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Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin

(108,714 posts)

6. My brother took care of my mom the last 5 years of her life.

Reply to Nine (Original post)

Tue May 13, 2014, 12:34 AM

May 2014

Last edited Tue May 13, 2014, 09:28 PM - Edit history (1)

Because of the time spent he has a hard time finding steady work.

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51 replies

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A feminist issue - caregiving of elderly parents [View all] Nine May 2014 OP

It ended up being up to my brother, elleng May 2014 #1

I'm glad your family was able to find an arrangement that worked for all. (nt) Nine May 2014 #3

I cared for over 4 years after my dad after his stroke in 2000 FrodosPet May 2014 #38

It ended up being my BF's brother because of the exact same reasons. blueamy66 May 2014 #25

Sounds like you need frazzled May 2014 #2

Good advice KT2000 May 2014 #4

Do you have figures to back up your statement? Downwinder May 2014 #5

My brother took care of my mom the last 5 years of her life. Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin May 2014 #6

I know that feeling! FrodosPet May 2014 #39

I don't see it as a feminist issue Major Nikon May 2014 #7

"Most people in this country are still content with the traditional arrangement of the man being bettyellen May 2014 #18

The data just doesn't support your assertion Major Nikon May 2014 #20

I'm aware that the overall trend the past 50 years has moved women into the workplace. bettyellen May 2014 #21

Seems pretty evident that women prefer that arrangement Major Nikon May 2014 #22

It seems evident that you would like to believe that. You'd also like to believe the salary gap is bettyellen May 2014 #23

A pay gap study done by feminists puts it in the single digits Major Nikon May 2014 #27

Single digits, if it is that low- is not insignificant. bettyellen May 2014 #29

So basically your claim is your own perceptions trump competently conducted studies Major Nikon May 2014 #31

my perceptions line up perfectly what states found in their public sector jobs for the past 24 years bettyellen May 2014 #41

Strawman Major Nikon May 2014 #47

Like I said, there is no good data comparing compensation in the private sector. Got anything else? bettyellen May 2014 #49

So you want me to provide the proof of your assertion Major Nikon May 2014 #51

How can I get my little sis to quit wanting to be a SAHM? FrodosPet May 2014 #40

why do you think one woman- your sister- has ANYTHING to do with statistical trends? she doesn't. bettyellen May 2014 #42

Definitely not from money FrodosPet May 2014 #44

Good for her- I hope she is more successful than average with her plan to stay out of the job market bettyellen May 2014 #50

I think you have the causal link largely backwards. Donald Ian Rankin May 2014 #28

LOL, I don't know a single woman who "focused on homemaking". They stay home a few months bettyellen May 2014 #30

I cared for my mother-in-law and both of my parents. Frustratedlady May 2014 #8

I did the same with my mother. There was no one left standing, literally. CTyankee May 2014 #37

Here are some figures. Nine May 2014 #9

"Daughters are more than twice as likely as sons to become caregivers for their mothers." bettyellen May 2014 #19

Not only that, you're on your own for medical insurance, unless you're Medicare-eligible. That is, raccoon May 2014 #10

It's becoming more of an issue, for sure. laundry_queen May 2014 #11

I can't even pipi_k May 2014 #12

I have a guy friend PasadenaTrudy May 2014 #13

My sister is the "primary caregiver"... meaculpa2011 May 2014 #14

True by necessity in my family -- all women. politicat May 2014 #15

I must be an exception to your rule. pintobean May 2014 #16

it is an issue-not sure if feminist--i am a male only child and yup its me dembotoz May 2014 #17

I'm personally affected by two elderly parent scenarios, and in both of them a son ... 11 Bravo May 2014 #24

I took care of my Dad, as I was the only surviving child. blueamy66 May 2014 #26

I don't get why you think that this is primarily a feminist issue... countryjake May 2014 #32

Yeah, I'm gonna need that link you mentioned. Jenoch May 2014 #33

Do you have sisters? Nine May 2014 #34

I wish you would stay on topic in your own thread. Jenoch May 2014 #35

So you understand how women feel when they are expected to do it by their brothers. bettyellen May 2014 #43

I meant to add this. Nine May 2014 #48

Happily, this was not the case - 3 brothers and 2 sisters, all pitched in Justice May 2014 #36

I belong to an Eldercare support group at work AnnieBW May 2014 #45

I could have used this advice 5 years ago. RobertEarl May 2014 #46