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Member since: 2002
Number of posts: 41,736

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The existence of this book diminishes us all

Some of Arpaio's former guests have compiled a book on surviving in his Olive Drab Gulag. It is available here:


Tax cuts were never intended to increase tax revenues, so stop saying that

The GOP's primary goal is to end social spending. The only way they'll ever accomplish that goal is to reduce revenues to the point where there's no money left for it, and the most time-proven way to reduce revenues is just to stop collecting so many taxes.

It's obvious we need the Keystone XL pipeline

The gas station across the street from my house hasn't cut their prices in two whole days.

Congress adjourns after two days: "There's no way we can work with that man"

WASHINGTON (Spurious News Network) -- In what may set a record for brevity, Congress adjourned a mere two days into the new session.

According to House Majority Whip Steve Scalise, the adjournment is a result of President Obama's refusal to compromise. "We passed three Obamacare-repeal bills, approved the Keystone XL pipeline, banned abortion, eliminated taxes on the rich, abolished welfare, banned Islam, repealed Obamacare again, made homelessness a federal offense, and quadrupled the defense budget. Not only did that uppity (man) veto them all two seconds after they got to the White House, he put them in a garbage can, poured five gallons of gasoline on them and threw in a lit molotov cocktail. Since there's no way we can work with that man, we closed down Congress. Fuck it. We're going home to campaign. We'll just see if America can get along without us."

Within minutes of Scalise's announcement, the tragic results were plain for all to see. The stock market instantly began a meteoric climb, with the Dow closing at 19050.20. The price of gas dropped a dime. Newspaper classified ad lines were jammed, with companies waiting as long as three hours to place "help wanted" ads. According to the head of the White House switchboard, people have been calling in to complain all day: "The public wants to know why Congress shut down on a day when it was too cold to dance in the streets. They want to know why Congress couldn't have been more considerate."

For his part, the president is unruffled. "He considers Congress to be in recess, so he's entitled to appoint judges and other officials to serve through 2016," said a White House official who refused to be identified, but he's a skinny 50-year-old black guy with a head of gray hair. "Taxes will not be adjusted, and spending will remain at current levels. We should be okay."

I've been thinking about Mario Cuomo lately, since he passed...

Fort Drum is a U.S. Army installation in upstate New York, and the home of the 10th Mountain Division (Light Infantry), the Army's worst clusterfuck. It's the only army base that is not on federal land - the whole installation actually belongs to the State of New York, and the federal government pays them rent. (It's also the only army base that has a creek running through division headquarters, but that is a story for another time.)

Since Fort Drum was on land that belonged to the state of New York, Governor Mario Cuomo assumed the division also belonged to the state of New York. And since we were his division, once a quarter he flew from Albany to Fort Drum to speak to all the newly assigned sergeants and officers.

As I remember, he didn't really say much of anything...he told us about his state, gave us a little information about all the National Guard and Reserve units that commandeered the Back 40 every summer - as the only large Army post in the Northeast, we served hundreds of small units that needed our base's facilities for weapons qualification and all the other things you can't do in an armory next to a supermarket - explained a little about the political system in New York, and welcomed us to Fort Drum.

I can't think of another governor that did anything like that, and it was a nice thing.
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