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In reply to the discussion: Post removed [View all]moriah
(8,311 posts)Last edited Wed Nov 22, 2017, 03:00 AM - Edit history (1)
To the OP, not the subthread regarding state laws (sorry for those fyi, if you want to go to a bar and your ass not be legally up for grabbing, you can come and visit the Arkansas side of Texarkana).
My grandmother, not knowing yet that my sister was being molested, screwed with my sister's head BAD when she tried to give her opinion of boys, consent, and unplanned pregnancy without being exact about pregnancy being what she was referring to.
She said, in my hearing, "Boys will be boys, so it's up to the woman to put up the stop sign or whatever happens is her own fault."
And that HAS been the paradigm we've been culturally dealing with -- men being encouraged to pursue, women being judged for saying yes (or buying books wanting to get married that tell them to play hard to get) so guys think "No" has multiple meanings -- or at the very least is seen as a challenge to overcome rather than a statement of non-consent.
It's great for women to feel comfortable with putting a man in his place for violating boundaries.
But damn, that was a $7 drink and I was only half-done with it, it shouldn't have taken throwing it in his face for him to get his hand off my fucking ass and back away.
I want my $3.50 back.