests and place our concerns in the order they speak to us most? Can Free Speech (I don't know why I always feel compelled to capitalize 'Free Speech', but I do) live side by side with a concern for the objectification and minimizing of women?

It seems like each side of this issue is defending their position based on important progressive ideals. But what is the MOST important progressive ideal? What comes first? For me, it is along the lines of 'do no harm'. Free speech? Damn straight. As long as it doesn't potentially harm someone else.

P.S. I recognize that feminism and pornography are not mutually exclusive. I was trying in my title to succinctly represent the two sides I see being discussed the most.

My husband wonders why I don't like watching football with him

Could it be that listening to him scream at the TV for three solid hours is not as much fun as he might think?

If the constant bombardment of ACA negativity is taking its toll on ME

...somebody who is a liberal and who desperately wants affordable health insurance coverage, what do we think it is doing to the average person? Hardly anybody I know in person has an even remotely positive view of this thing. At first I kept telling myself that the site would get fixed, people would start to benefit and everybody would chill out. But now, every day right here I see stories that make me think that it isn't going to work, it is going to be a giant clusterfuck and it is going to drag our previously bright chances for 2014 and 2016 into a hole with it.

Can somebody talk me off my ledge? Is there a silver lining here?? I think the main thing that is worrying me now are some of the comments about ACA plans paying doctors less, so fewer doctors will bother being in these networks. People are going to be PISSED if they cannot keep their doctor or have a very hard time finding doctors to take their ACA approved insurance plans.

What future does America have?

I have never been one of those people who think the country is going to hell in a handbasket and wails about 'the fall of Rome' blah blah blah.

Until now.

As mentioned in another thread, the ACA is possibly in deep trouble. Republicans are poised to begin picking it apart until nothing worth having is left. If public support remains low, Dems are going to start joining in to save their seats.

That sucks for healthcare reform, but has much, much more dire implications. How does this country govern itself with a system as broken as this? How do we move forward when the opposition party is so damned determined to go BACKWARDS as far as it can and, whether we want to admit it or not, uses the system brilliantly against progress?

I have always told my children that progressiveness would win in the end because social progress is the only way for a civilized society to survive. But I reckoned without an entire political party led by a ruling class that doesn't mind the country failing.

That's the other thing I am starting to believe in: A ruling class.

The Progressive Abortion Purity Test

I would like to apologize for my 'Yea, Abortion!!' thread that got pulled. It actually wasn't intended to be flamebait, I was trying to make a point; but it was poorly made and I understand why it was pulled.

That said, as a woman who has had an abortion and who has known other women who have had abortions, every single one of us came out of the experience with slightly differing emotions....or vastly differing emotions. I wish I had not had to have mine. I DO sometimes think about the child who might have been. What would they be like? Did I do the right thing? But what about the two kids I have now? Would that child have precluded their existence? I cannot go back and it's not like it is something I dwell on. Actually, the only time I think about it is when somebody on here brings abortion up.

Wendy Davis made a comment to the effect that she wished there was never a need for abortion. I understand that. I agree. I can't help it. It's how I feel. I understand that other people feel differently. So, which of us is RIGHT?? Well, there seem to be a lot of people here who think that they are equipped to make that judgment. If you are one of those people, you are wrong. No two people are going to feel the same and as long as they support the right to choose, they are progressive enough.

I strongly support the right to choose. I will fight tooth and nail to preserve this right for all women. This is a decision between a woman and herself. The end. ONLY the woman involved can understand what the choice means to her and whether it is the right choice for her. There should be no stigma attached to having made this choice. I am not ashamed of my abortion and in no way do I think other women should be ashamed.

But I have to say, I found myself sitting here crying when I was reading some of the responses to the Wendy Davis thread. While I am not ashamed of my decision, it was not easy. i think it was probably the right choice. I was not equipped at 19 to be a mother either emotionally or financially. Maybe if I had never had children, I wouldn't think about it. I don't know.

I feel like there are people here for whom it is not enough to just support the right to choose. They land on every thread about abortion letting us all know that abortion is no biggie...a positive choice...and making those of us who think differently feel as if we are not quite good enough progressives.

Is anybody else tired?

God, I am tired.

I feel like the more informed I am, the harder it is to just go about my daily life. I want to scream in the middle of the grocery store, "IS ANYBODY ELSE PAYING ATTENTION?? WE ARE BEING FUCKED OVER EVERY DAY AND YOU ARE ALL HERE JUST TRYING TO DECIDE BETWEEN PIZZA OR MEXICAN FOR DINNER!!"

I am steadily losing Facebook friends because all I do any more is repost stuff from here or other political things I come across. And wandering around on the internet, which used to be a relaxing hobby for me, is just a minefield of scary shit. The more I know, the more I wish I didn't know....if that makes any sense.

It wears you down. Waking up every day this constant battle of them against us and they really ARE against us. All of us. Even the people they call their base. I used to feel like an observer that just sort of watched from the sidelines, but the last couple of years have really made me realize how close to home all that stuff that previously seemed so far away really is. We are still struggling to recover from the Major Fuck Up of '08 and now they are quietly putting together the next Major Fuck Up as fast as they can. Gutting Dodd-Frank, which didn't have that much guts to begin with? The TPP? Which I had never heard of until recently, but really seems like a shitty deal for us. And some of the guys doing this are my guys. I mean, it was hard enough when all I had to do was keep an eye on the other team. Now I feel like I have to watch my back with my own players.

I just don't think I have another Major Fuck Up recovery left in me. I am really tired.
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