cyclonefence

cyclonefence's Journal

October 31, 2018

After surgery

I had a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction a week ago and am doing fine. Pathology reports came back negative (despite what our *president believes, negative is good when you're checking for cancer) and margins of the tumor removed were clean, so all looks good. The drains are a nuisance, but pain is minimal, which surprises me. Honestly, I have taken a total of 7 pain pills, including during my overnight in the hospital. The pains I do get seem to be positional, and when I change position, the pain goes away, so I don't see the point of constipating myself for a pain that's going to go away anyhow.

I do have a chemo port, but I'm assuming that will be removed. I don't know why I'd be getting chemo if everything is clear and contained. But who knows? I did chemo the first time around, and it wasn't as horrible as I'd thought it would be. I can take it a second time. I've avoided getting a haircut because I assumed I'd have chemo and my hair would fall out again, but if I don't have chemo, I'll have the worst hairdo in town until I can get somebody to cut this.

Thanks again for all the good wishes from you here. Positive vibrations cannot but help.

October 12, 2018

Bad Times at the El Real spoilers

Wow. This movie blew me away.

I wonder if anyone who was not at least a teenager in the '60s will appreciate it. You need to know about J. Edgar Hoover and his hard-on for finding dirt on MLK, about the Manson Family, about dirty tricks in Nixon's administration, about Viet Nam and fragging--and oh, the glorious music!

October 8, 2018

Thank you all for your kind words

You can't know how much your support means to me. I'm sort of a loner, so I don't have many people other than my husband to vent to, and I really hate burdening him with what is essentially the same old shit day after day--to wit: Why can't we get moving on this? I'm going crazy waiting for things to happen!

I saw the plastic surgeon again today, and I made him promise not to make me look like a teenager. I go for my final pre-surgery visit with the surgeon on Wednesday and then to the hospital for pre-admission stuff on Thursday. Surgery is scheduled for the 23rd.

It can't come soon enough. This tumor is growing, it really is. My left breast, which was smaller than my right one, no longer hangs as low. And it sort of burns. I want this thing out of me.

October 6, 2018

I got the CAT scan and the bone scan

last week, and I saw a plastic surgeon. My original plan was to have a mastectomy with no reconstruction, mostly because I'm an old lady and didn't want one floppy original breast and one pert fake breast. But my oncologist suggested I think about a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction, and out of love for my husband, I decided to do that, despite my dislike of the idea of implants. My husband fully supported my no reconstruction--he is truly on my side in this--but I know he will be uncomfortable with a flat, scarred chest on one side. We have a shamefully active sex life, and his comfort is important to me.

And I do like the idea of having both breasts removed, not worrying about another recurrence.

So that's where I am now. Surgery is scheduled for the 23rd. Next week I have final appointments with the surgeon, plastic surgeon and the hospital. I think I've had all the tests I can get, and I'm ready to get this over with.

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Member since: Mon Dec 5, 2016, 05:05 PM
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