haaalp! every time my light begins to shine...

[Myrina]

7. I am confused.

You say he is 'sexually harassing' you. Sexual harassment is about power, control and ownership - as you state. But he is a janitor, not in a position to advance or hinder your career. Also, I don't see anything in your post about him making overt comments TO you (A la Clarence Thomas and the pubic hair), just asking people about you and trying to get your attention/gauge your interest.

To me it seems as if he is genuinely emotionally challenged or learning disabled, and yes probably does have attachment issues - maybe never learned how to appropriately interact with women because of those things. Some people fixate on a 'perfect mate' whether there's any reality to it or not, and if he is emotionally unbalanced, ignoring him is only going to make him intensify his efforts.

As a devil's advocate comment - you seem to have a propsensity to 'find' sexual harassment on a fairly regular basis. Could it be that you're the one who's fixating on him as a harasser because that's what your past experiences have programmed you to do?