One of the Keys to opening the door to 12 Step Programs.. What is a Higher Power.?

[MrsBrady]

2. while I agree with you...

when I first started in al-anon (and I was thinking about suicide at the time)
the only thing that kept me going was to try to be a better person so that I could still mother the child that I lost
to a miscarriage that put me under the table, and sent me to my bottom.

If someone can't get better for themselves at first, but it trying to do it for something or someone else at first...I think that is ok.
Because if it's keeping you sober or sane to work the program for another person, I say so be it.
If someone is trying to stay sober or sane to help their kids, I say fine...

The point being...
By the time you've worked the steps and done the deal, and keep doing the deal, you'll be doing it for yourself.

I certainly work the program for me now, but I didn't very much like myself at the time I came in the program.
I had to have a reason other than me, even though I don't think I really knew that at the time.