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DFW

(54,895 posts)
14. We have the same issue with my wife's mother
Sat Oct 8, 2022, 03:33 AM
Oct 2022

We were just up at her place in a tiny town up north for her 95th birthday. She is nearly blind and is going deaf. She has hearing aids, but is too stubborn to use them. She insists on staying in the house she has lived in for over 30 years. We checked the assisted living facilities in her area, but they were awful. A friend of hers, the same age as she, and in better health, moved into one of them two or three years ago. She was dead within two weeks.

My wife and I are now both 70. We have had our house for 32 years now, and have accumulated some stuff over the years. Anything of value, I’ll have sent to Heritage Auctions in Dallas, since I have connections there, and the insignificant stuff can probably be disposed of locally, if and when. Our Germany-based daughter is an attorney—she’ll know someone who can do the mechanics.

I still work full time, and I’m in a different country practically every day. I’ve got to start slowing down at some point, but I’m not there yet. I fear boredom will kill me quicker than my work schedule. My wife is “retired,” although she is more active now than when she was working. Her most-oft repeated phrase is, “I just don’t have time for that!” Like Warren Zevon sang, “I’ll sleep when I’m dead.” Which, come to think of it, he now is.

Moving in to independent or assisted living. [View all] PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 OP
I'm in the same boat Basic LA Oct 2022 #1
Good for you. PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 #2
Very much on point. niyad Oct 2022 #3
That's wonderful. PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 #4
I just looked at www.newmexico.org and found the listing ffor the niyad Oct 2022 #6
Ahhh, yes. PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 #12
St Lawrence County here! Karma13612 Oct 2022 #21
Good luck on all your endeavors & good advice for the rest of us MagickMuffin Oct 2022 #5
Actually, one of the things I did for them PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 #9
The studios sound great! Karma13612 Oct 2022 #22
Unfortunately, if your only income is SS, PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 #29
Nope, house doesn't crack Karma13612 Oct 2022 #31
I'm with you. Joinfortmill Oct 2022 #7
Is it Sweden that has that custom where people clear out their junk at a certain age Demovictory9 Oct 2022 #8
Yes, it's Sweden. A wonderful thing. PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 #10
Very important post! LittleGirl Oct 2022 #11
Thank you for sharing. PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 #13
Updating a will is just as important too LittleGirl Oct 2022 #16
We have the same issue with my wife's mother DFW Oct 2022 #14
I hear stories like this, your elderly mother and her situation, all too often. PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 #15
For me, not working would be my downfall DFW Oct 2022 #19
Making Music is not a pass time for me. msfiddlestix Oct 2022 #23
I take it seriously as well, don't get me wrong DFW Oct 2022 #24
I know exactly what you mean... msfiddlestix Oct 2022 #27
DFW, you really should consider slowing down LittleGirl Oct 2022 #17
I consider it, but so far, choose not to. DFW Oct 2022 #18
My father moved into a CCRC* 10 years ago, best move ever sir pball Oct 2022 #20
Excellent advice. n/t LuckyCharms Oct 2022 #25
There are two extremely popular continuing care retirement communities mnhtnbb Oct 2022 #26
Yeah a continuing care retirement community would be nice. PoindexterOglethorpe Oct 2022 #30
Very valuable advice and PSA HipChick Oct 2022 #28
Most people aren't as practical or realistic as you and I. llmart Oct 2022 #32
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