The GOP implosion is giving me a boner... [View all]

[Glamrock]

Last edited Sun Feb 14, 2016, 01:01 PM - Edit history (1)

I just watched the GOP "presidential" debate. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. Is this fun or what? The level of schadenfreude I feel watching the self-engineered implosion of the GOP is sooo high and soooo delicious I have an erection. My apologies to the permanently offended. But shit, this is great. From every angle you look at it from.

Looking at the beltway media is like walking through Willie Wonka's garden. The constant looks of incredulity and confusion at the rise of Trump and Sanders has been like picking candy off the bushes and drinking chocolate from the stream. Oh, and here's the mushroom filled with creme! Liberals have been predicting this since Reagan put this coalition of loons together in the first place. That's an awfully thick bubble they're living in if 30+ years of warnings are so unheard that Trump can take them by surprise. And Bernie? Almost the same fucking thing! How long did they actually think the American people wouldn't notice money in the political apparatus? How long did they think the economic gains could continue to be vacuumed up to the top before the pendulum swung back to the left? It's fucking comical watching them derisively spit Bernie's name from their mouths. The horror, the sheer fucking horror they experienced when the FDR socialist trounced Hillary in NH, right? I could actually taste the tears welling up in Chris Mathews' eyes. Once again, boner inducing.

And speaking of tears, there's the GOP establishment. Oh fuck, the taste of GOP tears. Like Jack Daniels Honey. So smooth. Sooo delicious. Watching the monster they created stomping around beating on Fox, Jeb!, the RNC, Cruz, Rubio, Carson. Holy shit, man. This is freaking awesome! The brain dead horde is now splitting off into groups that don't trust Fox, or don't trust Glen Beck, or don't trust their own fucking eyes. Like Spanish fly! And the bonus. The establishment candidates can't get a foothold regardless of how much money is spent.

Which leads us to the donor class. Sure to be a viagra like rush of blood to be found here! Sure enough! Millions spent on Walker, Christie, Cruz, Rubio, and Jeb!. For nothing! Nothing! Millions upon millions upon millions pissed away. They've influenced nothing! Trump is Bizarro Superman. Evil, dumb, and can't be controlled. He's the reason these guys are throwing good money after bad out the window. And even better, their heavy-handedness with the political influence they've bought has, in fact, made a 74 year old socialist jew an actual contender for President of the United States. Oh yeah, he's purple and angry now. That is like viagra!

And finally, the horse race. The cherry on the top. The show of shows. A collection of dimwitted idiots the Three Stooges could look down on. Sarah Palin lowered the bar so low, anything is acceptable. And it shows. Good Christ man. Seriously? Ben Carson actually killed off some of my brain cells. I'm not kidding. I'm now dumber from just hearing what he had to say. And the rest? "You're a poopyhead!" "Nuh-uh!" "Nuh-hu!" "No, you're a poopyhead!" "Nuh-uh!" Then bad idea, bad idea, not grounded in reality, Reagan, Reagan, Reagan. "You're a poopyhead!" John Kasich: "Oh for fuck's sake!" Bad idea, bad idea. The pure stupidity, racism, and theocratic bent is fully on display for the 70% of the country that hasn't drunk the cool-aid. I'm like a 15 year old in his first makeout session. The implosion of the GOP is giving me a boner.

P.s. I know what's at stake. I know the troubles facing this nation. I don't wanna hear it. I'm 44. It can rarely crack granite like it used to. Lemme enjoy it.