You can start by not promoting the "abortion as birth control" lie that has been spewed by women-haters for 50 years.
How you deal with it is to boldly say it isn't true, as you do all lies, and demand evidence that it is.
"Further complicating the argument is it seems over half of them are women, who are concerned with the morality of abortion over the convenience of it".
To imply that women seek abortions for "convenience" and lack a moral compass is outrageous. You can start by questioning the morality of people who want women under their thumb.
"My point is simply to argue smart, rather than loud, and discuss with everyone, rather than preach to our crowd."
Where have you been for the last 50 years when pro-choice advocates have been working their butts off trying to keep abortion safe and legal so women can make their own health decisions? Have you lobbied antis at your state legislature? Have you done outreach to antis in your community? Have you worked for pro-choice candidates for 50 years?
The end result is that the GQP party made the political decision to use abortion to fundraising and bring fundamentalist christo-fascists out of their burrows and into politics. It is all about gaining POWER to enforce their agenda.
You can sweet talk with antis all you want, in the end their political party and religious leaders will win.