Regarding Steubenville: I find it frustrating and heartening at the same time [View all]

[Brickbat]

that people are feeling outrage, disgust and despair when they see the footage from the parties in Steubenville.

I find it heartening that once they see what "boys will be boys" really looks like, they realize that we should not allow smirking, drunkass criminals to define masculinity. We can expect better of our men and boys, and they can expect better for themselves.

I find it frustrating that it takes raw footage for some to begin to understand just how devastating and ugly the rape culture is. When we read about a situation in the paper or online, it's easy to imagine a quiet scene in a bedroom away from the main party where he goes a little too far as she's passing out -- something that we can safely put in the gray zone of "he said, she said" and shake our heads at. And those certainly happen.

But from now on, I encourage you all to remember the footage of Steubenville when reading about these cases -- the cackling instigators, the sniggering bros slapping each other on the back, the eyewitnesses and bystanders who said, "that's not cool" and then figured they had done their part. The complete lack of empathy. The contempt for another person. A failure from each of them.

Those of us working against the rape culture welcome you to the fight.