General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: So why exactly is "tone" or "approach" more important than actual issues that affect us all? [View all]ismnotwasm
(41,977 posts)When a major changes are finally, albeit still slowly, happening, with a struggle for specific groups that has been going on for decades, or centuries who, while they may or may not have had allies still had to fight every step of the way, through fear and pain and assault and death only to find they still have to fight for things they thought already won, tone doesn't mean that much.
People either are aware of the impact of century long struggles are or they are not, or more likely and more my point, if their own secure place in society is being challenged--there's a backlash. A request for politeness is a kind of "let me think about this" delaying tactic, usually combined or false comparisons to other stuggles, because people don't take the time to learn, or as human beings tend to do, learn only what supports our own opinion.
Tone means be quiet, don't argue, lighten up, stop being so Politically correct, wait; change will happen naturally, you've already archived equality what more do you what, it's your nature to be x, y, or z.
Every single oppressed group has heard these argument of tone, but In terms of gender we are dealing with societal expectations that are embedded in a patriartical heterosexist and heteronormative society.
Sometimes it takes a crowbar, not soft words to separate the true from false and for those who argue truth is subjective, I would reply not for human rights it isn't, not for standards of equality it isn't, and certainly not in the face of proprogated lies should truth EVER be spoken softly.