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jmowreader

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Member since: 2002
Number of posts: 43,853

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As seen in a Mexican newspaper...

So here I sat perusing the internet while waiting for a huge sign to print out, and I found this. Take it for what you will

- - - - -

HELP WANTED
Steady Work • High Pay • Great Danger
Mexican Ministry of Internal Security

The American president Donald J. Trump, who you should not call “estupido pendejo” even though he is, has recently begun a project to build a huge wall between our beautiful country and the United States. The construction firms selected to construct the wall were chosen for their corruption and willingness to give money to President Trump rather than their ability to perform the work. This has led to the terrible situation of the wall starting to collapse into Mexico.

President Obrador finds it unacceptable that Mr. Trump’s wall could collapse and crush a Mexican citizen to death, and has ordered the military to take steps to keep this from happening.

The Minister of Internal Security is now taking applications for people with the skill and bravery to install shoring along Mr. Trump’s wall to keep it from falling completely into Mexico.

Successful candidates will use flatbed tractor-trailer rigs, well-drilling equipment, concrete trucks, forklifts, cranes, scissor lifts and SMAW (stick) welding equipment to attach steel girders at a 45-degree angle between a well-placed footing and a bracket welded to the wall.

The length of this contract is Indefinite. The minister believes that because the wall is being built by corrupt contractors we will never be done propping it up.

Qualifications include one year of experience in any of the skills needed to construct this project. Applicants with multiple skills will be viewed favorably. All applicants must have been citizens of Mexico before Trump was elected.

Due to the multiple and extreme dangers presented by this work, which include high temperatures, water shortages, venomous and aggressive animals, President Trump’s supporters, and the everpresent risk of the wall collapsing on the workforce, the rate of pay is 1000 pesos per hour.

Interested persons should apply with resume at their local Army Recruiting office.

Discuss amongst yourselves...

Did Trump announce the repeal of the Obama-era school lunch reforms on Michelle Obama’s birthday in retaliation for the Obamas’ Oscar nomination?

Trump's first night

It seems that after the impeachment trial there was a criminal trial in which Trump was given twenty years in Sing Sing.

He arrived at the prison and was processed in, then was taken to his cell block to meet the shot caller.

“Mr. Trump, there is no violence or prison rape here so you can stop worrying about those things. But you’ve come on a special night.”

Later that night, Trump was lying in his bed still scared shitless when he starts hearing people yell out numbers. He went to the shot caller and asked him what was going on.

“We’re telling jokes. We’ve all been here so long we know all the jokes there are by heart, so we numbered them. Now we can tell a lot more jokes in one night. We’ll get you a copy of the list of jokes tomorrow.”

Trump thought that was a neat idea and decided to get in on the fun. So he screamed out at the top of his lungs, “fifty-six.”

No one laughed.

He screamed out “fifty-six” even’ louder. No one laughed.

Trump turned to the shot caller. “Is fifty-six a bad joke?”

“No, Mr. Trump, fifty-six is a really good joke. Problem is, some guys just can’t tell a joke.”
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