General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: Is Republicanism a mental illness? [View all]DFW
(56,896 posts)EXCERPTS FROM THE OFFICIAL DICTIONARY OF REPUBLICANESE
In Republicanese, many words that sound alike may be spelled differently at random. A few prominent examples:
In Republicanese, the following words may be spelled at random using any of the three ways given:
A.) Two, Too, To
B.) Their, They're, There
c.) Your, Yore, You're
The Republicanese version of Robin Hood therefore starts with "In days of you're...."
The only rule is that the correct use of them as in English is never permitted twice in a row.
Words with single letters that change meaning when that letter is doubled must never be used in correct English context. The classic example is lose vs. loose. In Republicanese, if you do not win an election, then you loose that election. Conversely, if your (Republicanese: youre) belt is too tight, you need it more lose in order to be comfortable. Another example would be the Republicanese, I met Donald Trump, and he was rudder than I imagined, vs. I grabbed the ruder and was able to steer the boat to shore.
In English, the contraction for "it is" is written "it's." To show possession referring to something previously mentioned, one writes "its." In Republicanese, it is the other way around.
Example:
English: It's impractical for a building to have its solar panels in the basement.
Republicanese: Its impractical for a building to have it's solar panels in the basement.
In Republicanese, an apostrophe is used to form a plural, whereas this is never correct in English. But it must be done at random, never systematically. For example, Bill and Hillary are "the Clinton's," but Bill, Chelsea and Hillary are "the Clintons." The other way around is also correct. In Republicanese, either form is correct as long as it is not spelled the same way twice in a row.
Example:
In English, one writes "The Clintons like dogs."
In Republicanese, this can be written as "The Clinton's like dogs," or "The Clintons like dog's" or "The Clinton's like dog's." The only version that would be incorrect in Republicanese would be to use no apostrophe at all. Only English is written that way.